OPL Laundry Goddess

Our first toy was a 6 inch basic jelly slim line purchased at a local shop. It had amazing ice cream cone swirlies in the shaft and this lovely deep eggplant color, but was named "the sapphire." We used it a long time until the jelly just began disentigrating and I had to throw away the covering. I still have the metal innards hopping to just find a new sleeve one day, but so far no luck. That was years ago and this then timid girl is now edging into her fourties and is much more adventurous and daring. For overall over the edge orgamic power I have to say my Rabbit is the best! (we have three, the new one has a nice firm shaft that I just love) However, for versatility, I'd have to say my twin eggs are awesome. They are small, quiet, have lots of pulses and vibes, and there are TWO of them on this set. Much easier to travel with, or share with a friend! Double the pleasure, double the fun, you know? LOL Nothing like having that huge and intimidating rabbit fall out of a suit case for embarrassment factor. Not a problem with my wonderful eggs. Of course, I have not as yet strayed too far from the basic beginners and phallic shaped toys, but I am totally looking forward to everything that comes in a box from TooTimid. I've gotten quite adventurous of late and I'm enjoying broadening my horizons. ~the laundry goddess

Rob, have you considered an alternate lifestyle section? You could put it with the other relationship info. I know of at least one leasbian couple and another gay male that frequent the boards, and now you have we poly-folk lurking... another idea might be of a spiritual nature, (you could put it down with the politics??) as I know there are times when sexuality and people's desires can be in contrast to their belief systems... this might be a place for those to counsel each other?? ~the laundry goddess

Welcome to the boards, Shweet... Find a topic that interests you and dive right in! There are lots of neat people to meet here at TooTimid. ~the laundry goddess

I'm going to piggyback on what Iha and Mikayla have said... If there is a slow and gradual build up of sexual at some point the body will crave the orgasm. If you've passed that point and the feeling is too intense or uncomfortable, you've probably short circuited the process at somewhere along the way. This is an area that has to be a slow build at least while you are learning your body cues. If the direct stimulation isn't working, try indirect stimulation... try some sensual play rather than sexual play, cuddle and touch fully clothed, take a bubble bath. Sometimes sex is one of those "less is more" situations. good luck, ~the laundry goddess

On first instinct, I'd have to say Jack Ryan from the Tom Clancy novels. He has a bravery and intelligent integrity that does something for me... of course, the Alec Baldwin/Harrison Ford images dont hurt either. I'm sure there are some others, I'll put on my thinking cap. ~the laundry goddess

Not sure how quickly you need what you're looking for, but I've found some really nice things at our local Ren Faires in the spring time. ~the laundry goddess

My fav is a couple of years old, needs replacing now bec the jelly is beginning to deteriorate, but I just love it. Bought it at a local toy store, can't remember the brand, but called "the rose" because the part that lies against the clit is pink jelly rose. very nice. But I've seen ladybugs and butterflies, etc. ~TLG

Nicol, if you've never had or used a sex toy before, you might want to pause and evaluate your desires and interest levels. Will you be using this toy alone or with your partner? A dildo is usually where people begin, but if you generally have or prefer a clitoral orgasm over a vaginal one, you might want to consider a vibrator of some kind instead. One small and less threatening device I have come to love is a hands free clitoral stimulator. Those little guys come in all shapes and colors and can be worn close to the body while you are making love with your husband or SO. It's a nice combination, and it tends to be less awkward as a first step. I suggest you browse the shopping areas of TooTimid and find something that turns you on just from reading the description. Happy shopping! ~the laundry goddess

Welcome to TooTimid, Barbara! You'll find you are in good company here, and this is definitely the place to ask questions and get feedback. Don't be shy, just jump right in! ~the laundry goddess

OPL stands for Our Poly Life, the name of our website. www.OurPolyLife.org It's an ongoing chronicle of our alternative family. ~TLG

OMG, that thing sounds fantastic! Normally, Temptress and I are not so into dildos that don't "do" anything, but this toy - WOW - sounds amazing. We would totally love one of those. I guess we'll have to save up. ~the laundry goddess

I know some "friend of a friend" type acquaintances that have had luck with both Yahoo personals and eHarmony.com However... what I have heard best responses to is just being out there. Are you a member of any special interest boards? Like are you into gaming? or any particular reading genre? The internet is a wonderful way to connect, but I offer a word of caution too. When you meet someone, make sure you spend some time getting to know them, and whe/if you decide to meet in person, do so in a very public place. ~the laundry goddess

HAHA... Pappy, at our house that is NOTHING... you should be thrilled she is doing so well! Of course, there are two women accessing the toy box here. And, IMO, who wants to take the time to put the batteries in? When I want that toy, I want/need it NOW! Always be ready, right? Batteries are a very small price to pay. ~the laundry goddess

Honestly, I was quite a prude as a young and idealistic adult. I find the older I get, the more lenient I become especially where my sexuality is concerned. The way I look at it is this... periods are a natural part of life. Everyone in this word came out the same way covered in blood and "tissue." There are those that thoroughly enjoy anal intercourse and that has the potential for more ick factor than vaginal blood. Nothing a little soap and water won't fix. Or, alternatively, wear a condom. A clean body and some fresh cotton can allow for even amazing oral, just stay north of the string. However, if you are the squeamish type no big deal. Either way it's a personal choice. ~the laundry goddess

We have that book too and it is fabulous! The other books by the same author are just as fun. Congrats on finding a vib that works for her. It is a very personal choice and sometimes you don't hit it the first time out. Good for the two of you keeping up the search and finding one that really does it's job. ~the laundry goddess

yes, yes, and yes... I noticed that my interest in sex went up tremendously after the birth of our last child and hubby got the big V. Maybe I just finally felt "safe" to enjoy sex for the pleasure without considering the procreative nature of the act. Within a few years after that, I began really enjoying all of the details and intricacies and sensations. I learned more about my body and what really turns me on. We bought our first toys, I began loosening my grasp on preconceived notions of propriety, and really having honest dialogue with hubby about what we wanted and needed in our lives. By the time I hit 37, I would have finally considered myself a sexual creature. I began exploring all those carnal desires as they came to me. I just always figured I was a late bloomer, finally enjoying what people are supposed to experience in those radical 20s. Of course, I do realize the hormonal fluxes have a lot to do with it, and being in a personal place of growth that allowed me to be able to care for myself above the opinions of others. Now that I am pushing 40 I'm someone totally different than I was six years ago. I know what I like, I know who I am, and I am willing to speak my mind. Its a very liberating and aroused place to be. Cheers to our fourties! ~the laundry goddess

There are TONS of great sex scenes in not so sexy movies, almost too many to recount. For overall movies I'd have to agree with Hannibal that any Mickey Roarke movie is gonna walk that line between erotic and soft core... like 9 1/2 weeks with Kim Bassinger. There was a sequal, but it fell way short. Wild Orchid is totally hot, but Jackie Bisset was the older woman. Carrie Ottis played the younger woman, she and Roarke were actually dating when the film was made. Rumor has it those sex scenes were real, and therefor the film is considered potential porn by those who believe the rumors. Still exotic and erotic all the same. Also a complete agreement with Mikayla on Unfaithful. Those scenes were very intense. And being a woman in the thirty-something stage of life, I can totally relate to what that character was going through. If we step into mere sex scenes, there are these brief and wonderfully compelling scenes, like the blue lit see nothing sex scene in Top Gun that made this 17 year old girl wet her panties in 3 seconds flat. And can anyone deny the sheer debauchery in The Last Seduction with Bill Pullman and Linda Fiorentino? Something about being pinned against a chain link fence... ~the laundry goddess

thanks for the warm welcome, Tyger! I do love the name, it is one of my favorite gifts from my loves and their family. ~TLG

I'd say generally speaking I prefer vib, after all, I have two real life penises to choose from. However, the dildos we have for our strap on are not vibed, just have those nice ribs and veins which are also very nice.

I think Temtpress and I would agree with you on the rabbit, it is TOTALLY our favorite. Between the two of us, we've had three so far, the latest being the best with a nice firm shaft. The combination of internal and external sensations are without a doubt what makes our rabbit so fast and efective! ~the laundry goddess

OK, I've read a lot about threesome fantasies here, and a few that admit to enjoying their threesome indulgences... can we get specific? Anyone want to post their very favorite (or fantasical) things you can only do with three or more? Do tell if you are talking about FMF or MFM. We'll let some others share first, then we'll chime in with our favorites! ~the laundry goddess

Clitoral orgasms are never a problem either with or without a toy. I was specifically refering to orgasms without clitoral stimulation, that occur as a heightened response to vaginal thrusting. But your tip was interesting. I might try that if I ever find myself in a fix... ~TLG

I totally understand where you are coming from. It took me many, many years before I was able to have a vaginal orgasm during sex. It still is a difficult thing for me to experience and only can happen under the most unique of circumstances. This is not a failure on your part or that of the hubby, just understand everyone's body is different. For the most part I need clitoral stimulation, so one thing that helped tremendously was the purchase of a butterfly (or rose, or ladybug, they come in all different varieties). Basically you strap on or step into leg elastic that holds a small bullet or egg over your mound and clitoral area then you wear this during lovemaking. Not only are the vibes delicious, but every time hubby thrusts, it drives that sensation against you for more pleasure. It was still a clitoral orgasm, but I could achieve during penetration which was a whole new delight. This little toy had a huge impact on our sex life! Another thing I can reiterate is learning your body. For me, the ellusive vaginal orgasm only occurs with g spot stimulation, so experiement with positions that facilitate that connection. ~the laundry goddess

She's probably not as uncomfortable with herself as she is insecure about how it will be for you while you are down there. Afterall, wouldn't that be the ultimate in rejection if you went down on her and then she loved it, but you never wanted to again? What if she smells or tastes objectionable to you? All these things are playing through her mind, so I suggest you take things nice and slow with her. First thing is cleanliness. Shower with her, or enjoy a bubble bath for two. Then work on getting her really fired up. In my opinion, the more she wants to climax, the more open she'll be to letting you explore new dimensions. Also, you have to overcome her concerns about taste and smell, so why don't you try fingering her and then licking your hands telling her how good she tastes. It may take a while, but no orgasm will arrive when someone is holding back. Comfort is key here, so I suggest you take things slowly. It may take a few sessions to get there, but the rewards are worth it. ~the laundry goddess

I am firmly of the opinion that we train the people in our lives on how to treat us. Letting things go without discussion or other action will reinforce that he can get what he wants and leave you hanging. "Sometimes" a man's organsm can be so powerful that it shuts off their common sense. Might I suggest that on the occassions you are interested, you adopt an "I cum first" approach. Then when you are realing in the afterglow, you can please him and he is then welcome to shift down out of his sex drive having both of you be satisfied. ~the laundry goddess