Tyger

I'm talking like those Letter magazines, or even novels, short stories, whatever? I love to read, and erotica is great!! I am a very visual person, and several times, I have felt the warm rush of blood heating up my lower regions with something I am reading. I'm not talkin' those cheezy Harliquin romance novels (but some of the vampire novels I read can really do it). I even like the Letters sections in Hustler and Playboy. What's your favorite type of reading material?

I'm a little late to this party too! But, in cases of any newbies, let me also suggest, like I recently did to a now very happy friend, for a first toy that you plan on using with your SO (significant other) just a clit stimulator, such as the Hustler Rock It Clit stimulator. http://shop.tootimid.com/index.asp?PageAct...ROD&ProdID=4680 This thing is awesome!! And it doesn't resemble a penis at all (great idea BTW, Mikalya). This would be less intimidating, easy to manuver, and can be used on both partners. My husband was hesitant at first, with any kind of toy, saying that if he "did it for me" then I shouldn't NEED a sex toy. I had had sex toys before I met him, and he knew this, but I kept telling him that it was for added pleasure, not replacement.

I would have to say vaginal. The 2 guys I tried anal with, were rather too well-endowed for a newbie anal try-er, IMO And my hubby now is too big to even try to go there!!

I've seen this one before, and thought it was very funny!!

I use to get jealous all of the time, when I was younger. Then I realized that it just didn't help anything. And if a partner is going to cheat, there is nothing YOU can do about them cheating. They will do it no matter how jealous and possessive you get. I would ENVY some people for what they had, look like, or whatever, and still do occassionally. But I think everyone does that. Hence why cosmetic surgery is SO popular!! I do enjoy it when my hubby gets a little "possessive" in public, like putting his arm about me and stuff. But that's only cuz he's not an overly physical person to begin with. That, and we don't go out much now!!

Total lovers: 9, all men. Have always wanted to try with a female though. I did do heavy petting with 3 other guys, but no intercourse or oral sex there. I lost my virginity at age 16, in one of my best friend's bed. First blowjob when I was 17, with my third partner. I am 33 now.

I too have the Jessica's strobing G-spot vibe. That thing is awesome!! And my lights work, though I laughed at the thought of a lighting up vibrator. Reminds me of the lights that they use blinking on an airport strip *makes come this way motion with her arms* C'mon in for a landing baby!!! It is wide, so use lots of lube!!

Also, try one of those college lockers? They come in a variety of sizes, due to dorms being small and crowded. Or even a single (or even 2) drawer file cabinet. Use it as a little nightstand or something, lock it, and put the key somewhere safe in the bedroom, like a jewelry case. Right now, I have what little we have in a plastic tub under the bed, but I will have to get a small case or something soon. Good luck!! Kids are quite resourceful!!!

Whoo-hoo!! That bad boy looks interesting!!! I too like the colored ones, like purple, pink, maybe even black. The "flesh/natural" colored ones kinda creep me out, like it was hacked off some dude or something.

I too, have meoments of "dryness" too. We use the basic KY jelly, no warming gel or anything. Could be something that makes the lubricant "warm up" burns her too much to handle? Just use the basic lubricating jellies. Something that is natural like the Astro. The more natural, the better. That Slender G-spot vibe that comes in pink or purple looks like it would do the trick, IMO. Although, like the review said, I also prefer a softer feel. Something a bit more gentle for extended play. It's hard to get over the stigma of MBing being "bad for you" if that's what you grew up believing. It's hard to let loose and relax if you feel like you're doing something totally wrong (or some of us actually LIKE that idea LOL ). It will take some time for her to be comfortable to MB. Just let her try on her own, and when she wants. Give her some privacy about it. Then one night, ask her to show you (after you know she's done it a few times). Let her know that it excites you. That, for me, would be all the encouragement I would need.

Just like with any kind of physical stimulation, it depends on what YOU like to have done. Some like harder or more intense clit stimulation. I had a Butterfly type thing. It was gold, and I never did like that thing. I had a friend who LOVED hers! My advise, is to try it a few more times, maybe even exciting yourself with your tried-and-true BOB friend, and then go from there. Or have your BF use it on you when he gets back. Maybe there's too much concentration on your part. Or, accept the fact that that thing may not work for you, and go pick something out that you think interests you a bit more. Sometimes, picking out sex toys for others, unless you REALLY know them, is like trying to pick out a book for someone. Everyone has different tastes, like different story lines, and so on..... At least your BF tried to do something nice for you. Good luck!!

So long as it doesn't get violent, or paranoid, do you think that a bit of jealousy on your SO's part is a good thing?

Mikala made a good point. What you're doing is good too. But, if there are ANY doubts, just come out and tell him something direct, like "I am so glad I have you as such a good friend, I would hate for anything to come between us." Or, even better (maybe) "You do realize that we're just friends, right? I love you as a friend, and hope that'e enough for you." Blunt, but to the point. My Freaky Friend with Benifits was off and on about it all. He acted as though he wanted to go date, but if I looked at another guy, or had one that was definitely interested in me, he acted all wierd. When I did finally start truly "dating" he insisted on MEETING my dates!! We were roommates (with another girl he wound up with and they have a child now), so he made it sound like he was doing us a "favor" by being protective!! Later on, when I finally moved out, I kept telling him that HE was the one that didn't want anyone to know we were sleeping together, and HE was the one that kept insisting there was no romantic attatchments, and that all of that was FINE by me, since I was divorcing at the time. HE was the wishy-washy "I want my cake and eat it too" guy! Been there, done that, got the t-shirt!

I use to be very loud!! But now, with a very small house and a daughter whom is a light sleeper, I am much more quiet, but definitely not silent!! And I verbalize.

All I can say is WOW....

I laughed a lot when I read this, not only cuz it was funny, but because it is true!! The other thing I have to agree on, and relate too, is having Daddy help with the kids and some minor housework to help Mommy relax, so later on she can be WIFE (they're different roles, hence the different terms). You can't really go from picking up toys, cleaning diapers, scrubbing peas off the floor, to instant sex kitten. Ever since having my daughter, I too, haven't really wanted a lot of sex, much to the grumblings of hubby. Self-esteem issues, lack of help around the house, no quality alone time, and lack of sleep, well, they all take a toll on one's sex life. Plus, I work nights, he works days, so we both get little sleep. And, even though mothers sometimes can "go right back to sleep" after they have satisfied their husbands, it is not always the case. Esp. with newborns. Dr's aren't kidding when they tell a new mother "sleep when the baby sleeps" cuz that's the only sleep they can get! And I'm not sure about the men, but when I get little to no sleep, the eruption of Mt. Vesuvius ain't got nothin' on me!! It's not pretty, and the LAST thing I want is to be touched. I am, in expert's opinions, a BITCH when I have little sleep. And I admit it. So, yes, been there, doing that, and our daughter is 3!! The best thing to do, is to help her out-without being asked (this will mean more than a bouquet of roses~trust me!), be patient, show appreciation, help her out (worth mentioning twice), give sincere compliments, not only of how good a mother she is and what a good job she is doing, but sincerely how attractive you find her.

I am responding to this post before I read any of the responses. I will go back and read them in a bit! So if I copy someone, I am sorry for the redundancy!! Where does HE get off calling YOU lousy in bed AND a prude!!! It sounds like HE needs to wear that title!!! I mean, you did the searching, and now he doesn't even want to try it? And doesn't want to explore other options, like watching simple porn with his WIFE?? Cybering is OK, IF IF IF both partners are OK with it. Now, if he's neglecting you, or coming in a just giving you slut talk, instead of loving words to HIS WIFE, then there is a major problem, IMO. Once in a while "slut talk" is fine. But that is either for booty calls, or slut talk. And I am SO sorry that he is treating you like that. Toys shouldn't be an issue either. I mean, he TOLD YOU to get better in bed, you are trying, but not to his liking? How fair is that?? I am a bit steamed for you. Sorry, but this is how I see it, just from what you've said. Good luck!!

As in, really not expecting it? I was in my car a few years ago (before kid, and single), had the stereo up, and listening to All Stars "Battleflag" (rap/rock), and felt it coming on, then BOOM!! The bass in that song, and apparently how I was sitting just so caused me to O while driving!! I love that song!!! It only happened to me that once, but I wasn't complaining!

That looks really cool!! I chose the USA link, and it worked for me.

Well, I assume you are young, but not sure how young, from your age response anyway. That said, I am also assuming that there hasn't been a lot of experience for you, sexually. If your BF thinks that you need to do more during sex, then, maybe that is true, but HE also needs to be doing more to help satisfy YOU too. I don't know too many men (actually I don't know a single one) that doesn't like to "go down" on their women. Some men find that almost more pleasurable then actual sex, cuz they know they are hitting more sensitive areas. Sex between 2 people that aren't in it just to get off, need to communicate, as mentioned before, and also come up with some creative things to do, places to do it, and positions to try. There's nothing wrong with getting some sexual toys, books, videos. It may help excite the both of you, and learning new things never hurts either. Have fun with it. Train him how to please you (also assuming that you know WHAT pleases you). Have him train you on what pleases him. Whether or not you stay together, in the long run, this will make you both better lovers!

I stayed with a man for months after I realized that I didn't love him. Mostly because of the whole comfort aspect. We'd been together for 4.5 yrs. One day, I realized that I had just lied to him by telling him I loved him. And I respected him enough to realize that, and was frank with him that night, after some serious soul-searching and thought into how I was going to tell him. Financial security is a beautiful thing, however, if he thinks that you are truly in love with him (gotta agree with Howard, 3 mos isn't enough time to fully know if this is true love or not), then you are being unfair to him AND to yourself. After all, you are holding each other back by putting up the facade of loving him. If he knows that you don't love him, then maybe he is waiting to see if you will fall in love with him. If you don't think you can, then maybe you should be moving on, to be fair to both of you, and your future potential mates as well. I'm not trying to sound demeaning when I say this, but you ARE young, and this is the time to be having a bit of fun, learning about yourself, what you want, experience a little life before committing to a life-long relationship too. Ultimately, the decision is yours to make. YOU must search yourself and your feelings. There is no easy answer. Good luck.

My mistake then. I got that from the "have a frank discussion with your children". That's what I thought was meant. I apologize. As far as talking to the ex wife, it may be a good idea, when you think that she is ready to try and communicate as a parent, and not when she is trying to come back. Many divorced parents bad-mouth the other spouse, esp infront of the kids, out of bitterness (my mother and father divorced when I was 9, my father passed on in '98, and my mother STILL tries to do this!). If not now, when your children mature more, they will realize which parent was a bit more fair when it came to dealing with the other. That will help them in relationships. Don't rush into thinking about how they will possibly treat your GF if she was to become their step-mother, for you are freshly divorced, and getting remarried in such a hurry wouldn't be a good thing for either of you or your GF. But it is something to think about later on. You don't know how old your girls will be when/if that even happens. You may find that you will have the hardest time with the youngest, but that may not always be the case. That is just from what I have seen personally, in situations similar to this at least. I hope that this helps. This is just my view as a child of divorce, and as a step-parent as well. Good luck to you and your family! And, I am online at that time in the A.M. cuz I get off of work at 2:30, and get online to relax before bed, BTW.

Again, I respectfully disagree with Howard. I am a child of divorce, as I am sure many of us are. I don't believe that it's any of the children's business why the marriage failed. Telling your kids that Mommy slept with another man, no matter how old they are is NONE of their business. Plus, it would sound bitter and mean to them. They need to respect both parents, and that wouldn't help YOU or her there. No, I don't think that pics of your current GF is wrong to have up. They're old enough to know that. It'd be different if they were under ten yrs old. But they're not. You're not sure what they are being told. And you really shouldn't ask them, cuz that would make them feel like they have to choose sides. Just tell them that there were issues that couldn't be resolved, you're moving on with your life, and that you would like them to try and do the same. It's your house, you make the payments, or paid for it, and they can't tell you what you can and can't put up, especially in your space (I think you said her pic was in your bedroom?). Slowly intergrate your GF into your life with your kids. Maybe just a dinner one night, movie one night, so on. Don't force her on them, cuz they will resent it. Also, remember to spend quality time with all of them, especially the youngest. A daugther will always love her Daddy. You have to nurture the relationship, and let them go when they want to fly. Best of luck to you and your family!

I too have noticed that Kitty's posts have been kind of on the negative side as of late. I read a lot of posts, and don't post replies, so I've seen a few. I hope that nobody feels they need to leave this forum due to negativity. Don't let one bad apple spoil the barrel. If anything, maybe Kitty's jealous? I don't know. But whatever it is, I hope she learns to curb her negativity and rude comments. Everyone is entitled to their opinions. But lets keep in mind people, we are all adults here, with adult concerns, topics, jokes, and experiences. If there is a post that you personally find offensive in nature, or doubt the sincerity of a poster, then just pass it by. Why respond?

I gotta agree with Dolphins, and, respectfully, disagree with Howard. MOST men, IMO, wouldn't be able to "handle" a woman telling them that they are a lousy lover. Especially a past lover. That would almost sound cruel and bitter of the woman to the man, I would think. Now, slowly teaching them as you go, yes, that would work, but a man's ego is a fragile thing, and most wouldn't take it so well.