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How Can You Live With Yourself?!?!?


Guest eminatic

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Guest eminatic

well i was talking to my closest friend last night, and she mentioned she had started communicating with her ex again. he had attempted to get her to have sex and she declined, and then he tried again saying he doesnt care at all about his new gf and thats why he didnt tell her he has herpes and has unprotected sex with her. but that he cared enough to tell [my friend].

wtf? he was having unprotected sex with this girl, while fully aware that he had an STD!!!

that is BEYOND fucked up!

needless to say my friend called the girl immediately and told her to get herself tested. no word yet on the results.

but still this makes me so pissed off i would punch him in the face if i ever saw him in person! :angry: :angry: :angry:

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I'm pretty sure that's actually illegal. I'm fairly certain you are required by law to inform all your current sex partners (and future ones, before sexual contact,) of any sexually transmitted diseases you currently have, so I think since he told your friend about it and obviously knows he has it, if his gf has infact contracted it from him (Heaven forbid!) she can sue him for damages.

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Yeah, such cases are hard fought, but in this instance if your friend would be willing to testify it might make a decent case.

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needless to say my friend called the girl immediately and told her to get herself tested. no word yet on the results.

but still this makes me so pissed off i would punch him in the face if i ever saw him in person! :angry: :angry: :angry:

AWESOME! I think it is a huge sign of immaturity for him to be doing that. Oh man If I knew that dude, his reputation would be ruined! I would make sure!

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I'd hate to even guess at the number of girls that have been infected by this walking penis with ears! You should make damned sure noone you know gets with that idiot!

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I'd hate to even guess at the number of girls that have been infected by this walking penis with ears! You should make damned sure noone you know gets with that idiot!

thanks for reminding me, i think i'll add him to dontdatehimgirl.com :lol:

i think this is beyond immaturity, its just downright cruel. this is someone's LIFE and his selfishness will affect them for the rest of their days.

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Sadly not disclosing you sexual health is not against the law. Actually it is protected under the HIPPA laws. Also it would get thrown out of court as SHE made teh disicion to not use protection. I agree 100% that he SHOULD have told her, but likewise that's similar to how I got HPV, only the guy didn't know, and in this case there is no test for him so I don't blame him at all. That guy though I'd be telling every female withina 10 mile radius.

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Sadly not disclosing you sexual health is not against the law.

In most states, it is. It's called Criminal Transmission, and while it usually applies to HIV infection, I'm sure that in most cases the law would cover herpes as well, since it is also incurable... I'm not sure if curable STDs are covered or not, since they're basically never prosecuted, but I imagine if you really wanted to sue over it you could. Nobody ever does because it's cheaper to just treat the infection than to hire a lawyer.

To my knowledge no Criminal Transmission law requires you to tell your past sexual partners, but they DO require that you disclose to your current and potential future partners, so yeah, chances are if she tests positive she is well within her rights to sue his ass.

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As you just stated it is rarely if ever prosecuted for any STD short of HIV/AIDS! This one is a sure death sentence so it does get prosecuted. Perhaps it justs needs people to start pushing the laws here by suing or whatever in order to set precedence. There is always a first for things like this and this guy is a great example of the idiots out there spreading it around with no thought as to the lives he effects by his selfish and arrogant actions.

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well its not like they just started going out a week ago, they had been seeing each other for over 6 months, and having protected sex. when you factor in the human element, you think you've got a meaningful relationship going, think you can trust this person- it seems silly to demand paperwork to prove your partner is not lying about being a virgin/clean. he tricked her, plain and simple.

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well its not like they just started going out a week ago, they had been seeing each other for over 6 months, and having protected sex. when you factor in the human element, you think you've got a meaningful relationship going, think you can trust this person- it seems silly to demand paperwork to prove your partner is not lying about being a virgin/clean. he tricked her, plain and simple.

You my friend are a romantic living in a harsh harsh world. 6 months is not a long time at all. I was with teh guy who gave me HPV 5 years before I trusted him enough to go without a condom. ANd guess what? I still got screwed, and and we did trade test results, but little did either5 of us know HPV can't be tested fro him men so I have no blame to put on him, your friend is an idiot. Simple as that. You cann't get an STD and solely blame the other person, in fact she's an irresponisble idiot. YOu are in 100% control of your sexual health, or is this the moron who bought into the "if I'm on top I can get pregnant" theory? Because then I feel she needs to go back to 8th grade health class and made actually pay attention. Use a condom EVERY time. IF your get raped, then cry to me that you were given an STD. If you consent to having unprotected sex, go to a doctor and get medication.

OH and Synnr I know in NY you are required by law to contact all of your past partners if you develop AIDS (I'm not sure about other diseases) but they don't mention future parnters any where.

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That is just wrong Wrong WRONG!!!

Not the girl on top thing, This guy and his whole attitude!!

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the "you cant get pregnant if the girl is on top" guy was a different person but that doesnt really apply here anyway.

i was not saying that makes it 100% his fault, i am saying both are at fault. unknowingly spreading disease is one thing, knowingly infecting someone is cruel.

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well i was talking to my closest friend last night, and she mentioned she had started communicating with her ex again. he had attempted to get her to have sex and she declined, and then he tried again saying he doesnt care at all about his new gf and thats why he didnt tell her he has herpes and has unprotected sex with her. but that he cared enough to tell [my friend].

wtf? he was having unprotected sex with this girl, while fully aware that he had an STD!!!

that is BEYOND fucked up!

needless to say my friend called the girl immediately and told her to get herself tested. no word yet on the results.

but still this makes me so pissed off i would punch him in the face if i ever saw him in person! :angry: :angry: :angry:

Wow, this really sucks!!

I know where Suzy's coming from, since she got HPV, and I also got genital herpes with a guy that either didn't know, or didn't disclose. It can cause a lot of bitterness in these cases, when we hear of stuff like this happening to others, especially when someone already KNOWS they have something.

I'm not, in any way, saying that you shouldn't use condoms, however, I got herpes and had used a condom with this guy (it slipped off). Nothing is 100% against protection against STD's except total abstinance. No matter HOW LONG you go with someone, you should (though many people don't), get tested for everything you possibly can, before going bareback. YOU are the only one responsible for your own personal sexual health.

I contracted herpes while living in Texas. My doctor told me that, in the state of Texas, I am LEGALLY obligated to forwarn any future lovers of my STD status. I can be held accountable, IF I withhold the information, NOT giving the future lover a CHOICE as to whether or not they want to risk contracting it. IF said future lover decides to take the risk, then I would NOT be held accountable. Being held accountable means that I would be responsible for any/all of the medical issues (bills) that person may have due to contracting herpes.

I believe all one would have to do is check with the CDC, since these kinds of diseases have to be reported, to prove prior knowledge. Most people go to a doctor and have a test done, when they're hurting/having issues, and get diagnosed. Most blood tests for herpes are recommended to be done 12-16 weeks AFTER exposure according to the American Social Health Association. Just a normal pelvic exam (with vaginal scrapings) won't show anything, herpes wise, unless you have an active sore, and trust me on this, she would KNOW if she had an open sore!!! So, I would advise that she go and get retested again in another 3 mos or so. These tests, depending on which one they use, are 90-98% accurate.

I wrote an article on the forum, about living with an STD, as did SuzyP. Mine's called Living and Loving With an STD. I hope that she doesn't have it, but if she does, please show her that article.

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I hope that she doesn't have it, but if she does, please show her that article.

Ooo yeah, that was a great article Tyger :)

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Tyger, that was a great article and luckily (or hopefully) my HPV goes away. However, I agree with you 100% using protection and getting tested is the only way to not get an STD unknowingly. I understand that a huge part of being in love is trusting your partner, but most people DON'T get tested regularly and therefore don't know. And just cause a guy says "i'm clean" doesn't mean anything, i mean look at HPV there are no tests for guys, he may think he's clean but he doesn't know. Until your married or at least engaged wear your hats.

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There are at least a few of these that are transmitted by guys because there are really no noticable symptoms. Guys have no clue if they are truly clean without being tested on a regular basis. DO NOT EVER take a guy at his word for this! As you can see from the original post you won't get the truth anyway with a lot of them!

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That's very true Pappy. Many men have no clue that they're carriers of anything at all, unless they have an open sore right out there to see, or yes, even up inside their urethra! Then they KNOW something's wrong. :P Men are visual creatures. They like to SEE what's going on. If they don't SEE it, there's no problem. Actually, most people STILL have that way of thinking!! "That person LOOKS fine, so they MUST be safe to sleep with." :huh:

And, did you know that it's harder for a MAN to catch herpes and HPV than it is for a woman? That's not any reason to not protect yourself, but it's there.

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I didn't actually know that one. Now if I had that problem I'm sure I would be well versed in the cause, effect, protection and everything else. Chlymidia was the one I heard about being transferred by a guy.

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