Here's my recommendation in the following steps;
1. Get some really good porn. Contrary to belief, professionally produced porn is crap. Find the filthiest, amateur webcam, home made stuff (example are mature stuff, bbw, regular people making filthy home porn). Basically if it requires a professional crew to shoot, don't bother. Lots of free options to find those online.
2. Watch it together while engaging in light foreplay. Maybe just wandering hands, talking about what you're watching. More importantly, don't make jokes since most people like to use humor as a coping mechanism when watching porn with their partner.
3. Since you mention a HJ...well use lubrication AND if you're feeling adventurous....finger his ass and massage his prostate. If you're even more super adventurous, put a butt plug up his ass.
4. Witness mountain erupticus happen within minutes. Only problem is, he might really like it and want it all the time.......and it might be the only way he gets off lol.