ginshreve

I am so hot just reading that line (and the great stories) and imagining how well it would work... can hardly wait to use it!

Thanks for the reply, still learning - since I initiated this thread, I have had a different boyfriend who was not circumcized - he was amazing in many ways, and it was quite fun to play with his penis and the foreskin - as others have said, it wasn't all that different in practicality, and he is a very hygienic type, so no issues there...

To my mind, it is okay to "enjoy" the punishment a little... I don't see a problem with you earning a spanking, which would then be enjoyable to you.... that might be fun in a different way! But I also really like Mikayla's ideas. My suggestions were similar: having to do housework clad only in an apron, being chained/handcuffed to him for a period of time, or even doing house chores for him. I think it's hard to get away from any sexuality in the punishments at all... because the whole scene is sexual, really.

From my point of view, nothing is hotter than going down on a guy and then sharing his cum with him... one of my exes maintained that ejaculate has a numbing agent in it and made his mouth a little bit numb! I don't know that I have ever noticed that.... and equally hot is having him go down on me to clean up a bit after he cums inside me... but not many men will do that, and I appreciate the explanations offered here - it makes sense.

I would pick this: http://shop.tootimid.com/ProductImages/liberator/lwr02main.jpg the liberator! My guy and I are on the plus side, and very adventuresome - but missionary is a bit harder to manage in an intimate face-to-face way. I think this would enable us to do better/closer missionary, which would enhance that intimate connection...

Oddly enough, Mikayla, I am dating a man who loves, LOVES the feel of my teeth around his penis when I am going down on him. When I am taking him as deeply as I can (which is not all that deeply on him as he is huge) and I gently close my teeth around the middle of the shaft and open and close my teeth slowly as I pull up to the head, he quivers and groans and it seems to be a very positive reaction (not fear, LOL). I can actually feel him swell in my mouth when I do this. I don't know how I thought to try this; I am SURE I have spent years of giving bjs carefully avoiding any penis to teeth touches. Maybe it was because he is just so dern big and meaty that it made me want to test it with my teeth, I honestly don't know.... maybe it was because he responded so well to the little nibbles up and down the shaft (aka the corn-on-the-cob move). I agree with you that it is probably a no-no for most men, and should only be attempted with caution especially at first, but I'm really glad that it occurred to me to try this. I guess I knew he would like it the same way he intuited that I would like my neck bitten... Another suggestion which men seem to love: angle your mouth so that the head of the penis rubs against the roof of your mouth, where the ridges are... by the responses I get from this, it must feel mighty good.

ladylove, it is wonderful! Definitely worth a try - when current bf does this, it takes my breath away. And I love to feel the soreness the next day (preferably in places that don't show, like my nipples) - it is a constant reminder of the fun we had.

I love to keep my eyes open while making love, but it is really hard - I need to block out visual distractions to focus on the inner orgasm... the times when I have made the effort to look into my man's eyes have been very erotic, not sure about spiritual... I think we are still building to that kind of connection and hope we will eventually be there.

I feel the most with oral, and can feel the ejaculate rising in his penis seconds before he releases; in my vagina I can only feel the heat and wetness when he cums - but that is a wonderful feeling, to be sure!

I think a "fundamental disinterest in sex" can be addressed, because to me, the physical part of sex is not the part I miss the most when I'm not in a sexual relationship. To me, sex is an emotional intimacy and connection, even more than a physical one, and I wonder if that emotional intimacy is lacking, which is then coming out in the physical part of your relationship. There are a couple of things that I would suggest to try and perk up her interest, now that the pain is under control. Some of these might work for you, and it's worth considering them. Hire a cleaning service to do the housework so that she is relieved of that chore. I find that disinterest in sex often results from being over-tired and/or stressed out, so the more of that you can relieve the more likely she will feel sexually energetic. If hiring cleaners is not feasible, then step up and make sure you are doing a full 50% - and the bigger percentage you do, the more energy she will have left for love-making. Sometimes resentment over an unequal distribution of housework masquerades as lack of sexual interest, and you are already forwarned that this is not a woman who talks easily about things painful to her. Also, sometimes women spend their days taking care of others, at work, in their family, even their friends - and it is very erotic to me when my man makes an extra effort to nurture me - and not just when he wants something from me. Another thing to try is to set up an evening of no sex, only sensual play. You are good at research, read up on the Tao of Sexual Massage, and challenge her to complete the book with you - it is full of sensual massages and touch, but actual sex is prohibited until the activities in the book are finished. Sometimes it's nice to build up the sexual anticipation and excitement without being allowed to fully release it, and she may be willing to engage around this with the hard and fast rule of no actual sexual activity.

Even more good points, hyokahay - I'll check the idea page out! I don't mind sharing my secrets... It was my plan to spend a lot more time orally anyway, so it's nice to know from a male pov that oral is better on so many levels... I did not realise that.

Biting the back of my neck - medium hard, not lightly, and biting the tops of my ears - especially from behind me, and especially when we are making love - really turns me on. There is something so animalistic and primitive about it, I can't explain why it is so erotic, and there have only been 2 men in my history who have figured this out - but for me, there is nothing like it. Add to that: sucking my breasts and nipples REALLY hard! Most guys are way too tentative with this, but I love to feel that power...

Thanks very much for your response, Mikayla - we did try me on top for a bit, his preference was for me to sit on him with my legs on his chest and his penis inserted, which felt VERY deep to me, but did relieve the pounding some. I lost my cervix when I had a hysterectomy, so he is not hitting THAT - but the repeated pounding did feel the exact same way as I recall it feeling when my ex would occasionally hit the cervix- not unpleasant for brief periods of time, but not enjoyable over the long haul, either. We did some modified spooning positions, not the classic back to front one, I will suggest that... I really appreciate your suggestions. I want him to get what he needs sensation-wise and don't want him to have to give up too much of his enjoyment. Interestingly enough, when I was giving oral I was able to bring him to the edge of orgasm with none of the pounding, so perhaps there is a way to do this vaginally as well...

Thanks, and I am LMAO at the rhino man analogy - perhaps not too far off the mark. He told me that he had read the Kama Sutra (and indeed, has implemented some very different positions from what I am accustomed to!) so perhaps I can use that to help me talk about this with him. While I don't want to be uncomfortable, I am worried about the "retraining" thing - how does one go about that? Nor do I want to give this man up, he is everything I have been looking for for a very long time. I can't believe that THIS is the issue that I am having with Mr. Wonderful - too much of a good thing, lol. (and It is so nice to Have you bAck!)

I need suggestions... My new boyfriend, who is a wonderful, WONDERFUL guy - loves sex, and can go for hours (erect for 30-45 min at a time before he becomes semi-erect for 30 min or so before getting hard again). He's good at the oral stuff, and also likes recieving oral from me and is quite responsive to that. So yesterday, we had marathon sex on a cool, rainy Sunday afternoon. I'm talking from 12:45 to 7:30 pm, with some breaks in between for pillow talk and feeding each other grapes. He came once in this time, near 7:30. But the length of the time we are making love is not really the problem. I think the issue for me is his size. He is at least 8 inches when fully erect (maybe more), and 2 1/2 around - and I honestly think it might be more than that but I did not pull out the tape measure. After round 1, which lasted about 45 min, I was horrified to discover that I had bled all over - he asked me if I was having a period (LOL NO, I have had a hysterectomy). Nothing really hurt, I didn't feel any tearing, and I was plenty lubricated I thought - and the subsequent rounds did not have any more bleeding. But after a while, the pounding and thrusting against the back end of my vagina just hurt. I wonder if I could be bruised internally! He started out gently, but as he became more aroused as time passed, his strokes became more forceful, and I worried if the whole penis could fit in (he said most of it did). At one point he said something about him holding back, and I said "WHAT?? This is holding back?!!?" and he said he could go much harder, and then showed me that he was indeed holding back in comparison to what he could do. And he said that wasn't even full strength, and I believe that, too. I am so worried that I am not going to be able to stretch to comfortably accomodate this man, and the sexual relationship is too important to me to set up a relationship in which I would avoid sex or dread it. Is it possible for vaginas to just be too small? Any tips or techniques that might make it more comfortable for me, yet would give him the pressure/stimulation he needs? Any suggestions from others who have been in similar situations?

LOL, I intended the comment for hyokahay - but Thanks!! I skate in and out, more often if I have a question or a particular experience or insight I want to share - and I avoided the boards during the recent unrest, they are a much nicer place to visit now!

When you say "can't get the job done", exactly what do you mean? Are you saying the women you are with do not orgasm from intercourse alone and you feel it is due to the size of your penis? I recently had a lover who was definitely on the smaller side (maybe 4"?), and I had never been with anyone that size - plus he had some ED issues, so it was hard to get very far on penis-in-vagina intercourse alone. He was extraordinarily skilled with his mouth and fingers, and had a way of coaxing out orgasm after orgasm by being attentive to the specific things he did which built to orgasm in me. He was very sensitive to what was happening in my body, took his time, worked with a range of sensations, and made sure to identify the g-spot and work it with his fingers whilst sucking my clit - FABULOUS intense orgasms like I have never had before with any penis!!! He could make me squirt like I had rarely ever done, almost every time we made love. What he also taught me is that much of the sensation in a vagina is near the entrance, no need to go deep if you work with the angles that exist near the opening. He was also willing to use toys to give me that very full feeling on occasions. We eventually broke up for reasons that had nothing to do with sex - in fact, he was sooo very goood that I was really sad about the breakup, even though we were not well suited temperamentally. On the positive side, I loved giving him bjs because the size was so manageable - never chokeing. And he was the first guy I was ever interested in anal with, because, once again, his size was not intimidating. So I'm here to say, it can be done! Of course, he and I are both in our 50s (not sure of your age range) so our attitude about the whole situation might be different.

I dated a man for several months who maintained that he just didn't ever cum from oral, and although he enjoyed it, he said he had only ever cum once or twice. Mid 40's age wise. He denied hangups about it, but I am not sure he was being honest with himself about that. One occasion (a morning!!) I was determined to get him to cum, and worked like a dog with mouth, lips, hands, tongue - working it, I telll you, until my mouth was sore and I was exhausted - I tried for over 45 minutes with no success. Yeah, it could have been me - some people aren't as good as they think they are, but I do enjoy it very much, and that is half the battle, I think. However, my next boyfriend (mid fifties), 3 months later, told me that he had NEVER had such great bjs, never been with a woman who paid such good attention, took her time, and seemed to really enjoy it as much as I did - and I could get him to cum almost every time, even with his ED issues. Current boyfriend is late 40s, 9 1/2 inches long, 2 1/2 inches around, uncircumcized, and man, I have never seen anything like that before. We are early in our relationship, so the issue hasn't come up yet in a serious way. I have only dared suck and lick around it a bit - I don't know where to start! I am scared to death to have that monster in my mouth exploding. (Maybe this needs to be a whole new thread.)

Glad to see you back, and I recognized your unique style of writing before the clues, thinking "can this be...?"

I can have g-spot orgasms, but it takes a couple of regular orgasms first, then manual stimulation of the g-spot, along with preferably oral stim on my clit - I've never had the ejaculate without a screaming orgasm to go along with it; I don't know what to suggest!

And for us bigger girls, Lane Bryant has some great stuff. I've gotten all of mine from the store there.

Wonderful, isn't it? I've recently learned that talented lips and fingers are even better than a penis..............

Honestly, Mickey - my current partner is the absolute best lover I have ever had. While I might miss the full feeling from a bigger penis, he never hesitates to give me that with toys, and I have never experienced anything like what he does with his fingers and mouth. I don't know what might eventually end our relationship, but it won't be anything related to sexual satisfaction. STUDY women's bodies, study what women say here - make it your hobby. Really learn where ALL of the buttons are and how to work them. Let women feel that you cherish their bodies, every inch of their bodies, inside and out - and look for women who are not superficial, which means you also have to look below the surface appearance. None of us are perfect - and penis size can be overcome. (I have heard this from other women as well, it's not just my experience). If you have specific questions, I'm happy to answer if I can.

I admit, I had been curious about anal sex for awhile - reading the forums, thinking about it, and interested in anal play on my partner, who seemed to enjoy it. But I had not committed to getting there myself, and I have to admit that along with the interest was a great deal of apprehension about it: how would it feel, would it hurt, would it interfere with my very healthy bowel functioning - so I was not in a rush to experiment on my own body. My current partner has proven himself to be a gentle, loving, and patient man who puts my comfort and orgasms ahead of his own. Yes, really. He makes our erotic adventures a whole lot about me, which makes me want to make it, in turn, a whole lot about him. In the process of our foreplay and sex play, he let me know that he was very interested in anal. On hearing my reservations, he assured me that there was no rush, and that he would never go farther than I wanted and was comfortable with. He had demonstrated his patience many times, so I was able to relax and enjoy the play with no pressure to go farther than I was ready to. In the process of oral sex, he would just occasionally lick around my anus. The first time this happened, I almost leapt off the bed in shock! I guess he could tell, and asked if it was okay - by that time I had regained my breath and my composure, and could tell him how absolutely wonderful it felt, and could give him permission to go there again when he was ready. He began incorporating rimming into regular oral sex, and I became very comfortable with it, even looking forward to the sensations it brought. After a time of doing this, he would make sure that the whole area was very juicy, and using his mouth on my clit, inserting fingers into my vagina, would also begin to insert his little finger into my anus - just a little at first, graduallly more and more, until his pinky finger was fully inserted at the same time as he was stimulating my clit and the g-spot. Talk about squirting! This multiple stimulation had me going like nothing else ever had. As we continued to experiment, he became bolder and bolder with his attentions to my ass - licking, deeper and more purposeful licking and stimulating, kissing, really tender, very sweet, and so incredibly respectful. In talking to him about how absolutely amazing this felt, he could verbalize to me that he felt if he could not love it, lick it, and kiss it, then he had no business wanting to fuck it. As weird as this may sound, that's what flipped the switch for me - his reverence and appreciation for it and refusal to see my ass as anything nasty or dirty (although never fear, he was always careful with cleanliness rules, no double dipping or switching penetration fingers, etc). At that point, I knew it would be fine for him to penetrate with his penis - and that I was ready and wanted it, badly. I also knew that he would stop instantly if it became uncomfortable or if I changed my mind, and that it would be safe for me to try. To make a long story short - we have had anal sex twice, and as long as he can lick and kiss my ass as sweetly and reverently as he has been, I will do it again and again. I do not see it replacing vaginal sex or even oral sex for me, though. It doesn't feel as good as vaginal to me, but it's not painful, nothing hurts, and I have had no ill effects - and my partner loves it. So guys, it can happen. Two years ago I would not have even considered it, and would probably have thought that the very idea was disgusting - but how wrong I was, and how happy I am that I met the man who had the patience and respect to allow this to happen. And that is just how you do it.

I have to add that I think this is the hottest thing, ever. My current partner is into this, and he has no problem with going down on me after he has cum inside me to "clean things up". It makes me cum instantly again, the feelings are incredible. He also loves for me to save some for him if he cums in my mouth, and kiss him with a mouthful of his cum. Sharing these things is incredibly intimate, and makes for such sweet sexual experimentation. Guys, try it - it won't kill you, and your partner will be so incredibly turned on that you will be amazed and will wonder why you waited so long to experience it.