Tyger

I gotta agree with Mikala here. I've never had a 3-some, but have known several couples that have participated, and all of those couples are divorced. Nor only that, but sleeping with your best friend WILL change the relationship, believe me, I did it (guy though), and our friendship has suffered. I know of 2 couples in open marriages, and they seem happy, but they don't have 3-somes, and are SUPER secure in their relationships with their spouses. In a 3-some, as you have found out, there can be an attraction beyond the 3-some encounter (someone new and different-how exciting!!), and that can cause the marriage to break up. Look at your exhusband's new wife. Do you want that happening again? Now, if you choose to do the girl/girl thing, technically, that is cheating. Would you want your husband to do the guy/guy thing, or even guy/girl thing? Because if you ask him to allow that, it opens the door for both those situations. Asking a man just to WATCH is almost an impossibility. Men are visual creatures as well as hands-on. He won't want to just lookie and no touchie. Fantasizing is a great way to get off, and if you want to masturbate to those fantasies, great!! But think about how you want to be in the relationship with your husband, and if you're willing to risk all of the mentioned scenarios. Good luck to you!!

You GO girlfriend!!!!!!

After being with my husband for almost 5 years total I have JUST gotten him to the point where sex toys don't fully scare him off. In fact, he knows I have them, but HE suggested that we use them one night!!! I'm the one that enjoys porn, and the toys, and I think that he is learning that they are an aid, not a replacement! That's how he felt, that sex toys were a replacement. Though he could take or leave porn since we're together. But I know he likes watching it. Men can be funny sometimes, huh?

When I was younger, single, (and thinner) I didn't care if I was being watched or not. It was a turn-on for me. I do like watching others as well.

I will run my fingers thru his hair, groan, moan, give a little direction, but mostly enjoy the ride!!!

When I was young, and didn't have any toys, I used the handle of a large soup spoon handle. That wasn't that great, but I was a bit niave' when it came to masturbation.

My husband has a great ass!! And he's got gorgeous blue eyes, plus, he is WELL endowed!!

I agree with WhiskeyWoman here, break it off until the DIVORCE is finalized, and you see the notarized copy of it. If he truly loves you and wants to be with you, he will respect that, understand it, and honor it. Married people need not get involved with other people until they are seperated (legally) at least. Where this guy has done all these things, DIVORCE is the good time mark there. Howard made good points too about alimony and morality issues as well. Plus, that guy would be better off if his legal issues were resolved after the divorce, though, if there is money involved, either way, she will be entitled to at least half of it, if it's not involving a will of some sort. Speaking from my experience, when going thru my divorce with my ex, I didn't start sleeping with anyone until we were legally seperated. Mind you, there were no kids, and no real property to speak of, so nobody else was involved, and I was seeing a long-time friend ( who turned out to be a Friend with Freaky Benifits) and knew the whole situation. My ex was sleeping with people the entire time of our marriage, so he didn't care either way. For me, it was the respect for my promise that I made, that held me back from doing anything, dishonoring myself for what I would do, not my ex. That said, I hope that you are able to find the right thing to do to make you happy and able to face yourself in the mirror. One thing to leave you with: would you fully trust this man if you 2 were to be a couple? Would you wonder whether or not he would cheat on you the way he was with his wife? Just a little food for thought there.

Sometimes I don't mind pleasuring my husband that way, but DAMN!! My arm gets tired!! LOL I mean really!! I will not swallow. I have, but I don't enjoy that, so I don't do it. And why, oh why, if you're jerking a man off, does it seem like he lasts longer than when you're having sex, and right on the edge....then....damn...he goes off before you!!?? I like it when DH masturbates me too. He just started liking using toys on me. He is one of those "If I please you enough, then you shouldn't need them" kinda men!!

No, it's not bad, unless you have an STD or some kind of kidney infection or something like that. Just be careful, cuz as mentioned, it can pass on STDs to your partner. Always get tested before going into a new relationship. As cheesy and over said as that is, it's worth it~TRUST ME!!!

Hon, I feeeeel for you!!! My ex husband was littler than I was use to (6 inches erect), but he really didn't do anything for me. He didn't know HOW to use the "Snail with the helmet"!! LOL To agree with Mikala, your hubby is lower than average in size, but like the old saying goes: "it's not he size of the boat, but the motion of the ocean"!! And I am sure that he is VERY aware that he is smaller than average. But, if you discuss other options, slowly, gently (a male's ego is a fragile thing). There are options out there for both of you to try. Penis extenders, clit stimulators, vibrators for solo or used together are very helpful and FUN!! And this site's SHOPPING area can give you some great ideas!! Look at the reviews and check it out. I'm not sure how old you are, but oral sex is NOT gross. Even animals do it!! It's a very pleasurable way to enjoy sex with your partner. It's natural, and most men (all that I have found in fact) LIKE the taste of a woman. Every female has a certian "odor" down there, that is natural. Unless you have some sort of infection, this odor is normal. If you feel very self conscious, shower first before intercourse, use some feminine cleansers. Maybe that will help your "genital self-esteem". If you're thinking of going elsewhere for sex, maybe you should re-evaluate your relationship. If your husband doesn't turn you on for some reason, then you need to figure out why. Is it him? Does HE disgust you? Do you not care for him anymore (as in IN LOVE with him?). Some people outgrow each other. If he doesn't disgust you, and you KNOW you're still in love with him, maybe a counselor (marriage) would be a good thing for you. Or, if you and your husband can "handle" it, trying an open-marriage. This can only be achieved by a VERY secure couple, and should not be entered into lightly. Self-esteem, trust, and most importantly, SAFE SEX needs to be addressed in situations such as that. And BOTH partners need to be agreeable to it. Have you EVER had an orgasm? If not, then you need to teach yourself how to do so. With a woman, we have our wires too complicated at times. We need to be aroused in the mind, not just the body. And that comes with relaxing, and learning what turns you on. I hope that this has been helpful in any way for you.

Yes I have, and there's one lady I would seriously consider it with. My husband would like a 3-some, but I woudn't want to do that, at least the first time. The first time I would want to do alone.

Yes, yes we do. Just as happily married men maturbate as well. It's a fact of life. Sometimes solo is what you want. Or they're just not there, or too tired.

Howard is very informed as a guy, most men just wanna see it and do it, so he is a breath of fresh air!! ~This is meant as a compliment, BTW. Thanks again for all of the info!!

There are also cock ring-dildo combos for her pleasure as well. There are also male masturbators, in different shapes and textures, for solo fun. Look under shopping, and then Toys For Men. My ex had a penis pump, since he was a little on the small size, and the one he had was a hand held one, and it did work, but only briefly. But he did get harder and a bit bigger right after using it.

I have found that this website, under Shopping, is one of the most complete I've ever found. Plus, their prices are very very reasonable!! Especially if you go to sex toy shops, those are very expensive!!

DANG girlfriend!!! You sure you don't work for this company??? You're reviews make me wanna buy!!! LOL Although, I must confess, my DH is rather "endowed" at 9", so that would make me, what?

This item was a freebie about 2 mos ago. It came in 2 colors, pink or purple, and thankfully, I randomlly got my fav color (purple), and all I had to do was pay S&H. I finally got around to using it about a week ago!! OMG!! I decided to have a litte solo fun, and this thing is awesome!! The 3 little nubs really do the trick!!! I have a really hard time letting go and having O's, so I was most happy with this little gadget!! I would definitely recommend this baby!!!! http://shop.tootimid.com/index.asp?PageAct...ROD&ProdID=4680

Mik, I think your reviews are very awesome!!! I purchase the Jessica's Strobing G-spt vibrator due to your review, and it is very cool!!

No, I don't think so. However, I do like my hair grabbed and pulled on during sex. Especially doggie style!

Well, for me, personally, I think that the first few toys, should be bought at a store, so you can look, handle and feel the toys. Some look really cool online, or in catalogs, but end up feeling gross, or too hard. Not what you expect. Good luck to you!!

Ditto to what Mikala & sexxikittie said!! Great advice!!

I have to disagree with the last poster, respectfully, of course. At least when it comes to the swallowing part. He needs to respect that you don't like that, and don't want to do it. In a loving relationship, there must be some give and take, but not at the cost of respect of one or both parties. Not saying that trying new things isn't fun, it is, but it sounds like you tried it, and just don't like it. Try something new once a week. Maybe go to a strip club with him, get a lap dance. Or switch over the "usual theme" of your lingerie. For example, if you like feminine and lacy, try leather and racey! Get a set of toys, one for you and one for him to use. Maybe a new video. My husband and I are in a rut too, and he use to not even want to entertain the thought of using toys, thought they were a "replacement", but he's found that he really likes them!! I hope that these suggestions help!!

I have a few porn DVDs/tapes. Although some of them are really stupid, and one has WAAAAAAAAY too much talking, overall, I enjoy porn. I think that a lot of women don't feel comfortable saying they like it cuz of the "stigma" of porn, sex toys and whatnot. For me, as long as it's all willing and legal, who cares what gets you off, so long as you don't hurt anyone by it.

My hubby is rather gifted in the size department, and, in my personal experience, I think any woman can take any size, as long as it's done easily the first few times. I mean, a woman's whole reproductive area is meant to STRETCH anyway! But, I have to agree with a lot of the women here, bigger is better!! My dh is great with that and his tongue, so it's all good!!