Avalon616

I know it's rather cliche, but I'm a big fan of using Yellow for slow down, and Red for stop. I like having the option of an intermediate phrase, so that the person in charge of the action can stop the particular action they're doing without breaking the scene completely. I've never actually had to use my safe words. I'm not sure if it's a good thing that my partners know where my limits are, or if it's a bad thing that no one's tested them!!

To quote Wikipedia- "Polyamory [...] is the desire, practice, or acceptance of having more than one loving, intimate relationship at a time with the full knowledge and consent of everyone involved. " I consider myself polyamorous because I can see myself falling in love with someone other than my partner, and still be fully in love with my partner. Open relationships usually just refer to the people having sex with other people, not having a loving relationships. I would love to have a girlfriend, and not just a sex partner, as well, I just haven't met any women recently I could develop a relationship with. He SAYS he is open to me doing so, but he honestly doesn't know if he'll get jealous or freak out, because he's never been in that situation before. Being poly doesn't mean being in one big group. While Triads are common (3 people all dating each other), it's also common to have people having separate partners completely. There are many many different ways to be poly- once again the handy resource Wikipedia: Forms of polyamory include: # Polyfidelity, which involves multiple romantic relationships with sexual contact restricted to specific partners in a group (which may include all members of that group). # Sub-relationships, which distinguish between "primary" and "secondary" relationships (e.g. most open marriages). # Polygamy (polygyny and polyandry), in which one person marries several spouses (who may or may not be married to, or have romantic relationships with, one another). # Group relationships and group marriage, in which all consider themselves associated to one another, popularized to some extent by Robert A. Heinlein (in novels such as Stranger in a Strange Land, Time Enough For Love, Friday, and The Moon Is a Harsh Mistress). Also works by Robert Rimmer, and Starhawk in her books The Fifth Sacred Thing (1993) and Walking to Mercury (1997). # Networks of interconnecting relationships, where a particular person may have relationships of varying degrees of importance with various people. # Mono/poly relationships, where one partner is monogamous but agrees to the other having outside relationships. # So-called "geometric" arrangements, which are described by the number of people involved and their relationship connections. Examples include "triads" and "quads", along with "V" and "N" geometries. A triad could be either a V or a triangle. " The last one was what Mr. Big was referring to with the V versus Triangle. If it turns out my man can't handle me loving someone else, so be it. At this point I'm sure I want to spend the rest of my life hearing about his day and spending time with him. While I believe life can be enriched my multiple loving relationships, I don't think that experience is worth destroying the amazing relationship I have now. I would LOVE a triad. Ahh, the elusive live-in bisexual female. And after talking to him, he seems open to the idea. He's definitely poly-friendly, but he's just not sure if he can handle doing it. My big fear is that he can't, and it all blows up. That is the last thing I want.

Hey Mikayla, I really enjoy the articles you write in general, and I'm glad you tackle some of the more esoteric topics such as BDSM. As someone deeply involved in the BDSM culture, I always love it when educated people put out informative essays on things, and this essay on fetishism elucidates many of the common misconceptions surrounding it. Thank you for that. However, I did notice that you put it a few judgments in this essay regarding different paraphila and fetishes. While personally I may concur with some of your opinions, I don't think it's appropriate in an article with the pretext of educating to express them. In the scene it's common courtesy not to criticize others as long as it's legal. While obviously this is a different venue, I just think you have obvious professionalism and education in your writing, and I would appreciate you carrying that to a fuller extent. Thanks again for posting essays on non-traditional topics. ~Avalon

So I've been in a steady relationship with a man for over 2 years now, and we've been living together for about 6 months. Our relationship with each other has few rough spots, if any: the sex is fantastic, we laugh together constantly and share hobbies, and we generally don't fight about financials or anything! However, I do foresee a possible issue for the future: I'm polyamorous, and he's not. He says he's 100% ok with me dating other people, and that he's just not interested. He loves it when I bring women home for sex (I generally only date women, I'm not really interested in men, he was a fluke), and we have had some fantastic threesomes. I've dated a few women on my own as well, and it hasn't been a problem. After our dates, I would come home and share all the lurid details, and he'd get all steamed up as well. However, those few dating experiences never really went anywhere beyond a few dates or hot sex, so it never got into a realm I was concerned about. He and I are pretty heavily into the BDSM scene as well. Recently, we've joined some new local social BDSM groups, and I have met a lot of women who want to sleep with me. While I know he's fine with that, I'm worried what will happen if I develop serious feelings for any of them. I have talked about all this with him multiple times, and his main answer is: "I honestly don't know how I'll feel until I'm in the situation." I don't think that's an unfair answer at all, but I'm afraid of getting involved with someone and then him getting hurt. I know other people have had this happen to them, and I'd love to hear some advice or stories about what you did.

My friends have made jokes that my vagina is made of steel. Yes, I love my power tools, but I don't use them all the time, and have had success with other vibrators. I'll dig out the Layaspot again, get some fresh batteries, give it another whirl. And hey, maybe I just got a defective model.

Thanks everyone. I'll try Aleve, see if it works better, and I'll pick up a mouth guard. I'm actually quite familiar with them since I played field hockey in high school. As soon as I can afford it, I'll get to a dentist, and check things out. Thanks again for the advice.

So, I have enjoyed giving oral sex for years. On either men or women, it's one of my favorite things to do. On the risk of sounding like a pompous ass, I'm damn good at it too- or I was, in any case. Over the past year or so I have gotten increasing jaw pain and cramping when engaged in vigorous oral activity, which is something I used to love to do with my partner. I'm pretty sure I have TMJ. Right now in my life I'm under inordinate amounts of stress, and I grind my teeth in my sleep. I also have a jaw thrust due to bad orthodontics as a kid. Using my own formidable researching skills, I know there's no easy answer to TMJ other than painkillers, stress therapy, and perhaps orthodontics. Of course, one of the things stressing me out right now is the fact I'm unemployed, and so paying for expensive medical bills is right out the window. I was hoping some of the people here might have some home remedies that help enable oral sex. My jaw just can't stay wide open for more than a minute at a time with the way things are now, though it does help when I take Ibuprofen before trying. While we love having vaginal, anal, and manual sex, we miss the oral!!

I just bought the Sensual Hot Wax kit, once it comes in the mail, I'll say how it goes. http://shop.tootimid.com/index.asp?PageAct...amp;ProdID=5772 However, I just want to reiterate the message of choose candles with low melting points! I have a high heat pain (and general pain) tolerance. My partner and I are into some pretty hardcore BDSM, though primarily he is the Dom and I am the sub. The first time we decided to switch, I pulled out some candles I had gotten from a church candle ceremony that were left over. Little did I know that these candles had an even higher melting point than house candles, so that they would burn longer!! So I'm criticizing my man for being such a baby, and not being able to take what he dishes out, till he goes, "Seriously, stop! Try some of that on your arm!" And I did. YEEOUCH!! What a spanking I got from that encounter! :-D

I have one of these, and let me just say- it sits in my toy box and never gets used. Every review I've seen of this toy praises it, which is why I'm so confused by how disappointed I was. The product claims to go from "barely noticeable" to "Wow!" For me, it went from "barely noticeable," to "That's it??!" Now, I know that I am one tough cookie, and I need some strong vibrations to get me going. But I've had a much better time from a cheap bullet than this. The shape is not bad, the vibrator certainly does have some good things to it. It has a few different settings you can cycle through, if you're into variating patterns. For those of us who like to finish off with something strong, this was not the vibrator for it. I blame it on the 2 AAA batteries- any toy that uses less than 2 AA's generally doesn't do much for me. If you're someone who's rather sensitive, and it doesn't take strong vibration to get you off, the ergonomics of this toy are really nice, and it's tiny, so it can fit between you and a partner easily. For those people who like something more diesel, I suggest skipping it.

One that always cracks me up is the Hello Kitty Vibrator And this picture of the carrot dildo on another popular sex toy site had me cracking up as well.

Hi, just wanted to say a quick hello. I was told about this site ages ago by a good friend of mine, who was stunned by you when a sex toy of hers broke, and you replaced it no questions asked. I too was blown away by the awesomeness of that, but kept forgetting to sign up until she recently came over and subscribed me to you site herself. I have to say, I have great friends! About myself, while I am young, I am a sex toy enthusiast! I have been loving toys since I was 15, and I got my gay male best friend who looked about 25 (he was 16) to sneak in to a store and buy me a pocket rocket. Now I own everything from glass dildos to high end vibrators to restraints, and quite a few things in between. Some people have a drawer for their toys- I have an entire under-the-bed box! My partner shares my enthusiasm for all things sexual, however he's not quite as adept as I am. He's slowly broken almost every single toy I own, and while he buys new ones to replace them, it's not same... Alas, it's the circle of life, I suppose. Anyways, that's just a bit about me, I look forward to meeting you all, as I've heard nothing but great things about this site.