whittibo

I had a lengthy talk with him last night and we got a lot sorted out. He said he knew there was a problem but didn't know how to solve it. He told me he loves me and was very sorry. I am sure we'll fall into the same rut over and over again, but I have to not let it get that far out of control anymore and not keep it pent up. It's hard to talk to a man when I am not from a family who talks and neither is he. And our lives out of the bedroom is wonderful when our bedroom life is functioning. I think we BOTH try to stay away from each other when we're both miserable. So hopefully that will change again now too.

I used to have to take my youngest to the local school (prior to her being IN school) for speech therapy twice a week. When I see 8 year olds wearing leather pants, high heals and tight shirts, it's enough to make my stomach turn. My kids are not typical home schoolers that you think of when you think of home schoolers. I don't make them wear dresses and have long straight hair and they have to keep their mouths shut. They talk back to me just like teenagers do. They have social interactions, they are just well behaved kids and most of that is due to home schooling. I am an introvert. I have social anxieties. I knew I could not/would not be able to work in a school setting. I am fine around kids, just not adults and most of that comes from my own dad telling me all my life I wasn't good enough. Wasn't pretty enough, not skinny enough, not smart enough, my legs were too fat, my boobs were different sizes. Also living in CA where EVERYONE has to be a supermodel, well that eats away at your self esteem as well. So I knew I wouldn't be active in my kids schooling IF they went to public school. We were around public school kids, we didn't want our kids to act like that. And frankly I didn't want my kids to go through the peer pressure I had to go through. I have been home schooling my kids for 10 years now. I started when very few families were doing it. I have never regretted my choice to home school and in fact it's been a huge blessing since my two younger kids have ADD and are dyslexic, like me. My oldest thought she might want to go to school this year as she is a Freshmen, but we all, as a family decided it was better to keep her home. And honestly, every kid in this neighborhood tells my kids how lucky they are that they get to be home schooled. One young boy, his mom is a teacher at the local high school, a very GOOD high school and she was considering pulling him out and letting him learn at home. :s It's a personal choice, and I don't try to talk anyone into doing it, if people ask, I tell them, otherwise, I respect their decision to send their kids to school. It's not for everyone, that's for sure. But just like I respect everyone else's choice to send their kids to school, I appreciate others respecting MY choice not to.

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I was horney as all get out when I was pregnant, it's after the babies are born that I don't want to be touched. I am tired, have had a kid sucking on me all day, needing me to do everything for them, and the last thing I want is to have to get my husband off too. But that might just be MY relationship since sex isn't all that great in my marriage and it IS all me having to do all the work all the time. So as others have said, you'll just have to find out for yourself. But talk to your wife, I know I hated the thought of him touching my breasts, he enjoyed it, but I felt like they were for the babies, NOT him.

WHEW!! Big sigh of relief from me too. That just sounds insane, I am glad you didn't get caught up in it. No doubt you did the right thing!

Boy, I have been sheltered all my life, I have never heard of anything like this and it would scare the shit out of me. You want a husband, a life long partner, NOT some other man. I would run as fast as I could away from this situation. When I first started reading your post, I thought, "ahhhh.. the guy wants to have a pure relationship until they get married". That was my husbands intentions and I didn't understand it at first, thought he must not love me if he didn't want to have sex with me, but he respected me and didn't want to spoil me, even though I wasn't a virgin, he was. But gosh, this isn't at all what your guy wants. :s

Tyger, what was the product??

Agreed. I have fantasies too, but would NEVER want them acted upon.

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1.) How do you know it won't be a wham-bam thing? Is he still friends with all the other girls he has slept with?? 2.) So what you're the lass in the corner, you will find the right guy for you, and you will have something special to share with him. Don't jump in the sac with any man who "wants it", because honestly, they all do. You have only ONE time to lose your virginity, save it for someone who you love and deserves it. Sex as a teen is over rated, once you have it, then you think you have to have it with all your boyfriends. (well I did anyway) and that's one thing I can never change about my past. My current husband, when I met him, he wouldn't sleep with me. I was shocked and thought he didn't care about me. He said, "I DO love you, that's why I won't disrespect you by sleeping with you". That's what you want, a man who loves YOU and respects you enough to wait.

EXCELLENT ADVICE!

I have been getting the depo shot for almost 9 years now, I was on it before my 3rd daughter was born too, so a total of about 13 years or so. LOVE IT!!! I have no ill side effects, and don't have periods which is a big one for me. I would have horrible mood swings and cramps and back aches and I have none of those now. I had a hard time with the pill, I would get nauseated by them and that's never fun. I know now they have better ones on the market, I haven't taken the pill for about 14 years maybe.