cowgirl

For are 5th wedding anniversary I took my husband to a themed hotel. This was the room we got… And I bought this outfit… It was FUN

I’m quiet all the way around. In the bedroom there is a few moans but our house is a quiet one.

Well by the time I was 23 I had 2 sets of twins. (My boys are 7 and girls are almost 3). I was DONE so I had my tubes tied. I had c-sections so they were already in there and had them fix that. Although before that I was on the pill for two years and got pregnant with the boys (without trying) and then I was on the pill and used condoms for 3 ½ years and got pregnant again with out trying.

I think if my hubby said it to me I would die laughing!! I think it would kill the mood completely, but there’s not much talking in are bedroom. (were both kinda shy that way)

Where I am they enforce it very much. Its a $1000 if you dont have your pets registered and they get picked up. they keep track of how many pets and if you get rid of one and register another they will send you out letters until you can prove you the other one is gone. As for Horses, cows, pigs, chickens, goats there is a point system and if you have more points than your land amount allowes you get big fines.

Hypocrites...I cant stand them!

If you have raised kids (or been one), and gone through the pet syndrome, including toilet flush burials for dead goldfish, the story below will have you laughing out LOUD! Overview: I had to take my son's lizard to the vet. Here's what happened: Just after dinner one night, my son came up to tell me there was 'something wrong' with one of the two lizards he holds prisoner in his room. 'He's just lying there looking sick,' he told me. 'I'm serious, Dad. Can you help?' I put my best lizard-healer expression on my face and followed him into his bedroom. One of the little lizards was indeed lying on his back, looking stressed. I immediately knew what to do. 'Honey,' I called, 'come look at the lizard!' 'Oh, my gosh!' my wife exclaimed. 'She's having babies.' 'What?' my son demanded. 'But their names are Bert and Ernie, Mom!' I was equally outraged. 'Hey, how can that be? I thought we said we didn't want them to reproduce,' I said accusingly to my wife. 'Well, what do you want me to do, post a sign in their cage?' she inquired (I think she actually said this sarcastically!) 'No, but you were supposed to get two boys!' I reminded her, (in my most loving, calm, sweet voice, while gritting my teeth). 'Yeah, Bert and Ernie!' my son agreed. 'Well, it's just a little hard to tell on some guys, you know,' she informed me (Again with the sarcasm!). By now the rest of the family had gathered to see what was going on. I shrugged, deciding to make the best of it. 'Kids, this is going to be a wondrous experience,' I announced. 'We're about to witness the miracle of birth..' 'Oh, gross!' they shrieked 'Well, isn't THAT just great? What are we going to do with a litter of tiny little lizard babies?' my wife wanted to know. We peered at the patient. After much struggling, what looked like a tiny foot would appear briefly, vanishing a scant second later. 'We don't appear to be making much progress,' I noted. 'It's breech,' my wife whispered, horrified. 'Do something, Dad!' my son urged.. 'Okay, okay.' Squeamishly, I reached in and grabbed the foot when it next appeared, giving it a gentle tug. It disappeared. I tried several more times with the sa me results. 'Should I call 911?' my eldest daughter wanted to know. 'Maybe they could talk us through the trauma.' (You see a pattern here with the females in my house?) 'Let's get Ernie to the vet,' I said grimly. We drove to the vet with my son holding the cage in his lap. 'Breathe, Ernie, breathe,' he urged. 'I don't think lizards do Lamaze,' his mother noted to him. (Women can be so cruel to their own young. I mean what she does to me is one thing, but this boy is of her womb, for God's sake.). The vet took Ernie back to the examining room and peered at the little animal through a magnifying glass. 'What do you think, Doc, a C-section?' I suggested scientifically. 'Oh, very interesting,' he murmured. 'Mr. and Mrs. Cameron, may I speak to you privately for a moment?' I gulped, nodding for my son to step outside. 'Is Ernie going to be okay?' my wife asked. 'Oh, perfectly,' the vet assured us.. 'This lizard is not in labor.. In fact, that isn't EVER going to happen. . . Ernie is a boy. You see, Ernie is a young male. And occasionally, as they come into maturity, like most male species, they um . . um .. . . masturbate. Just the way he did, lying on his back.' He blushed, glancing at my wife.. We were silent, absorbing this. 'So, Ernie's just . just . .. . excited,' my wife offered. 'Exactly ! ! the vet replied , relieved that we understood. More silence. Then my vicious, cruel wife started to giggle. And giggle. And then even laugh loudly. 'What's so funny?' I demanded, knowing, but not believing that the woman I married would commit the upcoming affront to my flawless manliness... Tears were now running down her face. 'It's just .that . . I'm picturing you pulling on its . . . its. . . teeny little . . ' She gasped for more air to bellow in laughter once more.. 'That's enough,' I warned. We thanked the vet and hurriedly bundled the lizard and our son back into the car.. He was glad everything was going to be okay. 'I know Ernie's really thankful for what you did, Dad,' he told me. 'Oh, you have NO idea,' my wife agreed, collapsing with laughter. Two lizards: $140. One cage: $50. Trip to the vet: $30. Memory of your husband pulling on a lizard's winkie: Priceless! Moral of the story: Pay attention in biology class. Lizards lay eggs!

Weather...I'm sick of it. A couple of weeks ago we had 3 ft of snow in one day and guess what today is...65. I wish it would stay warm and no more of the snow... (I passed the snow on to some of you)

I work (very part time) at a hardware store. This last Friday night I was helping a customer and we went to walk down one of the lighting isles and we turned the corner and there was a couple completely making out on the floor. They saw us and turned bright red! A few weekends ago are store manager was helping someone in the plumbing department and some kid (18-19). Some kid walks up to him and asked him if we sold Fallopian tubing. The manager asked him what it was used for and the kid had no idea. It took him a few sec. and the kid turned bright red and say I think I have to go now.

I need one of those! I have a neighbor that is an ass.

Anyone want more snow??? I will give it to you...for free.(It was all gone yesterday)

What scents do you prefer during sex?? or what scents make you want to have sex?? Have any of you watched Malcolm in the middle and saw the episode that Louse and Hal smell the Vanilla candle and run to there room to have sex. Yesterday I got some massage bars in the mail. I had ordered my mother in law some stuff for her birthday. While I was looking I decided to order me some stuff also. Last night I gave my hubby a massage. All I have to say is WOW! I have never had something that sent me ( and hubby) over the top like this. I has cinnamon oil, peppermint oil, and a bunch of other stuff. Well my scent would be like the fire and ice scent of cinnamon and peppermint mixed together What’s yours??

Bear Attack in Churchill , Manitoba , Canada . These are pictures of an actual polar bear attack in Churchill. These pictures were taken while people watched and could do nothing to stop the attack! Reports from the local newspaper say that the victim will make a full recovery. The photo's are below.

Come to Utah we have enough.

Its snowing here

Just some cold pictures of around here...Im sick of winter!

We've had over 70 inches of snow in the last 11 days.

Chloegirl, You know how they say girls marry there fathers. It took me 3 years to say I would marry him after he asked me. I never thought I would have married a drunk. Yes, once in a while we partied but it was only once or twice a year. But once are second baby was born in 2006 thats when he started to drink all the time and smoke. I never thought it would come to me saying, Friday just might be might braking point. Its are sons 7th birthday and I told my son he can pick anywhere to go to dinner and then were going to play mini golf. If hubbys drunk, he wont be going with us and it will be me and the kids. If he puts the kids second to the beer, we have a major problem. DADT, I dont try to say much to are friends because It always gets back to the guys. It was a bad night at work (I work retail and to set up for black friday isnt fun) then to come home and have him passed out, then to ask me where I have been when he woke up didnt help ( I had been home for 45 mins). So I sat on the computer for a few hours let it bug me to no end. Then vented. Thanks for listening to me...

About five years ago my brother went camping and when they came home it was on my bday and my brother brought me a puppy (about 6-8 weeks old) they had found out there. He was almost dead. They came acrossed others that didnt make it. I took him to the vet had him checked out and they said if he hadnt had food with in a day he would have been dead. I ended up feeding him rice for about a week so he gained a little weight and then he passed away durning the night. It was the hardest to see that little puppy suffer and not be able to help. Please if your animals not fixed, go get them fixed there is enought animals out there that need homes.

DADT, Talking only works when someone will listen and look at it from your point of view not just there own. My mr is a stubborn ass. He was raised with a dad that always got his way and he thinks he should be the same.

Some days its VERY hard to stay married...

I have to say I enjoy "Black Friday". But this year I was STUPID and went to the walmart here. I got the Xbox w/guitar hero for $199 that they had on there ad. People are nuts out there. I was glad that there was a line in the back of the walmart and we had to pay for them back there. By the time I was out of that line it was packed you couldnt move to get out of the store. (that was the only thing I got on friday)

I get blown off often... Mostly the nights I have to work until 10pm and he is way to drunk when I get home (like tonight... ) thats when I get told he is to tired or he will just lay there and act like he is asleep until I stop trying to wake him up with playing with him. But when I have been up all the night before with the kids and tell him I just want to sleep I get called a wimp. I know how you fell mine is just beer related...

wow...milk here is only 2.00

There is some drs out there that only see people that are sick in the morning and shots in the afternoon. (thats how mine is) Also my sons heart dr only sees kids in the morning. So that dosent always work to do it after school.