How Did You First Introduce A Sex Toy To Your Partner?

[Tyger]

So, did you sneak in that trusty little bullet? Did you let them "catch" you with your fav dildo? Did you introduce them, and let them get aquainted? Did you give it as a gift?

Tell us, how'd ya do it?

[whittibo]

Well all this sex as fun stuff is new to us, it was just 'plain old vanilla' and boring, which is why it rarely happened. About a month ago I decided it was going to change and ordered some very mild stuff, the first order was just a cock ring and some cherry tasting (which doesn't taste) sparkly dusting powder. I thought with the powder, we could each use it as a signal to the other that we wanted sex. If he saw it on me, he would know I wanted it, if it was left out on the counter, I would know he did. But since we started having fun sex, we haven't really stopped.

But when I ordered the stuff, I told him I ordered some "toys" for him and that he better open his box in private. He didn't really believe me and is very modest, so I kept reminding him that his box of toys would arrive soon. Took two stupid weeks to get it!~ that was the longest two weeks ever, and I will never order from that company again.

Anyway, he did finally open the box, as embarrassed as he was. And we used the powder right away, but still haven't used the ring.

The last order I placed was from Too Timid and included the free G-spot stimulator, that was the first "real toy" I have ever ordered/bought before. I also got a pouch from another company and a wedge pillow thing to match, and when I got the Too Timid order, I just placed all the items in the pouch, and left it on his nightstand and told him there was a surprise there for him. He never did get anything out, they have been there awhile now. So a few nights ago, he was not in the mood, but I was, and he still hasn't perfected fingering me, and isn't really into going down on me, so I reached over and grabbed the stimulator and handed it to him. He didn't insert it, but did use it on me. I think he might have been a bit mortified about the whole thing. :s

I think I'll lay off the toys for awhile, we have enough things now to get us started playing, and I just want to get him used to these before I spring anything else on him. I did tell him I was going to order this lounge chair made specifically for sex, even showed him the pictures and asked what color to order, he helped me decide, but I need to wait till we move and get into our new house.

I also got the double bullet from Too Timid, that just got here yesterday. I hid it right away, I don't think him OR I are ready for that just yet. Whew!

[Mikayla1]

Well, my first long-term boyfriend (bondage guy) actually introduced toys to me (LOTS of TOYS!) but I continued to use them after we split up. I just kind of let my boyfriends know I was interested in clitoral stimulation and anal stimulation during sex.

With my hubby it was a bit differetn - he was so shy sexually. I basically kept them hid for a while, then one night brought out my favorite dildo and asked him to fuck me with it. He looked a little shocked, but took it and REALLY enjoyed watching it go in and out. He even turned the lights on to watch in full light!

So, I suppose the way I have always done it is just to "whip it out" so to speak!

[Blush]

My husband gave me my first dildo, said he wanted to watch me use it and we never looked back...

We loved going to the adult store together, great fun!

[Valntyn]

I'd been lurking here at TooTimid for a while, when one day I saw one of the freebie offers was a glittery, pretty pink bullet. My husband knew I'd been visiting TT regularly and we'd mentioned toys here and there - though I think both of us were a little embarrassed to REALLY discuss them. I really wanted to try one, though, so one day I just ordered it! It was small and "unintimidating," my hope being that I wouldn't scare my hubby away from the idea. I figured the worst that would happen was that I'd be out shipping and handling, but we'd know if it wasn't for us.

Glad I risked that few dollars. *rofl*

[dark_star]

I've always had a fetish for using a toy on a girl and was lucky enough to introduce a gf and a fwb to the vibrator world. The first time i was doing an internship over the summer away from college, so in other words we were in a long distance relationship, and she decided to come for a visit over fourth of july weekend. I figured she might want some help getting off since i wont be around for a while, so i went and bought her a vibrator at the local sex shop. The girl at the shop was quite helpful and convinced me to buy the pricey but universally liked 7th Heaven Platinum G-Spot vibrator. It looks a little something like this:

She, to this day, enjoys it very much. The only problem was that when she left after visiting she had her bag inspected at the airport and some people in line got to see her new gift.

The other girl i simply told her i enjoyed using toys with sex so she proposed we go shopping at the local sex shop. I was kinda strapped for cash so we had to buy a cheap one. Still, she liked the experiance.... she even bought one of those butterfly vibes shortly thereafter.

[clewing]

It depends on if you count a regular vibrator as a sex toy or not. I had been using a regular vibrator for years, after a former boyfriend showed me that the vibrating attachment on my manicure/facial set could be used for more than facials! After that, I've always had one of the vibrators/massagers you can buy, and have been through about four different ones. Before that, I could never have an orgasm masturbating, and would often be very frustrated when my boyfriend was not around (he was a surveyer and traveled a lot). He also bought one of the old fashioned, straight, plastic vibrators for me (remember, this was 35 years ago) and some French ticklers (do they still make those, do they call them that any more?) which really didn't do much for me. I loved my vibrator and used it alone and with him.

Fast forward four years. My boyfriend is now my ex-boyfriend after telling me that he still doesn't want to get married, but he will marry me to keep me from marrying anyone else (so romantic!!!). My now husband has also broken up with his fiance, because he realized the only reason he was engaged to her is because they had sex, and he felt it was the honorable thing to do, and he didn't really love her. He and I have been friends for four months--playing chess and cards, fishing together, etc., but all strictly platonic (later to find out he had been in love with me the entire time, but thought I was out of reach because of our exes). I'm complaining to a girlfriend that there are no good, decent men left and she grabs me by the hand and tells me "Would you just open your eyes and look next door!" (yes, he was the boy next door). I remember that conversation so vividly. A couple days later, I asked him over to change my light bulb (it was too high for me to reach), and I was helping him, standing just a few inches from him with both of our arms raised over our heads, there was like this static electricity going through us (and it wasn't from the light fixture!). A few days later I invited him for dinner.....and more.

About the third or fourth time my husband and I made love (this was before we were married), I pulled out the vibrator. At that time I loved to be on top and riding away, and place the vibrator on my clit. When he saw what type of orgasms I had with that, he loved it and never minded me using it, and enjoyed using it on me.

I always got excited looking at sex toys in magazines and later on-line, but they were always outside of our budget. After five years at a very stressful job where my libido was dropping at a ratio of how much more stress was being put on me, I left that job, and we were looking for something to spice up our sex life, which at that time was almost non-existant. He suggested some toys for me, and I started searching online. I googled "dildoes" and was looking through the different sites. I found one, not Too Timid, and was starting my order, but got interupted in the middle of it. Then I stopped and fixed breakfast, and in the middle of breakfast the phone rings and it was this company asking me if I needed help completing my order! That ticked me off--I felt that was too much of an invasion of my privacy! So, I closed down that order, never completed it, and the next website I clicked on was Too Timid. I am so glad that happened, because Too Timid has been wonderful!

That was the start of our recent purchase of toys, and really was the beginning of the next phase of our sex life. The first ones I bought were a dual vibrator and clit stimulator, weighted pleasure balls, two movies (what he wanted, but I've started enjoying them, too), and some Viva cream (highly recommend!). We've placed five more orders since then.

Long answer for a short question, but as I started thinking back about it, I started remembering other things. Hope I didn't bore anyone!

[whittibo]

some Viva cream (highly recommend!).

Good to know the Viva cream comes highly recommeded. I bought some but haven't tried it yet.

[Tyger]

(I got some Viva cream in with one of the TT toys, and it was awesome!!)

OK, as for me, I have always been pretty forthcoming (imagine that) when it comes to me liking toys. My 4th boyfriend ever, decided he wanted to give me something fun, and gave me one of those basic vibrators, my first ever, and I've been hooked ever since.

I usually broach the subject by "jokingly" pointing out sex shops, and then getting them to go in (usually I am driving, and KNOW I am going to go in, but they have no clue where I truly intend to go). We end up buying something, a toy or video. Then, it progresses from there.

[Sin_Alas]

I'm with whittibo pretty much. Vanilla (with toppings) is where we're stuck. I got my first vibrator from/with my fiance, who dragged me into a Spencer's (the ever-popular gag gift shop!) and pretty much on a whim he made me pick one of the brightly colored hard plastic vibrators they carry in their little collection of sex toys. He did it mostly because he thought it was cute to make me turn bright red in public (which I did), though, and we didn't use it much together because he admitted he was uncomfortable using toys - I think he's still a little insecure about his own abilities (which are pretty damn good). The only thing he still breaks out from that first foray into toys is the pair of black fuzzy handcuffs he ordered at my request. He'd had a few body paints and cheap flavored massage oils before that, from a past gf, but they'd rarely used them, and we stopped after a while too.

Anyway, I was intrigued by the vibrator but it was awfully loud and not very comfortable for longer sessions, so I finally got the money and courage to get some more toys. First it was some warming massage oil and a DVD, which I actually bought in Mexico last summer (study abroad, he jokingly told me to bring him back porn, lol). That, again, only lasted a few sessions between us. So I finally went all-out and bought a g-spot vibrator and a nice, slick acrylic wand which has become my mystery toy of sorts. I am still awkward with it but I occasionally use it on myself and it's a fantastic choice for anywhere and any way.

He still ignores the toys and oils but I am getting creative and having fun, while waiting for a chance to reintroduce him to the joys of playing.