Horney

[hunter]

My wife & I have been married for several years & weve always had a great maariage,but when it comes to sex, she only wants it maybe once a month. When we do have sex I always try to make sure that she is pleasured before I even think about getting off. I am pretty much willing to try anything in bed to make it more enjoyable for her, & since weve been together she has always had multiple orgasams,& she seems to enjoy herself. I have always worried that its the size of my penis that is the problem. Its only about 6".My problem is that Im horney 24 hours a day & other than masterbation & flirting Ive always stayed true to my wife. What can I do?

[hrnychick]

from my point of view there is nothing wrong with you.....but as far as your wife and her only wanting sex once a month if that maybe she should talk to a doctor to see why she is maybe the problem.....something is lacking somewhere....does she work full time? do you have kids? maybe if not a medical problem it can be she is just to stressed and not in the mood....you can help change that by cooking dinner, taking care of the kids in order to give her some time to herslef, helping around the house WITHOUT being asked.....nothing turns on a women more then a guy helping around the house without being asked to lol....

I can say well at least you are getting it once a month....but what if that stops for some reason?? This is why i think you should sit down and have a nice talk with your wife and try to find out if its stress or something more....,,,Maybe she would like more romance to help her get in the mood who knows it could be something simple or something more so again i suggest a good chat with her

The bright spot to this is that you said you pleasure her first and she has multi Os.....its nice to know that you arent like morst men and only thinking of yourself whtn it comes to sex and since she does get to the big O that is a good sign,,,,,,she seems to be still turned on by you,,,,,some women have hormone problems and the big O is just not reached....and since you said you said you seem to be hrny 24/7 im happy to hear that you stay true to your wife....lets face it most men in your situation would have found sex someplace else and would have cheated by now.....so sit down have a talk and see what you both need to do to improve the sex life..

hope all goes well......best wishes for a happy sex life

Hrnychick

[foryoureyesonly]

I am certainly not a "sexpert" and yes, this will be my first post but I can sympathize with your wife and maybe offer some additional info. I have been married 21+ years. Sex had always been a once or twice a month thing with me as well. My DH was incredibly patient (as it sounds you have been) and tried everyting to improve things. Nothing seemed to help. It wasn't him at all, I was plagued with urinary tract infections it seemed every time we had sex, yeast infections, lack of wetness. You name it I seemed to have it at one time or another. This can be a medical issue and not a lack of desire at all. TALK, TALK, TALK to her. As a previous poster said, you must make her talk to you. I also found a doctor I finally felt comfortable discussing this stuff with. He has been a huge help with all of my medical issues and also figured out that I have probably been experiencing some depression along the way. With the right meds and alot of talking and understanding, I have come a long way. I learned over time little tips that have helped me tremendously, like peeing after sex EVERY time. No more UTIs. Eating yogurt, no more yeast. Lots of foreplay, no more lack of wetness. You will never know the answer if you don't communicate. I also learned I am a very visual person. I really like porn and I also like to read racy books (as in X-rated, not just romance stuff). I have found that by watching and reading I can pretty much be ready to go at any time. Our sex life has improved unbelievably in the last year and my DH cannot believe the stuff I want to try now. (Oh my god, we are even discussing anal at this time!) There is hope. You just have to talk to know what might work. Please understand, I don't by any means think that this will clear up in a few days or with the right pill. That's not how it works. But you really seem to love and care about her so don't give up. You two can overcome this with love and patience and LOTS of talking. Good luck to you both.

[sam7970]

Great advice from Tarps. Women can be horney as hell, but just can't enjoy sex because it is uncomfortable or hurts like HELL due to other medical conditions or even our diets. Women have to be very intimate and intune with their bodies to figure out exactly what is going on, and yes every thing we do, eat, drink, and think does affect our bodies, especially our vaginas.

[Tyger]

I can answer this one as well!!!

I am a mother of a a very active 3 yr old girl. I also work nights (8p.m.-2a.m.) as a cashier at Wal*Mart. I nap when my daughter naps.

Although I enjoy sex, whether solo or with my husband, I am rarely IN THE MOOD!!! Once a month is about it for me too. Imagine that!! Whether it be solo or with my hubby, I just don't want to do it much. I get urges, but then I get too tired.

I am tired A LOT!! I also am "overwieght" in my eyes. I am 5'9" and in a size 10-12. Laugh if you will, but I was a size 6 before I had our child. So, to me, I am "fat". I don't feel attractive anymore. I get complimented and even flirted with, but it's that whole mind-set. It sucks. It's on me, and I know it.

I am dieting, and trying to exercise. For me, it's my self-esteem. Plus the fact that I DO NOT want anymore kids, so we use condoms AND vaginal foam too.

I hope this wifey's point of view helped!!

[always]

Unlike men, women need to be in the right mind set. Men can be talked into sex almost every time their partner wants it, but in order for many women to be in the mood, they need to feel (emotionally)comfortable. I think that if men are willing to consider and try to understand it, they will get their partner in the mood much more often. Some women like to fuck, but many want to make love. Often times, men just want to fuck.

When my wife is not in the mood, she will often stroke my cock with her hand because she loves me and knows I need it more often than she does. She also masturbates a lot, so just like men, sometimes that is preferred over actual sex.