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DixieChick67

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Hi. I have been reading on Tootimid for a few months now and just today decided to get up the courage to start posting. The topics you cover on here are very helpful. I'm a physically disabled female due to a car accident at an early age in life. I'm 40. I have a long distance boyfriend who I started out with as friends many years ago. We see each other every few months and do engage in sex when we're together. When we're apart we do webcam sex or cyber sex. My dilemma is that with my limited ability to perform, I don't achieve orgasm like I want to. I do enjoy being with him and feel good, just don't cum like I think he wants or I want. I think part of me is deep down afraid of what he really thinks of me, kind of like I'm not a whole woman to him. Maybe I'm just being silly about things. When we're together he's very attentive to me, which does help, but still I have my doubts about myself. Is there anyone who might be facing this similar situation? I would like to hear from anyone with advice. Thank you.

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Welcome to the forum, Dixie! It seels that you are not allowing yourself to enjoy your bf to the fullest. I can't guess what he thinks but will say that he is with you for a reason. My gf was born with a curved spine that kept her in the hospital for most of her childhood. That IMO would depress and cause most people to just give up, but not her. She surprises me with what she is able to do or willing to try that most able-bodied people can't or won't do. Stop doubting yourself!!!!

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Not to take away from anything Howard said here. That half-glass of water can either be poured out or refilled. The choice is yours!

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Learning how to respond here, so bare with me. Thanks for all the welcomes. It helps to have a place to talk about what's going on. My BF has never complained about the pleasure I give him. He says the bj's are mind blowing (no pun intended) I just want to pleasure him in other ways to make things more spicy. I have full use of my arms and good upper body assets. He loves my breasts. Just need some creative ideas on how to pleasure my man more. The webcam sessions we have are usually pretty fantastic.

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Welcome to the forum! As a person with a really bad back, I hope you're able to get some really good ideas here!! We're real people here, not acrobats!! So, welcome, have fun, and looking forward to seeing your posts![/size]

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Hi Dixie,

I think that in the beginning you mentioned being afraid of how he views you. I can tell you this. If he cares about you at all, which he apparently does if he is concerned about the pleasure you are receiving, and not just his own gratification, then he wants you exactly as you are.

My fiance is missing her feet. She is extremely self concious of it but I have slowly made her realize that it does not bother me one bit. In truth, I actually admire what she has done and the confidence that she has in life. The fact that she doesn't let it get her down is extremely sexy to me. I love everything about her and wouldn't change one thing on her beautiful body.

Obviously this guy wanted to be with you in the first place or he wouldn't still be around. That means that he liked what you had to offer from square one. Don't let your fears and worries get the best of you. Simply sit back and enjoy loving him and him loving you.

Also, I know its hard sometimes, but something as simple as sitting down and talking about your fears with him can be very good for the relationship. Never forget that communication is key.

Hope something in there was helpful to you.

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Thanks to each of you for the vote of confidence. I know without a doubt the man cares for me or we wouldn't be doing this to this day. We've been in this R for almost 10 years now and it has grown tremendously. Even if the sex part stopped I know we would still have an amazing friendship. I just need to let my hair down so to speak and try different things with him. I know in my heart it's all about trust and I know I have to trust myself and know that he cares on a very deep level. :)

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Welcome DixieChick67! It's already been said, but the best advice I can give is to let him know about your concerns. Let him know that you want to please him. Communication is the key! If he doesn't know, then he can't help you! I hope everything goes well!

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