Newbie jn_hatfield Posted July 31, 2007 Newbie Report Share Posted July 31, 2007 Okay, first time visiting and posting here. I've been married for 3 years and we waited until we were married to have sex so he is the only one I've had sex with. Although I can't exactly say we didn't do everything else beside intercourse before marriage. So just about everytime we are intimate, it takes alot of work on my end to have an orgasm. I pretty much tense up and concentrate really hard until it happens. When I do this is usually only take a few minutes to achieve orgasm, but my whole body is pretty sore. If I don't do this it would take much, much longer, probably 1/2 to an hr. to reach orgasm. I'm wondering if there is anything that I can do differently so that my husband can take on the whole workload and I can just sit back and relax without feeling like his hand is going to fall off from taking so long to reach orgasm. We have a 1 year old and I'm 8 months pg. so our sex life could really use some reviving. Thanks for any suggestions! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Deveninny Posted July 31, 2007 Members Report Share Posted July 31, 2007 Okay, first time visiting and posting here. I've been married for 3 years and we waited until we were married to have sex so he is the only one I've had sex with. Although I can't exactly say we didn't do everything else beside intercourse before marriage. So just about everytime we are intimate, it takes alot of work on my end to have an orgasm. I pretty much tense up and concentrate really hard until it happens. When I do this is usually only take a few minutes to achieve orgasm, but my whole body is pretty sore. If I don't do this it would take much, much longer, probably 1/2 to an hr. to reach orgasm. I'm wondering if there is anything that I can do differently so that my husband can take on the whole workload and I can just sit back and relax without feeling like his hand is going to fall off from taking so long to reach orgasm. We have a 1 year old and I'm 8 months pg. so our sex life could really use some reviving. Thanks for any suggestions! Toys? Have any? Using them during foreplay "warms ya up." I find that starting foreplay hours before my S.O. and I begin the act (whispering in her ear, touching her softly\sensually... she usually quite lubed up and already thinking alot about "her" orgasm. Keith Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Newbie lafalot247 Posted August 2, 2007 Newbie Report Share Posted August 2, 2007 hi. i am new here too! I have the same problem. takes me a while too. My husband would laugh at me when i worry about his hands falling off.. I suggest that you try not to worry about him and be selfish(in a good way) He was the one that suggested it to me, and it really works. Put it in your head that it's all about you and it should become easier. I found that i relaxed more and didn't worry so much about the orgasm. Now after a short time I have been able to just enjoy him and what he does and now before i know it, i am going CRAZY! Our normal escapades usually last more than an hour and always reach satisfaction. I haven't yet reached that G-spot orgasm yet, but have experienced some pretty amazing orgasms. moral of my story? Stop worrying, start to just enjoy him. It may surprise you! As for the pregnant part, set the stage and surprise him. candles, toys, music, and spontanous play. the best part of being pregnant is you have one hell of an excuse to try different positions! So relax, don't worry about how long it takes. learn how to let go. It's a learning process that i am trying to figure out too..Good luck! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members MystryKitten Posted August 2, 2007 Members Report Share Posted August 2, 2007 Try not to consentrate too hard! Relax, take deep breaths, and just let the orgasm come to you! I find that if I consentrate too hard to reach orgasm, it just wont happen. It takes me a while to orgasm to, sometimes its just takes longer then we would like. Make sure your hubby does the best he can to get you to orgam, tease you, give you oral, maybe you can even tell him to rub you 'faster' or 'slower' while he is giving you a hand job. As what Keith said, toys do help and can help you reach orgasm faster! I've been able to reach orgasm in under 5min with a toy! On the nights when it is taking me forever to orgasm, my SO will start out with a hand job and end with oral which really gets me going! Relax, take your time, and explore the possiblilies. Have fun =]~MK Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tyger Posted August 2, 2007 Report Share Posted August 2, 2007 Welcome to the forum!Please take some time and read the past posts, cuz not only is there some great advise & ideas by many people, but you will also see that you are not alone! And, the Sex Education tab has a lot of great articles of sexual issues and ideas on how to spark everything up.BTW, a half hour to reach an orgasm, with foreplay, really isn't that long of a time! Some women can't at all, or it really takes a long time. Women are more emotional sexually, they have to relax, and let go, and FEEL loved and connected to their lover. Sometimes that takes more time than others. If you may want a quick release from time to time, there's nothing wrong with pleasuring yourself, having a self-quickie. Or, teasing and flirting with your lover all day long via phone calls, kinky love-notes, or even mentally exciting yourself-thinking about what you want to do with/to your lover when you're back together!Anyway, have fun and enjoy the forum! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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