Best Oral For A Women

[a0602794]

I am a newbie and have loved reading all of posts and learning.

What I want to know is how to give the best oral to my wife (15 years).

Before kids, she loved it. After kids, she thinks that since she is a mother, that she should not do it. However, on occassion she will let me because she know that I enjoy doing it to her. I love it when she is about to cum and she pulls my head in tight almost smothering me in her.

She has started to open up to new things slightly. A few months ago, I introduced her to her first vib and at first she was reluctant but was willing to try it. Now she likes it and on occasion when she needs a little something extra to get started, she will ask for it.

What I want to learn is how to give the best oral that I can so that she will come back asking for more.

So ladies, tell me what you like and how you like it done. Guys, if you know of some great techniques, I am eager to learn.

I figure that since I have limited opportunities, when the opportunity presents itself I must put by best mouth and tongue forward.

Thanks

[telecom69]

I am a newbie and have loved reading all of posts and learning.

What I want to know is how to give the best oral to my wife (15 years).

Before kids, she loved it. After kids, she thinks that since she is a mother, that she should not do it. However, on occassion she will let me because she know that I enjoy doing it to her. I love it when she is about to cum and she pulls my head in tight almost smothering me in her.

She has started to open up to new things slightly. A few months ago, I introduced her to her first vib and at first she was reluctant but was willing to try it. Now she likes it and on occasion when she needs a little something extra to get started, she will ask for it.

What I want to learn is how to give the best oral that I can so that she will come back asking for more.

So ladies, tell me what you like and how you like it done. Guys, if you know of some great techniques, I am eager to learn.

I figure that since I have limited opportunities, when the opportunity presents itself I must put by best mouth and tongue forward.

Thanks

Well, the best way for you to give good oral is to listen to your wife and have HER tell you what feels best. She is responsible for this to, contrary to what some think. If she is quiet and doesn't give feedback, listen for her moans, hip movements, breathing, pace, etc. Don't go right for it, a lot of teasing is fun. Caress her all over, easy kisses on the stomach and thighs, etc. and show the affection and tenderness before heading south. The tounge and vibe together can be nice to.

Telecom

[hrnychick]

I agree with the other posts your wife has to tell you what she likes and doesnt like for you to really be able to give her the best oral ever.

As for the part of your post that said she is a mom and doesnt think she should do it. I have to say I to have been down that road. After having kids the last thing i wanted to do was to have sex, Sex of any type. The more kids the worse it became.

Knowing that it wasnt fair to my hubby i would still "do it" but i had the attitude of lets get this over with. I knew I had to get out of this state of mind. Thats when i started to really focus on the sex we had. Telling him what i liked and didnt like. Telling him how to touch, if he should go faster or slower etc.....plus i started to really explore my own body so i could better instruct him on what i liked and didnt.

I also told him I would be more "in the mood" if he took care of the kids or did the other little things around the house so i didnt have to and i could take a nice long bath and relax and then i wouldnt be so tired or stressed for sex.

That is the best thing a man can do for his wife to get her in the mood.....because you cant just expect us to go from mommy to feeling sexy in seconds.

Since those changes took place I look forward to sex. I have (like your wife) really opened up to a lot more and also this site has helped out with that as well. So you really have to ask her what she wants etc.....dont know if this will really help you at all but i like a lot of foreplay.

My tits have to be played with that is a must.....as far as the oral I like him to go slow and it cant be really soaking wet or the feeling just isnt there (maybe thats just me but thats what i like) If for some reason he isnt hitting that certain spot i will tell him til he finds it. I also do this when he is just rubbing me down there as well cause sometimes he just goes to fast or a bit to hard and that fine when im close to cumming but at the start i need it to be the way i like it.

Maybe your wife can try this as well it worked for us......I started to touch myself and play while he played with my tits and kissed me etc......now mind you we dont do it this way all the time but i know what i like and just where to touch myself and if pressed for time cause of the kids this really gets things going at a much faster pace.

Hope this helps you in some way......keep us posted

[hrnychick]

Hornychick: and others. Please, take your husband's hand in yours and show him how you masturbate yourself. That is the only way he can learn what trips your trigger! Really. Don't be letting him play the guessing game. Teach him how to pleasure you. Once that is learned, you are assured of having orgasms, and you both then can try variations and other things to have fun, knowing if everything new you try fails, you can always go back to the tried and true.

I encourage both men and women married with kids to take their morning showers together, and play with each other when you are both rested. Set the aram clock earlier so you can play every day. Getting a woman happy, and aroused in the morning will help her think of those feelings all day long- my wife used to have ' accidental" orgasms during the day if she moved certain ways against her very sensitive tissues- and be more interested in being loved when you get home from work. It doesn't take much touching between a man and woman, even in front of the kids, to keep yer arounsed. I do agree that many husbands could help their sex lives if they take over supervising the kids before and after dinner so that thier wives can take a break and relax. But no wife of mine got to take a bubble bath unless I was in the bath with her! She's not the only one who needs to relax at the end of a day!

Have fun.

Howard I have done that and although it has worked its not a given that each and every time he goes down on me or rubs me he hits that spot with out a bit of "coaching" but after I tell him just what to do I have no trouble in getting to the big O......Never gone without one yet.....either by his touching licking or me playing......just thought i would clear that up cause it seemed like you thought there were times that he couldnt bring me to O.

As for the getting up early and shower together that is a great idea and im sure it would work for most but my hubby goes to work at 3am or earlier so the shower thing for me is out.....at least not doing it at that time of day......but great idea never the less.

[nosleepnmesa]

I have to tend to lean a little on Howards last post. I am a mother of five children and 1 being extremely asthmatic and I am up numerous times during the night with him and his breathing treatments ect.... The morning shower thing works well but upon the advice of Howard and Makayla my sex life is better.

My hubby has to get up at 3am every morning to go to work. I dont get to bed tell sometimes as late as 11pm then I am up at 2am giving my son his meds. I also have graves disease a thyroid disorder which I have had a complete Tyroidectomy.I have to agree with Howard me being married for 7 yrs and having five children and not getting alot of sleep when I wake up to get the little one his meds and I am horney as usual sense I seem to be that way all the time. I do kiss around his cock ect and get him aroused. HE wakes up and he is great. I feel that when I do get back to sleep I fall asleep much faster.

Learning I have had five children and needless to say I had a little bit of a problem after my first letting my SO go down on me. I think the reason at the time was I was sore and didnt feel very sexy at the time in fact it took almost a year for me to allow him to again, but that of course was after my first child. After that and long talks I LOVE HIM TO !!!!

My hubby will first start at my tummy and kiss, nibble his way down and caress me with his hands ect, rubbing my clit with his thumb. He does all this to relax me since we talked about. Then he works his way down, at times when he is licking and sucking on my glit he will insert a finger or if I ask a toy.

Good luck and keep us informed. This site and all the people hear have sure help me in ways that have spark my sex life.

Good luck to you

Katprr

[Tyger]

Oral sex, for both partners, requires much feed back, and I do mean verbal. Moans are nice, twitches are better, and clamping one's head while thanking the good Lord is best, but verbal gets you there.

I laughed a lot when I read this, not only cuz it was funny, but because it is true!!

The other thing I have to agree on, and relate too, is having Daddy help with the kids and some minor housework to help Mommy relax, so later on she can be WIFE (they're different roles, hence the different terms). You can't really go from picking up toys, cleaning diapers, scrubbing peas off the floor, to instant sex kitten.

Ever since having my daughter, I too, haven't really wanted a lot of sex, much to the grumblings of hubby. Self-esteem issues, lack of help around the house, no quality alone time, and lack of sleep, well, they all take a toll on one's sex life. Plus, I work nights, he works days, so we both get little sleep. And, even though mothers sometimes can "go right back to sleep" after they have satisfied their husbands, it is not always the case. Esp. with newborns. Dr's aren't kidding when they tell a new mother "sleep when the baby sleeps" cuz that's the only sleep they can get! And I'm not sure about the men, but when I get little to no sleep, the eruption of Mt. Vesuvius ain't got nothin' on me!! It's not pretty, and the LAST thing I want is to be touched. I am, in expert's opinions, a BITCH when I have little sleep. And I admit it. So, yes, been there, doing that, and our daughter is 3!!

The best thing to do, is to help her out-without being asked (this will mean more than a bouquet of roses~trust me!), be patient, show appreciation, help her out (worth mentioning twice), give sincere compliments, not only of how good a mother she is and what a good job she is doing, but sincerely how attractive you find her.

[a0602794]

Thanks to all for your advice.

I really enjoy this sight and the answers that everybody gives. The answers and advice are not hard core porn type responses, but are advice to how to respect your lover and listen to their needs and wants while exploring and having some great sex at the same time.

Thanks to all for the advice and I will let you know how it goes when I get a chance to go south for some good times.

[mommy2krt]

well I have to say as a mother of a 2 yearold and a 7 week old our sex life is absolutly wonderful! My SO is great the first week I was home from the hospital he knew how sore and tired I was so he did everything he could to help so i could tend to our newborn and he helped with our 2 yearold. after he put her to bed he would cuddle with me on the couch and rub me and tell me how sexy i was and how much he wanted me. My SO is very lucky to have a woman who loves to give him bj's on demand, i dont know why I just love pleasing him and so within the first week home i gave him mind blowing oral almost everynight! now that we have resumed normal sex he has deffinately repaid the favor over and over! we have found that when we put the newborn on the same sleep pattern as our 2 yearold meaning they happen to sleep at the same time around 9 pm even though he wakes between 11 and 12 that gives us time for eachother to cuddle and watch a movie or lately actually almost nightly we take a shower together in the complete dark! it is absolutly amazing to feel his hnds on me and not be able to see anyhting but his sexy sillohette against the curtain and his arms around me, he makes me cum so hard sometimes he has to hold me up becuase my knees buckle so hard! its nice to find time whenever it is ! at night, the middle of the day or how about take the kids to grandmas for a couple hours and instead of actually going out go back to the house and make love anywhere! me and wes have found the couch after the kids go to sleep to be very nice! well heres to great sex after the years go by!

[damien]

I am a newbie and have loved reading all of posts and learning.

What I want to know is how to give the best oral to my wife (15 years).

I figure that since I have limited opportunities, when the opportunity presents itself I must put by best mouth and tongue forward.

Thanks

Ok. Yea me for I am new and wanted to take a few moments to post on this topic. I get the sense that you were looking for additional tips to add to what you already do, rather than encouragement for the action itself. This as with anything else, the first point to make, is that everyone is different and any ideaologies and tips on matters like this are subjective and/or objective and may or may not work for your partner. Or, for what it's worth, even for you. You have to have comfortability and a feeling of confidence in what you're doing, or it just simply won't work.

[Essential]-- Make sure you have the time to spend, kids asleep, kitchen/dinner cleaned up, whatever. Nothing that you'll have to get frustrated over afterwards that you have to jump up and go take care of! So......ONWARD!

1. As it's been stated in the forums over and over and over again, it is SO essential that you give her "calming". She has to be 1000% relaxed before anything will ever work!! In a case where I have the goal of doing this for my wife and want it to be something of a focal point; something that I want to do SPECIFICALLY for her, is starting with a simple massage. -- Not a day goes by in this fast paced world, whether she is a stay-at-home-24/7-overworked-mother-and-wife or someone that is an office worker that stress doesn't build up during the day. This can begin the (as I call it) "calming".....

Of course, this all seems so simple, but as I've had conversations of this before, it's always overlooked or passed over because of the focus on what you REALLY want to do, rather than the WHOLE PACKAGE! Start here..... -- And to note, there are SEVERAL good massage lotions available locally or online that are not too oily/greasy/etc. Maybe I'm not well versed here, but one that seems to work in my case is the K-Y massage oil (locally), a little goes a long way - use it sparingly and re-use as needed.

2. TALK TO HER! Maybe say to her "you don't have to respond, just enjoy". Tell her how much you care about her, that's she beautiful, that she's appreciated, etc....the key to this is MEAN IT. I say, just let it flow naturally as you speak to her about what you feel. Don't rehearse it! It will be too mechanical and you'll be more inclined to trip over words and supposed "connected thoughts" that you were piecing together. Just let it flow naturally.... But, don't gab too much, just relax and pay attention to her.... That's the main thing, right? (Say it with me) Right.......

3. Techniques of Contention: (a thought to think) Don't just throw away what you are comfortable with, try modifying or adding to what you do. Being as close to natural and focusing on her will make it work better.

(a). One of the things that I learned is, and most have either said on here or would agree with is - don't just go after her clit or deep inside her*. You can't dive in and just run amok! You kinda have to sneak up on it a little bit, if you will. *The irony here is that there are more nerve endings outside than inside.

(. Don't expect her to instantly flow like the nile cuz you've gotten this far. It's what has been stated on here as "build up" and "relaxation". It helps you, and most importantly - helps your wife.

4. The Tips:

HANDS FIRST!

(a). Take a few moments to lightly touch/glide all around with your fingers from top to bottom. Again, with the build up. Heightening her nerve endings/receptors to touch. While doing so, you can place light kisses on her inner thighs. Make note that you may not necessarily want to touch or pleasure her more sensative spots YET!

(. Next, don't ignore the hood! Put some light attention here and no direct stimulation to the clit itself. Because stimulating the hood is (what I believe) to be essential to the rest to come....ok, ha ha ha - joke over, but let's move on! With the clitoral hood, massage it back and forth and a little side to side. Again, no direct stimuli to the clit itself.

LET'S ADD A LITTLE TO IT.

©. Begin with the outer labia, kissing lightly and working your way around sensually. After all, this is from my perspective, more erotic and exotic to what what you may or may not have done in the past and still very calming and enjoyable.

(d). As you eventually move inward, use your lips and tongue (oh and yeah, don't stop using your hands now! maybe start giving her breasts/nipples a little light attention.) between the outer and inner labia. Working your way up and down and sides. Also making sure you still give the hood attention. A little clitoral stimulation (saying hello) can start, just don't make it your complete focal point yet. But, don't necessarily ignore it now. The hood and the stem are key in pleasure now, while beginning to use your tongue and lips.

Always monitor her reactions! Always, always, always!!

(e). Ahh, a DO NOT section! Do not maintain the same direction and action for way too long, there are tons of nerve endings that need attention too. It gives variation and stimulation. I guess for lack of a better way of saying it - it's like taking a medication for far too long, you build up a tolerance to it and it isn't working the same as it did in the beginning. Also, do not ignore her breasts, a little stimulation here might help as well. (at least for my wife it's a fast build when I caress and tease her nipples!)....

TIME TO FOCUS!

(f). Giving the clit it's just attentions and rewards.... As you now move here, start with slower circular patterns, don't press too hard - let it build.. Don't stay in the same direction for too too long - variation and stimulation, remember? Continue going over the hood & stem, not always giving her clit direct pressures and stimulation, give it a little and go back to circular patterns around it.

(g). Sway off... ever so often, as she's building, lick up and back down the stem and back to circ patterns.

(h). Here it comes! With your top lip rested right at the top of the opening, mouth completely AROUND her clit (not on it), still licking and starting to quicken the pace - use your upper lip/mouth to gently push down and up (not removing your mouth from being attached around her clitoris). This action exposes her clit, as the area starts to fully engorge with blood, sensation and pleasure. Just as she about to go, add just a little suction and bring your lips in a little bit (almost like clamping/holding her exposes clit right where it is), faster circles don't change pace at this point, it's pretty much the done deal!

(i). just as she is cumming, add just a little more suction (briefly/maybe 3-5 seconds, she may or may not try to pull away being too sensative and that's ok, back off a bit) and give her clit one last good direct lick. also, as a thought that has worked as well, lightly run your fingers down her side just as she's starting to cum (yeah, that almost tickle to goosebumps approach). Gives it a good full body tingle........

Eh, just a little something jotted down. I hope some of this helps as an addition to you (or anyone else) to what you already do. Never would I suggest something that would take you out of your comfort zone or confidence areas. Just a little something that I found works and works well. It's a cliff notes version, and albeit it's wordy, it's direct and may not take as much time to do this than it did for me to write this out.....

If you don't agree, eh.... It's just my thoughts and a suggestion. Hope it was what you were looking for....

Best of luck to you, Learning. Hopefully, something out of this post is viable for you to use!

Damien

[damien]

Damien: It is not really a disagreement, but I found that staying away from direct contact with the clitoris, its hood, etc. was a bigger turn on for women than the direct contact is. Often, if you are licking or sucking directly on the clit, women report they lose feeling there. Its temporary, but when they can't feel what you are doing, you may as well be reading a book!

You're absolutely right, maybe you misread what I wrote. No biggie. I tried to refer to passing at it from time to time, but being passive in direct contact - 95% of the time. And I constantly refered to varying up your movements and not just doing the same thing over and over in HOPES of her getting there. This was what I perceived to be more of what he was looking for - a more descript view of ideas to add to a situation where his opportunities were limited and trying to add to what he does to peak her interest to want it more and more. And trust me, I only wanna help when I can. I took no offense. Maybe just a little more clarification put here, but it was getting long enough as it was........

Besides, each person is truly different in what gets them there. Communication, as it is CONSTANTLY referred to on here, is SO important. Too often I've heard about physical relationships being a big cause for problems because the couple doesn't talk about it, discussing what does and does not feel good, what works and what doesn't.

Maybe instead of referring to "reading a book", maybe say "you may as well be trying to solving calculus problems"? Books can sometimes be interesting and exciting.....

I just hope any contributions I give on here are absolutely helpful for anyone, as well as they may be for me when/if I ask opinions. Have a good one!

Damien