Newbie openminded Posted August 11, 2007 Newbie Report Share Posted August 11, 2007 Do you think when you are married or in a serious relationship you should infrom your SO of things going on in your life outside the home? For example, if you are planning a possible business trip (even though it hasn't been approved yet) or taking a day off from work. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members thurisas Posted August 11, 2007 Members Report Share Posted August 11, 2007 If you're in a relationship of any kind, I would think you would want your SO to know that you're going to be gone for any length of time. When in a relationship you have certain obligations to that other person to help make your plans fit around theirs. Business trips happen, but you should be up front that this is what it is. I personally can't picture a day off where I wouldn't be spending it with my wife, but that's just me as she is my best friend. The biggest thing is that you don't want to give the impression of deception. Perception is reality in the absence of truth. If your SO calls your office while you're away or out playing, alarms will likely be ringing in thier head if you weren't up front with them. Just be up front with them and all should be well, I'm sure.Thurisas. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Valntyn Posted August 11, 2007 Members Report Share Posted August 11, 2007 When I read your question, the first thing that popped into my head was, "Why wouldn't you?" What do you talk about with your SO, if not things that happen day-to-day with the two of you?My husband and I talk about everything... he IS my best friend, so talking comes naturally... there's nothing to hide... I'm excited to tell him everything and anything, from a silly dream I had, to the grocery list I'm making, to finding out what happened at the water cooler at his job. It doesn't matter what we talk about; it's the sharing between two loved ones that makes it for me.So, while it's not IMPERATIVE that you tell your SO that you're going on a business trip (for example), unless you're planning on leaving for your trip before she wakes up in the morning and you're not ever coming back.... why wouldn't you tell her? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tyger Posted August 11, 2007 Report Share Posted August 11, 2007 When reading this, I too thought "why wouldn't you?" I know some mundane boring things get lost, because they're not important. However, as was mentioned before, if you are going to go away for a day, even if it's a business trip, you should always let your SO's know where you will be. Especially in cases of emergencies. I'm not sure which situation you're in, but, I am thinking you're not the one being secretive, but the one being kept in the dark? I could be wrong....If you feel that you just need to go away for a day, for some personal time, tell your SO, nicely, that you want some YOU time, and let them know where you will be.If you start keeping things from each other, then doubts and accusations can and WILL form, and if there's no trust in any relationship, then there is NO relationship. The key to maintaing trust is honest and OPEN communication. Whether you or your SO is staying hush hush, then, there are probably some issues there, IMO.Just because something goes on "outside" the home you share, doesn't mean that you shouldn't let them know, especially in cases where you'll be absent from where you usually are.Planning vacations should encorporate the both of you (if you're living together or even in a "going steady" situation). I mean, vacations are for relaxing and spending some time together. You also have to take into consideration cut off dates for vacation windows, and what may be going on in your life, to possibly take advantage of vacation time, such as a wedding out of state, or a visiting relative. You know when you have vacation time acrued, and when the cut off/black out dates are, so there really is no reason for "OMG!! I need to make a decision on my vacation NOW!!" situation. Your SO should always be kept informed of what's going on, since it affects them too. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members jesso Posted August 11, 2007 Members Report Share Posted August 11, 2007 Not sure if you are asking the question or seeking responses generated in lieu of something your SO has upset you with. It seems as though for me it's pretty common to automatically generate your calendar for someone you're in a serious relationship with. Your plans generally involve them most of the time in some sort of connection. If its an unplanned day off maybe not. But a trip? That seems weird that it wouldn't come up in general conversation. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members krisleightate Posted August 12, 2007 Members Report Share Posted August 12, 2007 Honesty is always the best policy. Tell the truth always. And don't lie by omission either Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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