Members mystofpric Posted June 21, 2008 Members Report Share Posted June 21, 2008 Maybe he just needs time to think it over? I can't see how anyone could read that and not need time to think about how to make it work. But I also couldn't see how anyone could tak offense. Hope all works out well and I'm looking forward to hearing that everything is amazing now. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members whitefang2002 Posted June 21, 2008 Members Report Share Posted June 21, 2008 Your letter got me thinking I need to do one for my hubby to make him understand things more.....just not sure if I have the guts to do it like you did! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Amylynn920 Posted June 21, 2008 Author Members Report Share Posted June 21, 2008 Don't know what it is maybe he is processing, maybe just doesn't care. I don't know. All I know is I will never put my thoughts out there on the table again. It didn't bring discussion, or concern. All it did was make me feel like a needy little girl and I just don't like those feelings. I don't like them at all. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members sun_flower969 Posted June 21, 2008 Members Report Share Posted June 21, 2008 Like you have to beg... That is a BAD feeling! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members chloegirl Posted June 21, 2008 Members Report Share Posted June 21, 2008 Aiden you are the guttsiest most giving person I've met! I know how opening up and laying your innermost thoughts out there is terrifiying and when the response back is not what you wanted it makes you feel that much more foolish and vulnerable, but don't be sorry....you have nothing to be embarrassed about. I think alot of guys (mine's one too) just don't have it in them to think and process on a really deep level...they just want to keep everything on a kind of superficial level 'cause they don't want to take the time to really look too deeply at themselves and put forth the effort to really change....it's kind of like "this is as far as I'm gonna give and it should be enough for you" mentality. siigghh. It's disappointing but still if most of it's good than I guess we're still doing ok! You are amazing girl...don't let it get you down! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members hot4hubby Posted June 23, 2008 Members Report Share Posted June 23, 2008 Thats was wonderfully put. I plan to write a letter like that to my husband.Great job Aiden Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members vanilla_bean Posted June 27, 2008 Members Report Share Posted June 27, 2008 I truly appreciate how much it took to write this letter. Any response? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Amylynn920 Posted June 27, 2008 Author Members Report Share Posted June 27, 2008 Yes we talk Vanilla. It's hard getting him to open up. Baby steps I suppose. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members blewits Posted July 14, 2008 Members Report Share Posted July 14, 2008 Wow Aiden, I AM crying. That is such a beautiful letter. The tenderness and honesty that went into that is such a beautiful thing. Just give him time. Hopefully he will read it over and over just to absorb it all and then he will see where your heart truly is.I love that letter so much and feel inspired to write one to my husband. We will be a few thousand miles away for about 2 weeks, and what a nice surprise I could send him in his inbox! You should have no regrets in regards to that letter. I think it's incredible. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members cybele Posted July 14, 2008 Members Report Share Posted July 14, 2008 A truly beautiful, heartfelt letter. I don't know you or your relationship well, but my thoughts on his lack of reaction was that it's probably a lot to process for any man. They're not wired the same, and the powerful emotions that you brought across would daunt anyone. He's so lucky to have you and the intensity that you love him. I'm sure he knows that, even if he keeps it locked up. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Amylynn920 Posted July 14, 2008 Author Members Report Share Posted July 14, 2008 Thanks for the kind words. So much good has come of our talking over things, my issues, his feelings about my issues and our willingness to be honest and loving with each other to work to make it better. Our relationship has grown and together we work to make changes. His immense patience with me and his love for me have grounded me. Together we work every day at making us a priority. And our sex life has exploded as a result. So yes talking and caring and loving each other is a really good thing. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members dscn Posted July 14, 2008 Members Report Share Posted July 14, 2008 sweet letter aiden very touchin. give hubby some time he hears what you are saying guys are a little slow when it comes to feeling and a letter like that will put in him a shell because it was so powerful and sentimetal give him some time to process it and analze it.don't push him too much he will get back to you when he has his thoughts together right now since everyone on here is so touch and hears what you are saying and hubby is not saying nothing about it he needs some time so please be patient with him he will get back at you give him a couple of days. we take a while to process things. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members TimiDoll Posted July 16, 2008 Members Report Share Posted July 16, 2008 Ok so yea.. your letter made me cry Aiden. I admire you not only for your eloquence but also for your braveness. Since this thread is a little older, I'm hoping things have changed and he does appreciate your words for what they were meant to be now - pure love and gratefulness. I think you've inspired me and I think I will sit down in a quite moment and try to put my feelings into written words as well.. even if it's just for the sake of clearing my head and getting it all out.Aiden you're my hero, I mean it. I hope your husband can see what an amazing jewel he has in you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Amylynn920 Posted July 16, 2008 Author Members Report Share Posted July 16, 2008 Timidoll, What a sweet thing to say.Things were never "bad" in our relationship. In retrospect it was a communication problem. I assumed he knew what was wrong, and he assumed there was not much I was concerned about because I never sat down and was just open and honest about my feelings. I carried tremendous baggage from my first marriage, and it just didn't belong with this relationship. I think all of us in relationships are a constant work in progress. People can change daily on their thoughts and dreams and it's good to take the time and reconnect.My advice on the letter you need to write your husband, is that it be open, and from the heart. Don't hold things back no matter how awkward it may feel to write. This man is your partner. He WILL understand. He may be confused if you're presenting new thoughts and may wonder why nothing was said before.The purpose of mine was to put to paper how much love and respect I have for Eric. And why it was so important to me that I wanted to keep things good and make better the good things we do have. Fortunately, I am with an extremely intelligent man that respects me and considers me his closest friend too.We share things with each other we could never feel comfortable telling another. And there is no judgement, just honest discussion and working to help each other.I wish you luck in your letter, and let me know how it goes. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members TimiDoll Posted July 16, 2008 Members Report Share Posted July 16, 2008 Timidoll, What a sweet thing to say.Things were never "bad" in our relationship. In retrospect it was a communication problem. I assumed he knew what was wrong, and he assumed there was not much I was concerned about because I never sat down and was just open and honest about my feelings. I carried tremendous baggage from my first marriage, and it just didn't belong with this relationship. I think all of us in relationships are a constant work in progress. People can change daily on their thoughts and dreams and it's good to take the time and reconnect.My advice on the letter you need to write your husband, is that it be open, and from the heart. Don't hold things back no matter how awkward it may feel to write. This man is your partner. He WILL understand. He may be confused if you're presenting new thoughts and may wonder why nothing was said before.The purpose of mine was to put to paper how much love and respect I have for Eric. And why it was so important to me that I wanted to keep things good and make better the good things we do have. Fortunately, I am with an extremely intelligent man that respects me and considers me his closest friend too.We share things with each other we could never feel comfortable telling another. And there is no judgement, just honest discussion and working to help each other.I wish you luck in your letter, and let me know how it goes.I will. I might even post about it on my blog here; I just started it today =) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Amylynn920 Posted July 16, 2008 Author Members Report Share Posted July 16, 2008 I will. I might even post about it on my blog here; I just started it today =)Please do, I used to blog like a maniac. Writing helps me sort my feelings. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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