timidtwo

All she has to do is walk into the room sometimes, and I am in instant schwing mode. I can't say that we've ever used food, but we sure have used a lot of other ways to keep things playful! Clothing, (or lack there of), cat calls, raised eye brows, music, "mood" lighting and candles...

Another board on here was talking about "titty fucking". On that string was a post from LEISL, I believe, that stated she wasn't confident in herself and her image. The following article will take you to an article that replicates my response to her: How to be Irresistible to Men By Melissa Balmer Copyright © 2006, Seduction Insider, www.seductioninsider.com. “People who are physically beautiful, who play on their beauty to create a sexually charged presence, have little power in the end; the bloom of youth fades, there is always someone younger and more beautiful, and in any case people tire of beauty without social grace.” - Robert Greene / The Art of Seduction (This article, How To Be Irresistible To Men, was requested by a reader on the Discussion Board.) Like Yourself Truly liking yourself is much easier said than done, but really important if you want to be 'irresistible to men'. If you’re like most people you have a negative tape running almost constantly in your head. This negative tape not only foresees negative situations happening for you in the future (ever find yourself rehearsing possible arguments that might never even happen?), it constantly points out your flaws to you. In order to stop this negative tape you need to replace the nasty chatter with positive feedback, and in order to really boost your confidence, the positive feedback you give yourself needs to become your new part time job. What are you proud of about yourself? What are you good at? Whenever you realize you’re running that negative tape stop and remind yourself of what you like about yourself. The more you like yourself the more men are going to like you. Why? Because the more you like yourself, the more you know how to have a good time and enjoy the moment – and there’s nothing men like more than showing a woman a good time, whether it’s on a date, or in bed. Like Men This sounds so obvious I’m sure you’re wondering why I’m writing it. But guess what, there’s a big difference between wanting a man to be your boyfriend, or husband, or sexually, and really liking men as people. Be a Wicked Flirt By this I don’t mean you have to say naughty things to men to catch their attention (unless you want to), I mean you’ve got to hone your flirting skills and know when to use them. Some men are so afraid of being too forward that they’ll only make a move, ask you out on a date, or more, if the woman herself makes it very clear she’s interested. Being a great flirt doesn’t mean you let the guy know you’ll be waiting by the phone for him, being a great flirt means you act in a way that recognizes he’s a man, and desirable, and you’d like to get to know him better. Be a Bit Mysterious According to the great, and super sexy actress Sophia Loren, “Sex appeal is 50 percent what you’ve got and 50 percent what people think you’ve got.” So many of us feel the need to lay all of our past on the table as soon as we meet a man we have some connection with. I’m not at all advising you should be dishonest and lie about your life, but I am suggesting that you wait to tell a man the more challenging aspects of what you’ve had to deal with until you know him a little better. Let me be more plain – don’t dish the dirt about your past, or even your present, on the first date. Men usually become physically attracted to a woman first, so even though they may act all ears and openness, it takes them longer than it takes most women to feel emotionally attracted. A man may really like you, but if you open up and share with him about your terrible divorce, the bankruptcy you had to go through, your challenges at your work place, and any other myriad of personal challenges he may get overwhelmed and run. You might just be sharing honestly and are doing a great job of handling your life – but what he hears is that you expect him to save you, and for him to want to save you, he first has to feel a true emotional connection to you. “The Smartest Women know that Sometimes Giving Less gets you More Than Giving More” The above quote is from Steven Carter and Julia Sokol’s great book “Men Like Women Who Like Themselves.” One of the fastest ways to lose a man’s interest is to be too interested in him too fast. Are men contrary creatures? No, not usually, they’re just human beings, and human beings want to be romantically and sexually involved with someone who’s “special.” We want someone who isn’t going to give their time, and interest, and physical intimacy to just anyone – and when a woman (who might not have found someone she likes so well in ten years) shows a man right a way that she’s all attention, all available, and all his, rather than being flattered he often decides she’s desperate and would be this way for just about any guy. He also fears she’s ready to take over his every waking moment before he’s even had a chance to figure out what he feels. And guess what? Men don’t play fair in this. He might well be the one who pursued you in the beginning, he may be the one who called the most at first, and emailed the most, but if you want to play it safe, and keep his fascination, don’t match the amount of attention he pays you at first – and certainly don’t exceed it. Learn to chill when you really feel interested, count to ten, go for a brisk walk, call a friend, rent a movie, but don’t pick up the phone. Do only to half, or one-third, of the responding, calling, emailing etc. that you’d normally do until you’ve had time to get to know the guy better. Let him come to you. Let him call. If there’s real chemistry, a real spark, that’s exactly what he’ll do. Know Where Your Allure is Most Powerful Just the other night I was reminded again that nightclubs just aren’t my scene. Once I’m out on the dance floor, getting my groove on, things usually change a bit. Since, however, I’m one of those women who look incredibly serious unless I’m in an animated conversation, I’ve never been one who’s constantly picked out of the dim lit crowd, whereas I’ve always had girlfriends who men walk up to and instantly proclaim love. The truth is that unless I’m dancing to music I enjoy, or hanging out with a group of friends I enjoy, I end up being quite bored at nightclubs and men totally sense this. I like witty banter and great conversation. I’m far better one on one, and my best success with men comes when I can show off my verbal skills. I do better meeting men on the Internet, and quite frankly on the street, because even though I look reserved, I can literally walk up and talk to anyone. Also men seem to find me more approachable when I’m alone. Where is your allure most powerful? In what social setting do you feel most comfortable, and feel you really shine? Forget what you think is hip and cool, and focus instead on setting up that “right” type of social setting for yourself as often as possible. Perhaps, like me, nightclubs might not be your scene, but perhaps you shine when you entertain, or have a goal that has to be accomplished (like a scavenger hunt, or a game of poker), or can overcome your shyness by being involved in a good cause. Great men are everywhere, not just at the local hotspots, but you won’t dazzle them unless you’re in your element. Own Your Sexuality The sexiest, most alluring women own their sexuality. By this I mean that they don’t expect a man to discover what turns them on and works for them sexually – they’ve taken the time and interest to figure it out for themselves. Sometimes owning your own sexuality comes from the inside out, and sometimes from the outside in. It’s up for you to decide just what’s going to be the right path for you to discover yourself. Put Forth Your Best “You” Women who like themselves and own their sexuality take care of their appearance. You don’t have to be a fashion plate, or as skinny as the Olsen twins to attract a man’s desire. You just need to be the best you, and be ready to share her with the world. Men, as we hear over and over again, are very visual. Graham Masterton, author of “Secrets of the Sexually Irresistible Woman” writes “…that a man will make a decision about whether he finds you sexually irresistible within seconds of setting eyes on you.” http://www.seductioninsider.com/women/how_...le_to_men.shtml

You do not need to be embarrassed. Let's talk about reality. There will ALWAYS be someone better looking to the "EYE", just like their will always be someone richer, more powerful, etc. etc... BUT you have to be able to grab another person's heart in a way that they will REFUSE to let go, no matter how big the next set of boobs that walk into the room, are. I was recently talking to a few friends of mine at work, and we ALL agreed, that the number one thing we as men, want in a woman is for her to be confident in herself. We all agreed that there is FAR more sex appeal in finding ONE woman to be with, who believes in herself, thinks she is worthy and wants to please and be pleased in bed, than a drop dead gorgeous woman who could sign a magazine contract if she wanted, yet still thinks she needs to be "prettier", or "thinner", or have "bigger breasts", etc.. etc.. Not a one of us disagreed. We admitted that our eyes may and most likely will turn to the Drop Dead Gorgeous one, but our hearts are glued to the ONE who loves to love and be loved just as she is!!!!

I agree chickenmom, People can be at different points in their life than others. Therefore, some are more open to some things than I am, or you are, or someone else is. You and I have agreed on some stuff here, both on the boards and in PM's. This is one where I have to disagree with your assumption that him using a toy is almost like cheating. There is a HUGE difference between toys enhancing sexuality, and cheating on a spouse/sig other. Just my two cents worth.

Absolutely! This was a purchase I greatly regret! I bought the purple one. No suction, but supposed to be a great power packed product. http://shop.tootimid.com/index.asp?PageAct...ROD&ProdID=3452 The stroking beads created ZERO sensation. I could hear it "working", but the TOP CAT POCKET PAL was a much better product at only $20, instead of $80... I found this to be a huge disappointment.

Last night, I was taking my time on my wife, and letting the vibrator work inside her, while I was also massaging her clit by hand! I kept encouraging her to "let herself go", she made her "please get in me now" non verbal move that comes easily recognized with 13 years of experience together. After we were done, she said, "I don't want to be a mood killer, but I have GOT to pee!" I asked her if she had to go before we started, and she said, "No, it was right at the end, just before you were in me." I could only smile, and know that I was doing my "marital duty" properly! Now, she is not familiar with FE, and I sent her a link to read about it, haven't heard anything from her yet. I will be asking her this weekend, unless she asks me first!

Soft, Tight & Firm Masturbator for Men This product was interesting to me. It was a bit heavy and cumbersome, it felt awkward as I began to use it. I found this to be both a positive and a negative: For the positive aspect, it made me feel very large in my hand. That was a fascinating sensation! This took an old act and put a new spin on it. In regard to this being a negative aspect, it was almost unnatural and the realism of the act of masturbation was lost by the bulkiness and weight of the product. Another aspect of this that was definitely not for me, was that I used what seemed to be an incredibly significant amount of lubrication, and it would not maintain a feeling of lubrication that was comfortable. It would get tacky and my skin would stick to the inside, and lose the sensation of thrusting. I am inclined to think that the reason it was difficult for the product to maintain a sense of being lubed is because it was really snug! This too was a mixed aspect for me. The tightness was quite realistic, and very nice. As long as the lubrication level remained high. Trying to use my imagination, I tried to use it, without holding it in my hand. I did this by sticking it between the mattress and the box spring. To me, this was an outstanding way to use the product. It was not "heavy and cumbersome" as I described above, and it was a little bit less snug, and maintained a good spread of lubrication during use. This was the best way for me to use it. Therefore, I would have to say that if someone experiments a little bit, and uses their imagination, this is a product that will be a potentially nice way to gain relief on those nights when your significant other is just not available for whatever reason! If one way of using it does not work, be creative, and it might become a pleasant success by utilizing it in another way. Despite the fact that I was initially disappointed by its functionality by holding it with my hand(s), it has its positives and negatives for me, and I ended up finding a great way to use it.

She and I are basically on the same page with this. Her desire is something best left in "fantasyland". Because, fantasy stays fun, reality can get UGLY and dangerous. Prostitutes are not an acceptable option for us. In regards to being robbed, you're right. Both of us are being robbed. Someday, I hope she gets past it, and we get to move on from this. I can understand how she associates oral with me, and being forced to by someone else. Memory triggers... PTSD, as soldiers can go through after being in battle. They come home, hear a car backfire, and they hit the deck, thinking someone is shooting at them. We have one of our local schools that is just at the southend of the runway to the local airport. We also have a National Guard base that flies regularly from that airport... Teachers we know from that school have told us that kids who have immigrated here from war torn areas, hear almost any plane fly fly over, while landing and/or taking off, and they get scared senseless because the planes that used to fly over them that low, only did one thing... Drop BOMBS and/or shoot at them! Some of them had to relocate to another building across town.

Nicely put, howard! Kids today, more than ever are forced to grow up, too fast! Let them grow up first, and then learn about it at an appropriate time. I talked to my 11 year old son about the time he found the vibrators. I told him, matter of fact-like, without scolding or making it sound like he was compromising National Security: "First of all, You're not in trouble! For now, I just want you to know that those are for something you will understand more about later in life. Until then, we just want you to know that those belong to us, and kids don't need to have them or understand them. Fair enough? He agreed, and hasn't said, done or asked another thing since! Of course, they are now in a little black bag, locked in the closet, too.

Here's the deal... She and I got a sitter the other night, went out for supper, and then I drove to a park, and we sat and talked... Here is her response to this discussion. "I would love a threesome, I am fascinated by the thought of you and I sucking on another woman's breasts and then both of you playing with mine at the same time, then let you two have oral together. I would never want to be with just another woman. With only another woman, there'd be no dick, and that'd be boring!" She laughed at the thought of being lesbian, but admits being bi-curious. I asked her to explain to me why she doesn't like oral sex with me. She was molested by one of her uncles when she was younger. He would force her (and/or one of her other sisters) to give him head. The times she has tried to give me head, it mentally brings her right back to when he did that to her. He never forced her into intercourse, just oral sex. So, that's why she loves intercourse, but not oral. So, she does have unfulfilled desires to be with another woman. She said that watching some of the movies she has watched in the past, which included threesomes with two women and one man, she gets incredibly turned on. She isn't sure that she could give or receive oral between herself and another woman. Since she's never been forced into oral sex with a woman in the same way, she can't say, for sure, but she does know that her initial reaction is a negative one.

Hard question to answer. Not too many women who want to be with another woman would want to be with someone who is NOT into giving and/or receiving oral! I know that part of the reason she has a really hard time talking openly, is because of her upbringing. I mean rollerskating and dancing were immoral! No joke! Rollerskating and dancing both might actually make you horny (premarital sex). In regards to her liking oral, maybe she isn't thinking the whole act through when it comes to being with a woman. OR, you're right "lesbian oral" isn't a bother to her and therefore... she's lesbian and masquerading as a married wife with kids, to try and convince herself and everyone else, that she's not lesbian! or she is BI, and like intercourse with cock, but also wants oral with another woman!

The kids are a tough one because of the premature timing the revelation can occur, that's for sure. Lucky for us, it was while no one else was at home. My 11 yr old son came out of the bedroom once night and said to my wife, "Hey mom, what's this? All it does is vibrate!" Being this was not long after we started using toys she didn't know what to say, other than, "Put it back where you found it. Its your father's!!!" -------------- As far as other adults, I agree with howard. THEY should be the ones embarassed that they don't have any, we shouldn't be embarassed that we do! They should be jealous, not suspicious. But, with today's environment of political correctness, (which, for the most part, I have absolute DISTAIN for.) and unable to discuss anything sexual anywhere, it seems that anyone who does talk about it is rude, crude and socially unacceptable! That is the time most people call for the TMI (too much information) police to arrest you. Or they can't possibly believe that you are ACTUALLY talking like that, because you are not supposed to "kiss and tell".

Honestly, that issue caught my attention before you ever posted it. and is exactly what I meant when I stated that we will "take our medicine" when we need to. For clarification's sake... Only one roadblock... no oral sex... So, there are not "road blocks", just one... We both want and do everything else we have come up with so far. We are open to suggestion for expanding our abilities and imagination, and will contemplate any suggestions we receive, together. My claim that our love life is "just fine" is true. What we do together, we do well, and that is great. Maybe "improvement" isn't the word we should use when we ask for advice... "Expansion" is probably better... Expansion of our horizons, abilities, and imaginations... 1. We love mutual masturbation. 2. We love to kiss. 3. We love to have intercourse in various positions. a. Missionary b. Doggy Style c. him on top d. her on top e. him standing beside the bed.. f. this is where each of YOU come in... help us find f, g, h, i, j, k... 4. We love using our toys. a. two vibrators- one thin one thick and soft b. one bendi-beaver c. again, this is where the rest of you come in... help us fill in c, d, e, f 5. you each come in again here... help us fill in 5, 6, 7, etc...

WOW... What a sad statement. Those were shallow men... EXACTLY! There are too many things that we BOTH want, and BOTH like, and BOTH do... Why would I throw away every that is good, just because of ONE thing that we disagree about? She has never enjoyed it. She's tried. Many times, because she knows I like it. It just isn't for her, and I won't make her do it, when there are so many other things we'll do together. For this we are very appreciative! Thank YOU!! We know that there are things that neither one of us have imagined possible between the two of us, and we want to find out what they might be! We want suggestions. That's why we're here. No problem... sometimes the truth hurt and advice isn't always easy to hear, especially when something doesn't seem "quite right" to a third party, and when they bring it up, it can be a tough pill to swallow. If we need to "take our medicine", then we will!

I stay because, there are things we do participate in together sexually, and both are fulfilled by, quite well: What she does demand from me, she DOES reciprocate! She wants me to do clit stim to her... She finds that "SPOT" underneath my sack, and drives me insane with it! She wants me to suck on her breasts, she sucks on my chest and back! She wants me to kiss her, she kisses me! She wants me to give her my penis, she gives me her vagina. She wants me to find her G Spot, with my hand and/or vibrator, she gives hand jobs that are UNBELIEVABLE! She occasionally wants me to talk dirty to her, she occasionally talks dirty to me. We are open to more than what we already have done, we just need to find it! Oral is just not going to be one of the items we will enjoy! Would I like it if she was into oral? YES, no question about it. But, would I be turned on, making her miserable by forcing to go down on me? NO! I have sometimes thought that maybe she did like it, but was afraid to admit it. But, with multiple attempts in the past twelve years, to give it to her, she has still stood her ground on this. If she demanded that I go down on her, and she refused to go down on me, then I would have a right to be pissed and feel cheated, and you'd have the right to call her "selfish"... With everything we DO have together, is it worth throwing all of those things away, just because of one thing we don't agree on? There are at least 6 things I listed that we both like, and do together... there's only one that we've found, that we disagree on, and we are looking for more to agree on... So, please, if I am missing something in this thought process, then explain how she is "selfish"... would you call her that if she refused to be my "sub" and I wanted to be her "dom"? Does it make someone selfish to deny their partner S & M if they themselves are not into it? No... Just not their forte! Is it selfish to tie someone up and gag them, and beat them against their will, even if the "punisher" is turned on by it?? YES, in fact, it is more than selfish! That's illegal, and you could be facing kidnapping and/or assault and/or rape charges! Wouldn't I be the one in the "wrong" for forcing her into oral sex? Again, I hope someday she does open up to it, but I am not going to 'throw out the baby with the bath water", and leave the 6 or more things we do enjoy doing together, just because of one thing we don't agree on... If she denied me ALL forms of pleasure, and wanted me to live celebate, with her, then that would justify a label such as "selfish"....

Many years ago, my wife told me that she is bi-curious. Not long after we got married, she stated to me, "I have been wondering what it would be like to have another woman in bed with us." In fact, we even discussed this again last week, and it is still something that she thinks about! If we were to entirely disclose our background, where we initially went to college, and a couple of jobs we have both had, you'd understand why this would be seen as such a "shocking" concept. The reason I even bring this up, is because we have struggled with the same thing that "hornybiwf4play" is asking. How do you EVER find someone who's willing to potentially help you fulfill that fantasy? If you ask that to the wrong person, then you're potentially going to create a lot of problems for yourself, both socially and professionally! "hornybiwf4play" is in a MUCH better position than we are, to follow up on this, because she has already gained enough trust with someone to have at least 'kissed'. She hasn't. We have basically gone with the thought that "fantasy" is best left, right where it is, in "fantasyland". We don't want to risk the potential, unnecessary exposure of our bodies to disease, which is a very substantial concern in today's world! Yet, we still have wondered, just "how" would we ever approach this subject with someone, if we were to want to follow through with trying to fulfill this fantasy?

She does not like the look. She says that it is not sexy, and doesn't like it. Ever since we first starting being intimate, over 12 years ago, she has not liked oral sex. That is something that I can live with, because her pleasure is more important to me, than my own. I have given her oral sex, and tried to give it to her many times, I thoroughly enjoy giving it! In fact, giving is a huge turn on for me, but 99.44% of the time, she won't let me do it, because, in her words, "I won't let you give me, what I won't give you!" Last time I gave it to her, she did not stop me, and reacted well physically, but afterwards, she wouldn't kiss me, because of "where that mouth has been", she told me that "You need to brush and use mouthwash, before I will kiss that again!" Honestly, I think we've come a long way, considering our first use of a toy was only two months ago. I have insisted that she be willing to initiate something new, anytime she wants, no matter how far out there it may seem! I have made it clear that I will do a lot more than she probably thinks I will, in order to make our bedroom, her sex throne/shrine. There is a reason we have the nickname of "timidtwo" on here... We're breaking out of a sexual coma, trying to expand our horizons beyond what either of us would have ever thought possible, even 3-6 months ago! We're both battling "timidity", but she is really more of the timid one than I am. In the words of my brother, "There's a little 'freak', in everyone." It is just that most of us are afraid to share it, even to those we should be able to share it with, without any reservation, what-so-ever.

I know she's liking it... I always ask her if she's done, once I am, and 99.44% of the time, she used to say 'yes'. There have been a few times, now that we've started using toys that when I ask, (including last night!!!!) she says something other than yes... Such as, NO, or not yet, or "not sure"... "Not sure"??? That meant "NO" to me, and I pulled out a vibrator, and used it on her for 20 minutes, while pinning her left arm underneath me, and her right arm with my hand, above her head... I then leglocked her left leg, leaving ONLY her right leg free to squirm while I made "SURE" she was done! She fought against the "bondage", in a very erotic way, until she was finally done, for "SURE"... I loved it, and so did she... When do I introduce more light bondage stuff, like an "under the bed" bondage leg and arm tie up kit??? Soon????

Still a NO GO... She doesn't like it... Gotta regrow!!!

I bought our ramp/wedge combo at a local store for $189.00. They gave a 10% discount if you bought both of them together. http://www.liberator.com/price_combo.php Money WELL spent! Just take the time to figure out what position you want them in... adjusting them while in the "heat of the moment" is not easy and can be a mood killer! They stay together quite well, and also maintain VERY good contact on bed sheets... They do NOT slide around... They provide really good support! Even for us "not so skinny" people!

Yes, I know! We have had 4 kids! I was in the room for the delivery of them all! I about passed out that first time , but I survived... A fist, though? OWIE! I guess I'm going to show my naivity, but I guess that is something I have NEVER thought of doing to her! I have seen the various "kegel balls", and thought she might like them, but that is something I want her to buy. I don't know if I should be "suggestively" buying them for her, rather than at her request. I also think that although she's REALLY starting to like the use of toys, she isn't completely "relaxed" over the idea, yet. So, be thinking of her, and send some positive vibes our way, so that she does relax and allow herself to engulf the toys and enjoy them "fullly" (pardon the pun!!!). By the way, we have not used anything morbidly large, the biggest is the BendiBeaver. -J (of J and K) P.S. You don't sound arrogant Mikayla! But I appreciate your modesty!

Let us think carefully... Forgive is one thing... and we need to forgive... The problem is, that too often, we think that to forgive someone means that we put ourselves in position to be VIOLATED, again!!!! WRONG!!!! LEAVE LEAVE LEAVE LEAVE LEAVE! You are NOT expected to be a doormat for a sleazeball like that. You are a woman, women have dignity. You are a mother, a mother protects at all costs! You are a person, a person lives life to the full! You can't live life to the full if you don't maintain your dignity, and protect your child and yourself from even the "potential" of harm. If the proven potential is there, then it is NOT worth the risk of putting yourself (or especially your child) in another position of being harmed again! I am a man, one of those "really nice" ones... but someone who does crap like that, drunk/sober/stoned or otherwise: that brings out an UGLY animal in me! They'd curse the day that they were born if they tried something like that to anyone in my circle of life!!!

That didn't take long... no more itch, and able to shave again today without a great deal of discomfort... I love the look down there, and really feel cleaner... Someone, somewhere on here made a comment about feeling cleaner, being shaved... I thought they were full of it... Sorry, whoever you were! Anyway, this morning, my wife commented, "I noticed your showers have gotten longer, lately. How come? Are you shaving or something?" she asked comically. I told her yes, but didn't give any details as to where. We'll see what she thinks, now that I am keeping it tight and smooth, instead of prickly like the last times I tried... I was always scared to take a razor blade down there!

Our first was a tiny little disposable cock ring. Got it out of a box of Trojan Condoms. It was small, it was annoying to use while I was "in" her, but it sure did a GREAT job during foreplay, and helping reduce self imposed defenses against "toys" for sex. It opened us up to a whole new world! We're still trying to get comfortable with toys... We've come a LONGGG way, baby, but Still have a ways to go, before we can comfortably explore further than we already have.

I didn't want to wait until either of us was "unhappy" to try to fix anything! I wanted to make things better (at least different, and provide some variety) before things were tough... You know what they say, "An ounce of prevention, saves a pound of cure!"