Members HornToad Posted August 5, 2007 Members Report Share Posted August 5, 2007 HelloI am married to a FANTASTIC wife. Our biggest problem is that I am a “HornToad” and she is NOT! I have reviewed many of the threads here trying to see if anyone addressed this issue. I found the article MISMATCHED MOTIVATIONS: but it did not discuss the potential of all the stuff that is available on the intranet to help “Low Libido for women”. Have any of the wonderful people on this forum found something that works to improve the libido for women? (Libido = the desire to have sex. Hopefully Frequent sex!)My wife has been to the doctor and has been on Testosterone cream. The doctor keeps increasing the dose to the point of my wife becoming “worse than Menstrual” in attitude. She became “her evil sister” until the dosage was brought back down so we know she is at a level that she can not go any higher. The doctor is stumped as He said she should have responded to this by now. I have searched the intranet but there is so much out there to choose from. And even some of the “reviews” on such “Libido increasers” are bogus and made up. One product looked “real” so she is trying “Passion rx with Yohimbe” made by “Dr. Ray Saherlian”. This has actually brought her desire UP TO “almost interested once per week”. She and I would like to see more like 3 times per week.I do not pressure her. She is a great sport in trying, and she wants to have increased desire, and sex also. We both know this would benefit our marriage and intimacy greatly if she could get her MoJo back. She is 49 and on an “anti aging regime”, with me from the same doctor that is prescribing the testosterone cream. She also takes “Trans-D Tropin cream for HGH, and vitamins, PLENTY of exercise, only 20 pounds over target weight, in FANTASTIC shape, and feels GREAT! The same doctor has ME on Testosterone cream also due to my being at the bottom of “normal range” which has made me even MORE a “HornToad” than I was. But the doctor says it will help my heart, and help me loose fat, and gain muscle mass so I am putting up with the INCREASED sexual desire! Has ANYONE tried something that actually does work?One HORNTOAD! Or is that HORNYtoad? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tyger Posted August 5, 2007 Report Share Posted August 5, 2007 I'm sure her doctor has covered most of the basics, like weight, self-esteem, thyroid, and possible mental issues. Is your wife going thru menopause? That may be the culprit too. As far as the libido increasers you can find, I have yet to find something that is reputable outside the doctor's office. Testosterone in high doses, as you and your wife found out, is an "unnatural" thing for the female body to reproduce in high doses, hence why she went all "Cybil" on you. Flirt with your wife, compliment her, help around the house, help make her feel sexy no matter what. That may help. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members thurisas Posted August 5, 2007 Members Report Share Posted August 5, 2007 I don't think there is any product out there that really works to increase libido. Having been in retail pharmacy as a store manager for years and years, I have to say that I've seen it all come through. The fact is that some of these products may have the latest "in" herb or vitamin or whatever to increase sexual desire but they're almost "out" again as soon as they hit the market because a new "in" thing supposedly works even better. The problem is that most of this stuff is probably psychological. You see, these items aren't really controlled very well, what few trials that are done are clinical ones and are usually funded by the marketing department of the company that wants to sell them.I think you might benefit in a shift in the way of thinking for you and your wife. It shouldn't be "I want sex" and "no I'm not in the mood." It should be more along the lines of flirting throughout the day, working her into the mood, and priming her for the playtime later. Continue as you are, though, not being pushy. Flirt with the idea that you may still have to satisfy yourself that night. With a bit of luck and skill, though, you won't have to.Thurisas. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members krisleightate Posted August 5, 2007 Members Report Share Posted August 5, 2007 I agree with Thurisas and Tyger. Flirt and make her feel sexy all day not just when you want to do something. Women get all "hot and bothered" when their SO takes an interest in them all day. Just don't push it. It could be that she is feels like she should be ready for you when ever you want and puts pressure on herself to be ready. That kind of pressure can kill a woman's libido. So really just relax and have fun. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members cdwaldorf Posted August 6, 2007 Members Report Share Posted August 6, 2007 I don't have a quick fix but there are several things that has helped increase my libido. First thing is that I fantasize about my husband all day. I usually pick out a great sexual encounter and I remember everything about it ex. the flirting during the day, the certain smells, the feelings of pleasure........ This helps keep my mind on sex. I also had to come to love my body. I have had three kids and lets face it I did not feel like a sexual being. I felt more like a nurse maid. I had to embrace my curves and my sexuality. I had to find myself sexy and attractive. Yes I am a mother but I am also a wife. My advice would be to stop fixating on how much sex you are NOT having. When you and your wife get together than just make it a wonderful experience and just relax and have fun with it. I can imagine their is a lot of pressure for each one of you to perform and that can cause a lot of anxiety and sexual frustration. Make your goal to please your wife (and sometimes that may not be sex) like a massage, a romatic bubble bath, cleaning of the house. This is usually the areas that will leave deposits and will lead to her wanting to "please you". I hope this helps. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members HornToad Posted August 7, 2007 Author Members Report Share Posted August 7, 2007 Thank You all for the great replies! I guess there really is no such thing as a safe legal “Spanish fly” out there on the market. That is good to know so I can stop looking for such a thing that is not in existence yet. I guess if they ever do come up with something that increases a womans libido it will be as big of news as Viagra was when it first came out. Please let me know if someone HAS heard of a product that works. I will continue to “work” on the mental, emotional, and loving part of the relationship, as I always have. HornToad Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members ToyQueen Posted August 7, 2007 Members Report Share Posted August 7, 2007 There is a product out there called Avlimil. My doctor actually gave me a one month sample. It helped the first month I took it, but then seemed to lose it's effectiveness. But it works wonders for some women. It is herbal. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members HornToad Posted August 8, 2007 Author Members Report Share Posted August 8, 2007 Sorry Howard4570 My refrence to "spanish Fly" was only meant as a joke. I want something that would LEGALLY, SAFELY, increase my wifes libido, over time, for a long time. No intention of saying I wanted something to knock my wife out for sex. I HAVE heard of those types of DRUGS and would never use them. My wife and I were looking for advise on products that are prescribed or over the counter type medications that people have used and found to actually work. Like the refrence to Avlimil, but something that would continue to work for a longer time than one month. I figure if no one here has found anything, than it is no use looking! HornToad Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members ToyQueen Posted August 9, 2007 Members Report Share Posted August 9, 2007 You could try the Avlimil. It worked for me for about a month. I believe my issues were more emotional from being with an abusive spouse, and that was the biggest reason it didn't work for me. My sister used it for a much longer time period and loved it the whole time she used it. Lots of women swear by it. Nothing is a cure all. Your wife could talk to her doctor about it. (S)He may have other ideas. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members HornToad Posted September 2, 2007 Author Members Report Share Posted September 2, 2007 Hello AllI wanted to give an update to this post. It has been near a month since I started this thread and the Passion RX with Yohombie made by Dr. Ray Saherlian IS working!My wife ENJOYS and DESIRES sex at least once a week now. What is even more amazing is that she is enjoying anal sex! That is when she is able to obtain her orgasm. She has never gotten the big O from vaginal sex, only when I go down on her, (Orally, when EVER she asks me to, I am more than willing! ) So for her to obtain this BIG Orgasm while having anal sex is a huge PLUS for both of us. The fact that SHE wants it, is even a bigger plus! I suggested changing from the Passion RX with yohombie and trying something else and she said “NO WAY, I like the way that stuff is making me feel! “ So to those who are trying to increase libido you might want to give Passion RX a try. My wife is going to try increasing to 1 & ½ casuals per day, 2 days on and 2 days off, to see if it helps even more!!! HornToad Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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