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innocent

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I am new to this forum and hope there is help out there. I am happily married to a wonderful man. We have an amazing life together. My problem is I think I am falling for someone else. That someone happens to be my boss. I cannot stop thinking of him. Even when I am with my husband. What do I do? Would it be wrong to persue this?

Innocent

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If you're thinking about pursuing another man, then I would have to venture a guess that your life with your husband isn't as great as you are saying it is. Don't get me wrong, it's fine and natural to have feelings for and fantasies about other people, but the fact that you are thinking of acting upon it is the real problem. What is it that your husband isn't providing for you that your boss could? Is it worth it to throw away the life you have now for the life that may or may not be possible with this other man? Are you willing to deal with upheaval in both your personal and professional life?

Have you thought about the professional ramifications? Most companies have very strict rules on romantic behavior between coworkers and especially between management and their subordinates. In fact, sexual harrassment doesn't even necessarily have to be between the two people involved in a relationship if it is making a third party(say, a co-worker) uncomfortable. Consider it well before you take that step.

The cornerstone of any relationship is trust and communication. It would probably be best if you started talking to your husband to find out where the real root of the problem lies and whether or not you want to continue your relationship with him. You should absolutely do this before you even consider pursuing another man.

Thurisas.

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I agree with Thurasis and Howard. You have to work out whatever problem you have with your husband or end it before persuing anyone. I would be hesistant to end my marraige b/c of a infatuation with your boss. Plus you never even mention if the boss even interested in you on a more deeper level. I would then ask myslef what kind of person would make advances towards a married women. That would be a big warning flag for me. One thing I will promise you is that the grass is not greener on the other side and this will have a devastating effect on your marriage and your job. It just really doesn't sound worth it to me. Do not think with your emotions.

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  • 1 month later...
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Have you asked yourself what it is about this other person that you think you are falling for....Why it is you are falling? Is it really him? or could it be the excitement of something new. Change of pace. Do you say everything is great and the person you are married to is great also, and you are questioning yourself, as to why if you are in the perfect relationship that you could even fall for someone, and they even caught your eye? You said you can't stop thinking about him. I have to ask what it is you think about? Is there sexual thoughts and just imagining what it would be like and any fantasies such as in his office sexual encounters. Because that alone not meaning him, but the excitement, change, fantasy, something new, non predictable, possibly could really be what is going on inside. If you do imagine such things with this other(your boss).... Imagine and try the things you dream of excites you, desire and if you want him to surprise you in any way, like him( husband , coming home early, not telling you and coming in quietly, come up to you telling you not to speak and start softly kissing you on the neck and start unclothing you---etc. Try with your husband the things you think about with this other man. Then take it from there to see if any feelings change///shift.Just because your husband does not do certain things does not mean he won't

He might be too shy to and so are you thinking he is not that way or that telling him will take the excitement out of it, but that is not all true.

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To make it in simpler form and understanding where I was going with that. We all especially women have a favorite love story movie as men call chick flicks. What happens when we watch it over and over after so many years. It loses our attention. We start to lose interest and cannot hold our attention like it use to, but we do however still love it. There is something very special about that movie and always will be.--but the movie is predictable, we become distracted easily in the middle of the movie even if you hear one of your childrens radio playing you listen to the song playing which normally you would'nt of even noticed it before. so it's not the actors that need changing it's the movie and details within the movie and then you have a new favorite movie you are in love with. that's it all in a nutshell.

hope this helps you.

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  • 4 years later...
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Bluelotusparties - every time I see your name I think "Blueloosepanties" And when I see LadyLoves name that damn Lou Rawls song gets in my head and won't go away. How did you choose your name?

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Hi there!

I think that is really wrong. I am not judging anyone but the fact that you are here seeking advise I can say that you CANNOT say you are happily married if you are falling for someone who happens to be your boss.

I think you must not entertain the feeling for it may grow. focus on your work and the feeling will automatically vanish in time.

Goodluck!

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Bluelotusparties - every time I see your name I think "Blueloosepanties" And when I see LadyLoves name that damn Lou Rawls song gets in my head and won't go away. How did you choose your name?

Hi Protege! bluelotusparties is a name of a trusted and the best adult shop in australia .. I used to shop there. Are you interested? just check their site by clicking bluelotusparties. thankyou! :)

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when I see LadyLoves name that damn Lou Rawls song gets in my head and won't go away.

:P

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