Blood

[Emideedoo]

Aaaalright, well, I decided to step up the size in my toys. Tentatively. Carefully. Slowly. With lots of lube.

I went from a 1" dildo to a 1.25" vibrator, which was uncomfortable but doable, to a 1.5" rabbit. And, while the head's a pain to squeeze in past the second tight spot, I can get it in and rock it rather than thrust without any real issue while I'm aroused... But it's impossible to miss that the first time I got a few blood streaks on my fingers afterward, and tonight I got the usual little lube puddle with a red coloration on my white robe.

Should I be worried, or just take this as a normal oops for a virgin playing with wider toys? I do have to give it a firm push to go in, and it's still an uncomfortable stretch going in, but it doesn't really feel like I'm forcing it past what I can handle since it's a softer material. Buying the 1.5" was initially an accident since I did my last shopping with a tired head, but I kind of like this new thing and I want to keep using it. I don't want to hurt myself or get an infection if I maybe need a few days to heal after a rip, though.

Maybe I'm fussing over it too much. I felt sore, but that passed and I'm not in any pain.

[WendyNY]

I suppose I would just chalk it up to the fact that you are a virgin. (I mean---if you are concerned you could ask your doctor !! Well, maybe not...... ) I'm sure Doctors have heard it all though ! Honestly------ it will take awhile for the area to become stretched enough and eventually the pain will go away. There is a bit of blood after real penetration for the first time. I'm sure it varies from woman to woman also. I read this to my husband and told him that I'd wished I had used toys before we had sex for the first time !! Perhaps there wouldn't have been so much pain for me and things might have been different. While there were sex toys out there at that time-- it was NOTHING like it is today !! There are many more varieties to choose from and great sites like this one to get information about it.

Just go slow, start out with the smaller toys at first and you can gradually increaase the size as your body becomes more comfortable with them. And RELAX-----the more aroused you are, the less pain you will feel.

[Emideedoo]

I just wonder how gradually it should be. Hours, days, weeks, months?

I've been fiddling with the 1 and 1.25" toys for a few weeks now, and 1.5" seemed to be the next size up as far as I could tell. I can't use firmer toys because they hurt me, but I've been doing good with the softer ones with jelly or silicone.

The non-painful sex was actually the logic that got me to have the nerve to buy my first toys. I'm nowhere near ready for sex with anyone, but I like being prepared for the future. I guess I'm being a little impatient since the majority of the nicer toys that I want to try seem to be on the larger side.

[Tyger]

It's sounding to me like you could be tearing your hymen, but just a little bit here and there, especially if you're continuing to see blood after playing. You have a couple of choices here (in my opinion).

One, you could just "pop" your own cherry, so to speak, and then after a moment of slight pain, the hymen will be gone. If you're nervous about the pain/blood, this could also be why you're experiencing pain as well. If you're nervous and not fully aroused, you can cause your muscles to clench, and with you being a virgin/small, that can cause you to have more pain. Try to learn to relax. Just remember, when the hymen breaks, yes, you probably will feel a slight pain that ebbs away after a few minutes. When I had sex for the first time, it hurt for a bit, kinda like when you scrape your knee really bad, then burned for a bit. I was sore the next day, and after a few more times of sex, the pain was gone. But, when you're having sex by yourself, you can hold yourself back, instinctively, because you're scared of the pain. How long it takes depends on you. Each woman's body is different, so nobody can say for sure how long your pain will last. Though, it's not as bad once the hymen is gone, since there's nothing left to tear/rip. Again, you'll probably feel a burning (where the edges of the hymen are) until they're healed up.

Your vaginal area heals rather quickly, and shouldn't (in many cases) take more than a couple of days of healing, if left alone to do so. If the hymen's still htere, you'll probably still have pain.

The other option is to go back to smaller toys, and wait for a man to come along that's right for you, and, eventually, having sex with him to fully break your hymen (among other deep things). But, I'm not suggesting you just go out and find a guy to "pop your cherry" just for the sake of doing it by any means!!!

Anyway, I hope this helps.

[Emideedoo]

If you're nervous and not fully aroused, you can cause your muscles to clench, and with you being a virgin/small, that can cause you to have more pain.

Haha, jeez, that could be a problem. Not that I get nervous, but when something feels good or if I'm getting closer to orgasm, I always always always clench down really hard because I like the pressure on the spot I'm hitting. I don't really notice discomfort anymore until I'm finished at that point, so maybe I'm a little too rough in the moment. I'm a lot more careful when I'm just inserting at the start, since it's getting the head in past the tight point that really makes me wince.

[Tyger]

Sounds to me like you may be hitting part of your G-Spot, which is a good thing! If it's not due to nerves, then I would say that you're probably slightly tearing at your hymen then, but not all the way.

So, it doesn't hurt WHILE you're playing? As a virgin, your body has to get use to things going up inside you. How long have you been experimenting with larger, deeper penetrating toys?

And, yes, even for us, um, ahem, more experienced people, a rough night of sex can leave us pleasantly sore in the morning as well, so that's normal. And, yes, we can still even bleed if it was rough.

[Emideedoo]

So, it doesn't hurt WHILE you're playing? As a virgin, your body has to get use to things going up inside you. How long have you been experimenting with larger, deeper penetrating toys?

It hurts a bit, if I angle it certain ways or pull the head back toward the front, since that's where things are tight and iffy. The bigger toys, I've only been able to fit in at all the past couple weeks or so. I can't insert firm ones at all, they have to be soft and flexible or I'm in pain- I can put in the 1.5" vibe with the jelly coating, but my 1.25" kegals with tiny nubs feels like I'm trying to insert nails because there's no give. I think the nubs get caught on the skin around my opening too, so there's really no way to put those balls in without hurting myself.

I did actually find my G-spot, pretty easily. :} I had been feeling too far back, but it's right in the front where crooking the fingers can reach. Only problem is, my fingers get tired before they can do any good, and I don't have any curved toys. The rabbit KIND OF hits it with the ridge of the head sometimes, but pulling it to the front makes me sore since it's big. Dilemma!

It's fun experimenting. I had assumed my hymen was too stretched out to be an issue since I use tampons.

[Emideedoo]

Ok, now that a few days have passed, I think the hymen theory was spot on. I used the rabbit today without ANY of the usual discomfort, and I actually feel like I could use something larger now that the tightness has some give and I know how to position right.

[Tyger]

It's fun experimenting. I had assumed my hymen was too stretched out to be an issue since I use tampons.

I'm glad that you aren't having pain anymore. I just wanted to clear up a misconception about tampons. Tampons are safe for virgins to use as well since they don't go up as far as you might think, so they don't tear the hymen. Most virgins don't care for them, because it feels "weird", but you can safely use a tampon and still be considered intact. It's a common misconception, so don't feel bad.

[Emideedoo]

Isn't the hymen right at the opening? That's what I've seen in diagrams, who knows.

[Tyger]

No, it's not right at the opening, it's up inside a bit. Not exactly sure of how high, but it's up inside. I'll research & let you know.

[Tyger]

No, it's not right at the opening, it's up inside a bit. Not exactly sure of how high, but it's up inside. I'll research & let you know.

OK, so, I will say it, I am WRONG. It is right at the opening. HOWEVER, there is a hole in the center of it, which small/thin things can pass thru ok, like a tampon, and so that the blood from your period can come out, and other fluids. Penises (and toys) are wider, and that causes the tearing that everyone is so nervous about.

[Emideedoo]

Haha, I don't blame you for the confusion! I asked my own mother and she thought the same thing as you did, so I looked it up too to double check. She was so shocked to find out she was wrong.

They come in all different shapes and thicknesses, some people don't even have one from the start, so it's no wonder that it's such a mystery.

[bazil323]

In this modern world where girls actually get to run around and do more physical activity, the hymen is, at least partially, torn/damaged long before anything is ever inserted. That doesn't mean that it won't be uncomfortable, painful, or make you bleed the first few times anyway. There is a certain amount of stretching that needs to be done, and in the heat of the moment, we don't realize what's going on until we're done and notice the blood or the twinge of discomfort.

I've been married for 4-1/2 years and have played with toys for long before that, and I still get some slight pinkish tinge when I had a particularly vigorous playtime, whether with toys or hubby. So, don't be too surprised if it happens again! If it keeps happening or starts getting uncomfortable during, I'd see a doctor. Since it seems to be getting better, I wouldn't worry too much.

[Emideedoo]

I knew mine was still around, kind of. The one time I had a papsmear, the lady was scared to poke me with a Q-tip because of it for crying out loud- but I hadn't been using tampons because they hurt and I never even used my fingers down there at the time, so I figured maybe things had weathered away after a couple years, haha. I don't know what I thought, really, I just didn't think of it anymore once I got the tampons to stop stinging.

Still, it didn't hurt enough for me to stop what I was doing when it tore, so I guess I won't worry about it possibly tearing more later. I was more scared that maybe I'd mangled something else in there. The most random thoughts jump in when you look down and unexpectedly see blood somewhere. *facepalm*

[Lisa's Man]

The most random thoughts jump in when you look down and unexpectedly see blood somewhere. *facepalm*

Trying being a guy and have what looks like blood coming out of your penis. Talk about freaking out, I was ready to call 911 and have an ambulance come take me to the ER. A call to my GP calmed me down a bit and after a visit, turns out it was just a bad bladder infection. (I USED to be horrible about drinking enough water in the hot summer days.. THIS cured me.)