KateElizabeth

Thanks!

Thanks, All. Okay, details. I wasn't even sure about going to the party, never having done that sort of thing before. But, a friend of mine talked me into it. I saw a Dom doing fireplay with a woman and I was fascinated. I went over to have a closer look and, as he was finishing, I suddenly found myself asking if I could be next. It just popped out! So, I took off everything but my stockings and stiletto boots and lay on my back on a table, hands over my head. I have never been naked in front of anyone but those closest to me before. Oddly, it didn't even faze me. The Dom started by putting mousse all over the front of my body and lighting it. It felt amazing. Watching the other woman, I had imagined that the mousse would inhibit the feeling of the flame, but it didn't at all. It simply spread it, everywhere. He did this several times and then got some flash paper and put it around my nipples and my pussy and lit that, too. Next, he got out a cane. He began to cane my entire body and the sting was delicious. A spectator spread my legs so that they draped over the sides of the table, giving the Dom better access. Next, he took out two pairs of chopsticks and fashioned nipple clamps out of them. Afterwards, he caned my nipples especially, though he did continue to cane the rest of me, too. Then he got an alcohol spray and did more fireplay with that. Still not finding a "limit" with me, the Dom went to his bag and got a stun gun. I don't know how high he had it set; I didn't ask. I only know that it wasn't on the lowest setting. He used that everywhere, too, including the most sensitive areas. With that, the Dom needed to go, because his date was waiting for him. But, it was a wonderful experience. Details about how I felt? Incredible! I loved the fire. It was a wonderful heat, all over my body. It wasn't quite pain. It stayed right on the edge of it. The stun gun was okay, but not my favorite. While the initial feeling of it was intense, it did not linger. The nipple clamps I hardly remember now, to be honest. But, I liked the caning the best. What a nice sting it has, and it does linger after the cane is gone. I even got to keep the cane as a souvenir, because, apparently, I got a little blood on it.

It sounds to me like a problem you may be having is that you both tend to be sub and there is no dom in the relationship. She is wanting you to be something you simply are not. I can not play the dom role, myself, leading my partner or telling him what to do. I need to be told/shown what to do.The fact that she wants you to 'know" what you want to do and to simply do it speaks to me of that, too. It is not reasonable to expect a person to "run before they walk". This woman may have been taught, herself, but she doesn't seem to be much of a teacher. I agree that you need to sit down together and have some serious conversation about what is or is not comfortable or known at this point.

I have recently joined fetlife and am wondering what else there might be out there of a similar nature. Any suggestions?

For restraints, you can find things that work well for next to nothing. any narrow fabric, like scarves, will work. You can use a large scarf or the tie from a robe under the mattress and attach scarves to that, to make restraints. It is normal, as has been said, to feel some apprehension about trying anything new. Enjoy!

Yeah, the guy I was working with kept saying "Are you sure this is your first time?" I definitely want more!

I had my first BDSM play session last night. It was awesome and intense!! It involved nipple clamps, fire play, caning and a stun gun. Wow. I want more! Does anyone else here want to share their experiences?

Thank you, Mikayla.

Yes, I am sure you are right, and I also know that discipline would be learnd over time. Still, I don't think I could do it 24/7. But, it might be fun to try!

As I get older and gain more experience, I find that things that didn't used to interest me appeal to me, too. I think it is all about pushing the envelope. Someone here has the signiture line "it's only kinky the first time." I think that expresses it well. Many of us love to explore our kinks. With time, though, what was kinky no longer seems to be, so we step out into new areas. Enjoy your new-found pleasure!

Awesome post, Sunday! Your lady friend is one lucky woman. I love prolonged play, too--just not a ton of teasing. And I understand well the areas you are talking about, from inner thighs, up over the hips, along the sides and over to the belly button. I love this kind of foreplay, both giving and receiving the pleasure of it. I most especially love the giving. I am told that my tongue has a life of its own and I LOVE making my partner moan and squirm with wanting more. I like to be made to squirm, too, just not for TOO long before I am given what I want. Have fun!

Hey, fellow newbie! I just joined and am really excited to have found this community! Welcome!

Hey, Tony! I just joined this site, myself, and I am so excited to have found it! I hope that, with time, your wife may warm up to the idea of satisfying your craving. But, if not, thank God for good toys, right?

Hey! I am brand new here and really looking forward to becoming an active part of this community. Welcome back!

Hey, Analfreak, I am new here, too, and so excited to have found this community! I have only recently gotten into the idea of anal sex with a man, with myself as the giver. I already know that I love being the receiver. One of my current lovers is a very young man not far from your own age who likes me to fuck his as with a strap on. This can be a really hot addition to lovemaking. There is much to explore! Have fun!

Thanks! I just finished devouring the thread on the BDSM lifestyle. I am so excited to learn more! I am a strong, confident woman who loves to submit herself to a man whom I can tust. And, yes, that is what it is about: submitting MYSELF; there is no force involved, is there? It is the choice of the sub to submit the the dom. I believe, with the right mate, this lifestyle could be incredibly rewarding. I want more!

What an AWESOME thread!! Thank you all so much! While I am a very strong person who knows my own mind, I also think I would love living the sub lifestyle, though possibly not in a complete, 24/7 fashion. I think, in part because I AM such a stong person, I enjoy feeling safe to give up the control to someone I love and trust. For me, there can be nothing deeper or more fulfilling. I so want to explore information on this subject more! Thank you all again!

My now ex and I ended up breaking or wearing out just about every piece of furniture in the house and we were only together a year and-a-half. Two beds, a couch and a metal futon. We both loved rough, hard sex. And, yes, I, too, love to be tied spread-eagle. I love what BDSM I have tried and am eager to try more. Oddly, unlike others here, I am not a fan of prolongued teasing. If I want it, I want it NOW!

I find that the limits are always just a bit beyond where I have gone. I do love to push the envelope. There are actually very few things I can imagine being unwilling to try, if all participants were happy with the arrangement. That is not to say that I would try ALL of them now, only that I can imagine getting there, in time.

"Back when the now ex-bf and I had a fight that ended with him holding a knife to my throat while we had sex, I thought that I must be a messed-up pup to have actually enjoyed it." Very interesting, MsLayD. My now ex was violent with me and, oddly, I, too, found it to be a turn-on. He didn't beat me, or anything like that. But, there was a time he held a knife on me and other times when he threatened to kill me. I was a both frightened and exhilerated by the power he had over me. I must be a major closet sub!

Ooooh, yes, hot wax, as someone mentioned. I love to be bitten hard, have my hair pulled, be held down forcibly and taken hard-- in fact, I love everything I've tried. I've never been flogged, but I think I would like that, too. I like to feel the force and power my lover has over me.

I love two fingers, curved slightly upwards, applying the kind of pressure you mentioned, right on my G-spot, while a guy plays with my clit with his mouth. There is no better orgasm in the world!

Thanks, don't mind if I do.

I LOVE rimming a guy. I love the way it makes him squirm and moan. There are few things hotter.

I am driving in the rain, remembering-- the night I stood, face upturned, and let its bliss wash over me; remembering-- how that cold wetness dripped from my hair, my face, falling on your hot skin beneath me. I am driving in the rain, remembering. The wipers' slap, slap, slap: a rhythm too familiar. My breath comes hard and ragged. In moments, you are here, inside me, then gone: a hot blade in my center, carving out its emptiness. My fingers ache with missing you, their tips are raw with your absence. My skin is bruised with longing, expectation of a promise unfulfilled.