Girlfriend Use Vibe In Front Of Me

[telecom69]

I'm still trying to get my gf to use her vibe in front of me by herself. I don't ever pressure her to do it, but just bring it up now and then when I feel like she may be comfortable with it. She is still shy, but a lot better than she used to be. She knows I would like her to use it in front of me by herself and knows I would like to watch her (fantasy of mine), but says she is still just to embarrased. What have other women out there done to get over this? We've been together about 19 months.

Telecom

[hrnychick]

Telecom dont feel as if she is the only one like this I was too. I NEVER ever would have touched myself or used vibe in front of hubby.....after ME being in what I call a sexual rut I thought what could I do to spice things up and get some spark back. Then I thought why not play.....while he watches. I too am shy but i think since we have been together for so long it was easy to take that chance. So I started off with just using my fingers for "the show" and seeing and knowing just how much he enjoyed it made the upgrade to vibe very easy. I think you are dealing with it the correct way as in NOT rushing her.....we all do things in our own time.....take it from one who knows.....the more you have her trust the more you help her relax and ofcourse the more she knows it will turn both you on to no end im sure she will be putting on a "show" for you soon. If she is like me then once she starts she just wont stop.

Im not sure if there is a real answer to your question because it has to do with her and her level of shyness but i hope this helps you out some......good luck......keep us posted

Hrnychick

[ambrelyn]

My fiancee wanted me to play with myself infront of him. I couldn't at first. I blushed from head to toe just thinking about it. I think alot of it has to do with us being 'taught' that masterbating is such a bad thing when we're young. We feel guilty about pleasing ourselves this way. Deep down, I really wanted to do this for him, but I was so embarrased. Finally, one time, he just took my hand and put it down there while he was inside me. Now, I'm not necessarily saying you should do this. I'm really into that kind of control, she may not be and might get pissed if you tried that. But maybe see if she'll do it while you're inside her to increase the sensation for her. It will gradually build up from there once she gets more comfortable. And if you ever get her to play even just a tiny bit, be sure to rave over it and tell her how much you loved it, how hot it made you. That will encourage her even more. I know it worked for me. Just knowing I could make him that hot, helped me get right over my shyness.

[chickenmom]

I was also one who was sexually shy until recently. I would never have masturbated, much less touch myself in front of my hubby. Now, no problem. Give her more time. Just reassure her tell her how sexy she is, how wonderful, etc. Her confidence will help her get over her shyness in the end. Just be patient.

[Tyger]

I have to agree with Bondage on this one.

A lot of us are either brought up thinking that masturbation is bad, the man is suppose to please you-and that's it, using sex toys is "wrong", the negative masturbation list seems to go on and on and on!!

It's GREAT that you're not rushing her into doing anything that would make her uncomfortable. Some men, like my husband, are insecure about their women using toys, thinking that it will be a replacement, instead of enhancing. I'm slowly working on him though!! He's getting there!! It's wonderful that you are so open-minded and comfortable with yourself too!!

If you want a couple of suggestions, maybe tell her, that instead of "watching" her the first time, or a couple of times, you want to "hear" her do it. Suggest that she use her toy underneath the sheets. Even offer to blindfold yourself . That would be cool! Then you could hear what she's doing, maybe even touching yourself as you get more and more excited. Seeing the "power" she has over your excitement may make her a bit more comfortable with it.

And/or watch some porn together, and suggest that she use her toy, and you "watch" the tv, maybe sneak a glance at her starting to play with herself.

Just give her some time. It's taken me almost 5 yrs with my husband!! He's from the south and was raised with "old school" beliefs too. But the end result is worth it.