Too Big?

[masquedxangel]

Okay, so this here is an awkward question. It's also my first post of the sort so pardon me if I somehow manage to leave something out or ask the scame question that's been asked a million times. ^^;;;

I got my new (first) toy in yesterday - it's a vibe, about 6.5" long and...hmmm...1.25" diameter? Something like that. It's not HUGE but for some reason it...seems to be? I tried to use it several times, and I could literally only take maybe half of it before I seemed to hit some sort of blockade. Trying to force it in any way just hurt like hell no matter how well lubed I was so I can't figure out what the hell my issue is.

I'm a very, very small person - about 5'0" and 85 pounds - so is it possible that I literally can't take 6.5", or am I doing something wrong?

Suggestions are greatly appreciated. ^^;

[pappyld04]

Hey Mandie! By your post I see you are basically the same size as my gf. She has the same problem at times and it is more of a relaxation and lubrication thing with her. There are times that she can get hers about 3/4 of the way in and times when 1/2 would be too much. Her toys are a bit bigger than yours but she may be more accustomed to them also. I think Mikayla, Tyger, mskay, or one of the many ladies here may be a better source for you. I have noticed that if she has been reading a Letter's or watching a video for a bit to get her urge that she seems to have better penetration. You might consider starting with a smaller one until you get used to it then you should be able to enjoy the larger one. If you are not used to being penetrated or have not had sex for a while it seems to me that a woman does start tightening back up. Although it is a great thing when you do have sex again it cannot be good for you to force anything inside. As you grow more accustomed to your toy(s) things should get better. I hope you come to find that it was money well spent. Noone should be without at least a dozen or so. Have fun, relax, do not force anything, and you should be able to take a toy that size. I know you didn't say anything about trouble taking a partner and I'm thinking there is not a lot of difference other than size and probably stiffness. Some toys may not have a lot of give to them.

[ToyQueen]

I'm sure that others will have answers for you, but here is a woman's point of view.

I wouldn't worry about how far you can insert the vibrator. Most of the nerve endings are in the bottom third of the vagina. I would just use it as you can. My thought is that as you relax more you will be able to insert it farther, but as long as you are comfortable and enjoying it, I wouldn't worry.

Good luck!

[Mikayla1]

I am going to ask a question....are you a virgin? If so, you could be hitting your hymen (which contrary to popular belief is NOT an intact piece of skin in most women) but might feel like it is when having sex inititally. Also, have you had a pelvic exam by your OBGYN? If so, and she could get the speculum in, then you are most likely just nervous about the toy - and need more lubrication and relaxation. IF you have not had an exam, by your age you should have, so go to your OB and get examined.

There are some conditions where women have shortened vaginal canals (so Howard, yes, she could be too small to fit the LENGTH of the vibrator- the width is something different entirely). This is uncommon - but more common in petite women. There is only a finite amount of space there - and with shorter women, it can be much shorter.

I also agree if everything else checks out, don't worry so much about how far it goes in - you will get the most sensation through clitoral play and initial insertion.

If you continue to have this problem, talk to your doctor about it. He or she will be able to better direct you!

[Willow~]

Sometimes I have that problem, I have a tipped uterus and find if I can slide the vibe below and under it, I'm good to go. Maybe this will help you.

[sweetnothings]

Sometimes I have that problem, I have a tipped uterus and find if I can slide the vibe below and under it, I'm good to go. Maybe this will help you.

This could be it. I also have a tipped uterus. Even tampons only go so far and then they bend until I can find the correct angle. A doctor could tell you if you in fact have this. Rest assured though...my husband always seems to find his way in and 4 kids found their way out just fine. It also could be just you tensing your muscles up.

[thinker]

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[masquedxangel]

Oops; I wandered away from the forum and forgot to double-check my post. Thanks for all the replies! I'll keep trying, I suppose, I was just very surprised that the vibe didn't fit, since it didn't look all that big. And if it doesn't...then I guess when I get married I better choose someone small. 0_0;;;

As for virginity, yes, I am a virgin still. I haven't had a pelvic exam yet because I was told by my mom's Gynecologist that it's not necessary for me to have an exam until I'm sexually active. And honestly I'm agonizingly shy and I can barely stand to change my shirt in front of someone, so any time I consider going in for a pelvic exam I get pretty thoroughly freaked out. x.x;

[Mikayla1]

Hi Mandie,

Let me give you a word of advice: go get a pelvic exam. Most doctors recommend that ALL young women have a pelvic exam 6 months after first intercourse, OR age 18, whichever comes first. SOme gynecologists will recommend by age 16. You are 18 now, and you should go get a baseline Pap and begin your yearly routine. SHyness aside, gynecologists have seen thousands upon thousands of vaginas, and truly yours is just one in the crowd! While no woman LIKES going to her yearly, I suggest you go and get it over with.

Also, since you are a virgin, this is where you may be having the discomfort wtih the toys. Just tread carefully and slowly if you want to continue to insert your toys!

[Tyger]

I will also echo Mikayla's recommendation that you go and get checked out with your first PAP exam. They're not overly fun, kinda embarrassing the first time since you don't normally stick your legs in the air, but, after a while, you get use to it, and it's really not a biggie. Since you're sexually curious, you really should have this done, and possibly look into forms of birth control as well. Safe sex is happy sex! And, remember, the Pill, or other "women only" forms, don't protect against STDs, condoms are the better bet for that.

As far as having difficulty with the vibrator, if you're not thrusting hard, and, assuming that you haven't already torn it, you may be hitting your hymen, especially if you feel a slight pressure when it goes up inside of you. Chances are, is that, since you ARE in fact, using insertable toys, then you've probably already torn it, or it was already torn (it can happen with strenuous activities, bike riding, horseback riding, and other activities).

Be comforted in knowing that the cervix is, indeed, stretchy, because, of course, it's designed not only to accomodate a male's genitals, but to push a baby out. There may be some slight discomfort when a man goes inside of you, either if it's because it's your first time (my first was only 6", but he felt HUGE), or that the man may be larger than what you may be use to. But, it will stretch out, and retract.

If you're insistent on using a insertable sex toy, let me recommend that you get a toy made of silicone or jelly. They're bendable, and, if you have a tipped uterus (which can affect the angle of the cervix), these sorts of toys will bend and contort to your specific body easier. AND they do have several that have vibrations in them too! Plus, since you're experimenting, you're probably not relaxing as much as you should. This takes time, and patience. Just try and do some deep breathing, and try to relax more.

[masquedxangel]

Tyger - No worries as far as the sexual stuff, I have absolutely no interest in having any sort of sexual relationship with someone before we're married. I was raised very strongly against that, and that's one of the few things that has stuck with me even though I'm not religious. So I don't need, nor do I want, birth control and...well...I guess I could buy a box of condoms for my own amusement...xDDD

As far as the PAP...-sigh-...you'd think with as advanced as we are, we'd freakin' have some way to like...do your own or something. Lol. I suppose I'll have to go in eventually; probably when I visit my parents at some point, since I don't care to pay for the appointment (yay, my parents are handling medical stuff 'til I'm 21...go college!) and I don't have my insurance card, my mom still does. xD

And as for the toy I guess I'll work my way back up to trying it again; now I'm too intimidated by it. xD I was just worried that there was some reason beyond it being something new/Hymen being in the way. I shall see, I suppose. =)

Thanks for all the responses, I appreciate it.