Members mickey2076 Posted September 24, 2009 Members Report Share Posted September 24, 2009 Hi everyone, Im new to the site,but it seems really great..and alot of nice people to give advice...Anyhow,I have a bit of an embarassing question but what he heck,I have begun dating a very great and beautiful woman about 3 months ago but the problem is that when we make love she just doesnt find my size satisfying,she was in a long term relationship prior to me and her ex was quite large......She isnt trying to be mean or nasty,but we are looking for perhaps a book or dvd that may cover the topic of compensating for a small size....it is something I have always struggled with in the past,but I really dont want it to become an issue in our relationship....any help would be great...Thanks so much Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members ladylove Posted September 24, 2009 Members Report Share Posted September 24, 2009 I'm not a Dr. but the va-ja-ja is just a muscle and should accommodate you no matter your size. I strongly suggest your partner start doing some/more kegels to tighten and strengthen her muscles. However below is a cute site that will give you hint's on what positions are best to make it most or your package for both of you.Position finderHave Fun! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members sun_flower969 Posted September 25, 2009 Members Report Share Posted September 25, 2009 I'm not a Dr. but the va-ja-ja is just a muscle and should accommodate you no matter your size. I strongly suggest your partner start doing some/more kegels to tighten and strengthen her muscles.Hmmm I'd be careful in suggesting that!!! You don't want to insult the poor girl!!! Kegels schmegels! I NEVER do them and I have no problem! My husband is about average, and I have toys that are substantially girthier and longer. I can still take him (*ahem*) and be fully satisfied if not more!!I'm not saying women shouldn't do them but it's not imperative!! The vagina naturally tightens up during arousal, your size probably isn't as relevant as maybe different shape, (everyone is different if only slightly right?) and level of arousal. Maybe she needs more clitoral stimulation during intercourse too...Definitely try new positions, like LL said! It's all about finding how you click together. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members mickey2076 Posted September 25, 2009 Author Members Report Share Posted September 25, 2009 thanks, I defintley will try.I always make sure to massage her and give plenty of foreplay before hand...For her the problem is she just eenjoys deeper penetration during intercourse..I have looked into some of the toys on this site,and that may be a good solution as well....thanks so much guys Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members leslieanne Posted September 26, 2009 Members Report Share Posted September 26, 2009 Couple of comments about Kegels - it's a good idea for all women to do them - particularly if they have delivered a baby vaginally. Kegals not only strengthen the muscles of the pelvic floor they also decrease the possibility of of urinary incontinence. In addition when your pelvic floor muscles are in good shape you can contract and relax them during intercourse which often provides increased sensation for your partner and for some women increases the vaginal sensations they have during intercourse. If you are in your 30's issues related to urinary incontinence are probable uncommon - however the number of women who experience problems with urinary incontinence increases with age - have your pelvic muscles in good shape works to your advantage as you move into your 40's and into your menopausal years. As is often the case a bit of prevention goes a long way.Kegals are simple to do - can be done at any time - whilie you're sitting and watching TV, driving in the car, sitting at your desk at work or while you are on the computer. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tyger Posted September 26, 2009 Report Share Posted September 26, 2009 Never be embarrassed, ok? You are who you are, and your cock is your cock, so you shouldn't feel bad or apologetic for it.I would suggest that she do more Kegel exercises too. The vagina IS a muscle, and can be worked out, just like any other muscle. Don't expect Arnold-SwartzenvajAhJah, but, it can definitely make her more sensitive and stronger *down there*.Toys are a fun additive in the bedroom, and I fully advocate them for that. However, if you are physically able to make love to her, don't use the toys as a "make up" for anything you feel you're lacking. Because, if you do that, you won't feel adequate enough to make love to her solo, and that detracts from the closeness you both should be feeling.I would definitely recommend you look up some positions that are great for deeper penetration, like her on top, doggie style, and reverse cowgirl.I will say this too, I was in a long-term relationship with a guy who was, well Italian, and he was rather large. Then I got together with my ex-husband. Yes, for a while I felt a difference, but after a while, I grew accustomed to him. And everything was fine that way. So, don't worry, and don't let the fact that she had a larger man in her for a while bug you. After all, HE is the EX now! Size isn't EVERYTHING! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members mickey2076 Posted September 26, 2009 Author Members Report Share Posted September 26, 2009 Thanks so much Tyger,you certainly made me feel better...I did just buy an extension device,that I think I wear like a condom,she said that she will feel more this way..(I gotta admit,though after reading your comments I kinda agree with you,as far as feeling a little resentful that she told me to buy it)..but what the heck I will give it a try. If she isnt happy with the results than we will need to have a little more communictive discussions as far as the intimacy aspect of our relationship..She does enjoy making love from behind,but it is difficult for me to stay inside her while thrusting(this has led to some awkward moments during intercourse,she gets a little frustrated and has said a few things in the heat of the moment that she later apologized for)....But where there is a will there is a way...thanks again,and thanks to too timid for the great products Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members thurisas Posted September 27, 2009 Members Report Share Posted September 27, 2009 You said yourself that you've had an issue with your size for a long time now. Part of your problem could possibly be the lack of confidence that comes with such thoughts. You are who you are and confidence goes a long way. Also, from what I've read, you need to really open up constructive communication with your partner. As it stands now you're feeling resentful, she's letting you know she's unfulfilled which double whammies the confidence that you'll need to be able to work well in the bedroom. You both need to get out what you need to say and you need to do it in a respectful manner in a non-sexual situation.Randy. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members crossroads123 Posted September 28, 2009 Members Report Share Posted September 28, 2009 Welcome aboard. I think that perhaps you have a confidence problem. By using and extender and a rubber you are trying to be someone you are not. I think if you two have any real future together it woulfd have to be built on accepting each other as you are. Just my $.02 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members garry Posted September 28, 2009 Members Report Share Posted September 28, 2009 Welcome aboard. I think that perhaps you have a confidence problem. By using and extender and a rubber you are trying to be someone you are not. I think if you two have any real future together it woulfd have to be built on accepting each other as you are. Just my $.02I'm going to have to agree with that statement. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members mickey2076 Posted September 28, 2009 Author Members Report Share Posted September 28, 2009 Thanks guys..I think You are 100 percent right...had a pretty good talk last night about it,and I think we were heading in 2 different directions anyhow...Thanks again to all who replied Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members ladylove Posted September 29, 2009 Members Report Share Posted September 29, 2009 Thanks guys..I think You are 100 percent right...had a pretty good talk last night about it,and I think we were heading in 2 different directions anyhow...Thanks again to all who repliedSorry to hear things didn't work out for you. It may be for the best. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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