vanilla_bean

Waiting for Aiden with flowers and lingerie. I'm bringing energy bars for everyone. Since you're in a boxing ring, maybe I should spritz you all down like they do in the movies.

Aww Aiden!! You are so kind and giving on TT. You deserve those things. Tell you what, meet me at the forum member dating thread I I'll have flowers and lingerie waiting for you.

Thanks for the additional info. I'm still kinda worried about your situation though.

Well, I was very vanilla for a long time. Bean is meant to pun on "been". So to me it stands for "have been vanilla". Not quite so vanilla anymore.

I was watching a rerun of "Sex in th City" the other night (never caught the 1st runs) and the characters were all EWWWW because one of them had a lover who kissed her after having oral sex with her. Really??? Is this usually a problem for women? It's just you. I don't get this. Is it not cool to want to kiss after oral (because the women on Sex in the City are ubercool)?

Not a great story here so I'll be brief. I was 15, he was a couple of years older. We had been dating a while. We were making out, I said "NO". He did anyway. Then I continued to date him. Idiot. He grew up to be a teacher and guess what! He lost his teaching license for molesting a 15 year old girl. It still bugs me that if I had of reacted differently, that girl (and maybe others for all I know) would have been spared. I know, crappy story.

I am from Canada where we also have socialized medicine and you're right, it does have its pros and cons, but I am not assigned a doctor and I am not told when I can and can't go. I am not familiar with the system in England. We have no age limits on seeing specialists. This is a situation that I would take to my GP and he would probably deal with it. I have been going to the same GP for about 15 yrs. If he felt it was necessary or if I asked him to he would refer me to a gyno. None of this would cost me anything, but we do pay higher taxes. The other problem is that in many places there are doctor shortages (all over the world really) and so wait times for specialists can be long.

Have you ever had a limerick writing contest? You could require that they are about toys or TT or even just sex (but then I would suggest that no one is allowed to use the word Nantucket).

Man, I'm glad my husband didn't take any advice for Dr. Z when I was in an extended slump. Anybody read stuff by Wendy Strgar? She would be the polar opposite of Dr. Z. It might be interesting to hear those two duke it out. Strgar's tag line is "Keeping love sustainable. She wrote an article that I found interesting (although I didn't agree with every word of it) here: http://www.realitysandwich.com/sustainable_love

umm, yum

Well with a safe word there is no mistake. It' not part of the role you're playing. And it's only one word so it's quick. (By the way Sailor Girl, I always look forward to your posts. You're very frank and adorable).

OK, I was hesitant but I'll share. Either I'm really bad at giving head or my husband is not comfortable getting it. I've been with him and him alone for a long time, but I don't remember getting any complaints in the past. I have read the articles and have tried to be good at this. He is not religious and is pretty adventurous in other ways (toys, anal). Like your husband, BFB, he will usually say, no, it's OK when I go down on him. He says it feels good and that I'm not doing it wrong, but he usually doesn't want it or not for long. The other night he came to bed quite late and started getting me all worked up. I rolled over and started giving him oral. He said, "Actually it's quite late and we have to get up early. I shouldn't have started anything." we quit in the middle of a blow job!! Maybe I am that bad. I've seen classes on giving blow jobs. If there was ever one near here, I would SOOO go to it. Anyway, just wanted to let you know that you're not the only wife dealing with this.

ButterflyBetty, you're not alone.

Nobody's perfect so there are a few little things that I would change. There are times I would been more patient and understanding if I could go back. I had a close relative who took his life. I wish I could have lightened his burden or at least appreciated him more when I had him in my life. None of these things changes who I am or where I am and I've never felt better about myself than I do these days.

Thank God that little girl has you two. My heart goes out to all of you. Good luck.

Some of you mentioned that you usually shave and occasionally wax. How long do you need to stop shaving for in order for the hair to be long enough to wax? How long does the wax last? Lately I've become a little obsessed with getting smoother skin.

O my! check out these tats. http://www.nakedcity.com/2008/04/top_ten_c...exy_tattoos.php

Thanks iha. I will be trying this.

Maintaining an erection is only a problem for him in any position where I'm on top. Otherwise he has pretty good stamina. Like I said, I'm satisfied with our sex life already. I guess it's just all the threads on here about position that have got me thinking, wishing. By the way, we've been together for many years and it's been this way as long as I can remember. I've gotten more adventurous lately, so I'm noticing it more.

Really, listen to these people.

I'm sure you look beautiful and your lover is in for a treat. I agree with the others, you'll never go back. It's funny how we look at ourselves. When I first shaved I thought it made me look fat (OK, I have issues).

I have no idea how common this is but I haven't seen it asked about anywhere else. My husband and I have very satisfying sex, but he can't maintain an erection when I'm on top. This limits things a bit as far as variety of positions go. I hope it's not me. He says he enjoys the view and that he's into it when I'm on top, but it's "a blood flow thing". I can live without being on top, but if anyone has experienced this and has a solution, I would love to hear it. We have tried cock rings without much success. Thanks for any input.

It was a long time ago, but I can remember feeling this way. Your fanasy is so true. Hotel sex is Hot!! If you want to spend your money on a hotel room, go for it. It would be worth it. If you're spending someone else's money, there are always strings attached. The starving student thing has obvious drawbacks, but it's also a fun time in other ways. Enjoy yourself.

Yeah, what Tyger says. I got the impression that you felt like wanting to react in "dickhead mode" which could bite you in the ass.

This situation sucks and they are being boneheads, but I say take a deep breath and give it some space before you do anything. It seems like one of those times when you just can't win and reacting might do more harm than good.