Newbie babya2006 Posted April 20, 2006 Newbie Report Share Posted April 20, 2006 Back in November I flew to see my boyfriend (I'm 20, he's 21) and after 3 years of saying we were going to wait for marriage, we decided to go ahead and have sex. It was a very painful experience, so painful I could only let him put the head of his penis in because it hurt so bad. We have since done it probably 6 more times, and each time is as painful as the last. We do foreplay, and I feel as though I'm aroused, but whenever he starts to enter, it brings a burning sensation and once he is fully in(or at least I think he is, it hurts so bad I'm focused on the pain really), it just feels like he's scraping against the inside with every move he makes. It's very uncomfortable and it's really starting to bother me because I don't know what's wrong with me.I thought it might be a lubrication issue, but I went and bought a dildo(he lives in England, I live in America, so its not like we can practice a lot), and used some ky as a lubrication to see if I could use that without the pain. Even with that it burns and has a horrible painful feeling so I cant even force myself to put an inch of it inside of me.Has anyone else experienced this, or does anyone know how to help? I'm so frustrated :-\ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Newbie babya2006 Posted April 20, 2006 Author Newbie Report Share Posted April 20, 2006 Why haven't you talked to your doctor about this? Have a medical checkup. And tell the doctor what you have told us. If there is something wrong, he will find it, and can help you. What you are descibing is not normal.Because I hate doctors and I'm trying to find help myself. I'll go to one if nothing works, but for now I'd like some suggestions, I cant be the only one who has experienced painful intercourse. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members curvacious_lust Posted April 21, 2006 Members Report Share Posted April 21, 2006 Because I hate doctors and I'm trying to find help myself. I'll go to one if nothing works, but for now I'd like some suggestions, I cant be the only one who has experienced painful intercourse.I hate to say it, but seeing a doctor is the #1 choice in this situation. Sorry BabyA. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members crazy1 Posted April 21, 2006 Members Report Share Posted April 21, 2006 Yea, you might be doing something that could cause serious problems now. Get that checked on ASAP. I too am a warry person of medical pratitioners. But you gotta see someone about that. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Mikayla1 Posted April 21, 2006 Members Report Share Posted April 21, 2006 Ok, I have some ideas, but I think you will probably end up seeing a doctor here. First, there are many, many women (I have personally known 1) who get absolutely SO tensed up at the thought of having sex (getting pregnant, the "sin" factor, diseases, etc) that when they try - no go! ABSOLUTE horrific pain! The vagina is a muscle, and if you are tense - those muscles tense down there and ain't nothin' getting in there no matter what! So, if this is the case, you might just have to wait until marriage to eliviate some of the stress and worry. Having your BF overseas is a major sense of stress for you too. You are young, inexperienced, etc. I would suggest trying to relax a little (maybe a little drink!) Second, there are some women who have a hymen that never fully opens. You can get it to break, but it doesn't open enough to allow items (dildo's or penises) in. This is a medical condition (I forget the name) and it can be fixed, but you have to go to the doctor to be diagnosed and treated. That might be the next step if step number 1 doesn't work.Third, this might sound dumb, but I will ask - are you trying the right hole? It is true, some women have tried to have sex by inserting the penis in the urethral opening - which is smaller and under the vaginal opening. It is not impossible to get that to open large enough for insertion - but it would be hella-painful and would cause A LOT of damage! Please, make sure you have the right opening. Feel down for the first opening, between your labia - and under your clitoris (you do know where that is, right?) IF you are not sure - or your man isn't - please ask or look it up!If you can't get some resolution, GO SEE THE DOCTOR! Believe me, taking care fo your health is important and there is no question too stupid for a doctor!Good luck!Mikayla Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Newbie 2sexy4u Posted May 15, 2006 Newbie Report Share Posted May 15, 2006 Back in November I flew to see my boyfriend (I'm 20, he's 21) and after 3 years of saying we were going to wait for marriage, we decided to go ahead and have sex. It was a very painful experience, so painful I could only let him put the head of his penis in because it hurt so bad. We have since done it probably 6 more times, and each time is as painful as the last. We do foreplay, and I feel as though I'm aroused, but whenever he starts to enter, it brings a burning sensation and once he is fully in(or at least I think he is, it hurts so bad I'm focused on the pain really), it just feels like he's scraping against the inside with every move he makes. It's very uncomfortable and it's really starting to bother me because I don't know what's wrong with me.I thought it might be a lubrication issue, but I went and bought a dildo(he lives in England, I live in America, so its not like we can practice a lot), and used some ky as a lubrication to see if I could use that without the pain. Even with that it burns and has a horrible painful feeling so I cant even force myself to put an inch of it inside of me.Has anyone else experienced this, or does anyone know how to help? I'm so frustrated :-\ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members foryoureyesonly Posted May 15, 2006 Members Report Share Posted May 15, 2006 Please do not take offense at this, but had you ever had intercourse prior to that first attempt back in November? This sounds amazingly like my first few attempts at sex with my then boyfriend way back when (now my DH for 21+ years). If he got more than an inch in it was incredibly painful. I had never had sex prior to him so there was no stretching of the vaginal muscles. It took us probably 2-3 months of trying almost every weekend before I could comfortably have sex. Intercourse can and will be painful until the vagina has stretched to accomodate something the size of a penis. This may not happen for a while. Also with the time apart between visits you're not able to continue the trying and therefore the muscle retreats back to its prior size. The dildo can help with this but even with that, you must make sure you are well lubricated and go SLOW. This won't happen overnight. First and foremost though, please take the true experts advice and see your medical doctor to rule out any underlying causes. Good luck to you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Newbie babya2006 Posted June 24, 2006 Author Newbie Report Share Posted June 24, 2006 Please do not take offense at this, but had you ever had intercourse prior to that first attempt back in November? This sounds amazingly like my first few attempts at sex with my then boyfriend way back when (now my DH for 21+ years). If he got more than an inch in it was incredibly painful. I had never had sex prior to him so there was no stretching of the vaginal muscles. It took us probably 2-3 months of trying almost every weekend before I could comfortably have sex. Intercourse can and will be painful until the vagina has stretched to accomodate something the size of a penis. This may not happen for a while. Also with the time apart between visits you're not able to continue the trying and therefore the muscle retreats back to its prior size. The dildo can help with this but even with that, you must make sure you are well lubricated and go SLOW. This won't happen overnight. First and foremost though, please take the true experts advice and see your medical doctor to rule out any underlying causes. Good luck to you.Thanks for the reply. I just got back from spending a month with him and after about a week of painful trying every day...something finally just clicked and I relaxed and ever since then it was okay for me. Still if he tries to soon it may hurt for a split second, but then everything is fine. Im so glad I can stop stressing about it! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members nosleepnmesa Posted June 25, 2006 Members Report Share Posted June 25, 2006 Glad to hear that the pain is gone and everything is well. If it is long times between seeing him the other post are right on in saying that the vaginal muscle will retract back so a dildo is good but make sure you use a good lube. Also If it comes back to hurting and being painful then I think I would still see a doctor anyway heck once a year check-ups arent that bad and your health is very important. Good luck and I am glad to hear it is going much better Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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