Members ladylove Posted March 10, 2009 Members Report Share Posted March 10, 2009 Preparing for Sexual ProblemsMany of us believe that if our sex life is good, our sex life is always going to be good, or that "serious" sexual problems don't begin until we're old and gray. The reality is that sexual problems can crop up at any age, and it's far better to be prepared than surprised.A recent survey found that most people — men and women alike — begin experiencing major changes in their sexual response around age 45. Nearly 75 percent of those surveyed felt a marked change in their libido around this age, and more than two-thirds reported that they also experienced a change in their sexual function.While this doesn't mean you should think of middle age as some sort of sexual death sentence, being realistic is important. You should be on the lookout for changes in your desire or interest in sex, or differences in your sexual response, such as decreased lubrication or erectile dysfunction. It's also good for your partner to be aware that these changes may occur, and that they can happen to almost everyone. Sexual obstacles like these are nothing to be ashamed of and are certainly not something to think you're too young to be experiencing.Communication is key — you should keep an open discussion with your partner about each other's sexual health. Preparing together for the changes ahead will bring you closer and help you to better cope if and when they do occur. Accepting that change is inevitable will arm you with an open mind and attitude — and that's what great sex is all about. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members ladylove Posted March 10, 2009 Author Members Report Share Posted March 10, 2009 Communication and TOYS, TOYS, TOYS. (you would think I actually get paid from TT, for this one ) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members leslieanne Posted March 11, 2009 Members Report Share Posted March 11, 2009 There are a multitude of factors that can contribute to changes in ones libido, sexual response, enjoyment of sex, etc. During our 40's it is common for medical issues (notice I didn't say problems) such as high blood pressure, diabetes, connective tissue disorders, arthritis, weight changes (most often increases), life stressors (work, relationships), depression, anxiety and for women perimenopause, that in and of themselves can affect everything related to your sex life. In addtion many of the medications used to treat these same medical issues can affect your sexual response. Also your assumptions and/or expectations regarding sex and the role it is "suppose" to have in your life as you get older is a major factor. If you think that sex should disappear from your relationship once you turn XX years old it will. So...... Awareness and communication - with your SO and your health care provider - are key!!!!If you have an medical issue that needs to get addressed do so, if given a new medication - find out how it might affect you, if you notice a change in your sexual response, go back and talk with your health care provider - there is always (almost always any way) another medication that can be tried. If stress, anxiety, depression are the issue seek appropriate help with a therapist. Be willing to question your own assumptions about what role sex is "suppose" to have in your life as you age and be willing to discuss it with your partner. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members marriageman Posted April 14, 2009 Members Report Share Posted April 14, 2009 I've found that being tired is a robber of sex drive to both of us. So we've started trying to have sex during the day instead of at the end of the day with whatever energy we have left. Vacations are good for the ole sex drive as well. Sleep late, do what you like, wear skimpy clothes, and have sex early and often. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members ladylove Posted April 14, 2009 Author Members Report Share Posted April 14, 2009 I've found that being tired is a robber of sex drive to both of us. So we've started trying to have sex during the day instead of at the end of the day with whatever energy we have left. Vacations are good for the ole sex drive as well. Sleep late, do what you like, wear skimpy clothes, and have sex early and often. I'v always advocated 'rejuvenation' weekends and vacations for couples. It does wonders Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members garry Posted April 15, 2009 Members Report Share Posted April 15, 2009 I'v always advocated 'rejuvenation' weekends and vacations for couples. It does wondersYou got that right Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members ladylove Posted April 15, 2009 Author Members Report Share Posted April 15, 2009 You got that right Thanks Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members sun_flower969 Posted April 15, 2009 Members Report Share Posted April 15, 2009 Sexual obstacles like these are nothing to be ashamed of and are certainly not something to think you're too young to be experiencing.Communication is key — you should keep an open discussion with your partner about each other's sexual health. Preparing together for the changes ahead will bring you closer and help you to better cope if and when they do occur. Accepting that change is inevitable will arm you with an open mind and attitude — and that's what great sex is all about.This is so true! ...but the sad truth is that a lot of couples just don't have the nerve to talk about these issues. Embarassment, hangups, bitterness etc... all can attribute to that. IMO it is ESSENTIAL to be able to talk about ANYTHING and everything with your partner! If you are timid about it you need to force yourself! So many marriages die from lack of communication. It just gets worse and worse and then it seems irreparable! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members attyathome Posted April 16, 2009 Members Report Share Posted April 16, 2009 This is so true! ...but the sad truth is that a lot of couples just don't have the nerve to talk about these issues. Embarassment, hangups, bitterness etc... all can attribute to that. IMO it is ESSENTIAL to be able to talk about ANYTHING and everything with your partner! If you are timid about it you need to force yourself! So many marriages die from lack of communication. It just gets worse and worse and then it seems irreparable!You are so right. Sometimes it seems like the most difficult thing in the world, but you have to make yourself get what's on your mind and in your heart out there in the open. When I'm struggling with something I need to talk about, I have to ask myself what's worse--the discomfort I might feel at having the conversation, or the damage that can be done from not having it? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members garry Posted April 17, 2009 Members Report Share Posted April 17, 2009 You are so right. Sometimes it seems like the most difficult thing in the world, but you have to make yourself get what's on your mind and in your heart out there in the open. When I'm struggling with something I need to talk about, I have to ask myself what's worse--the discomfort I might feel at having the conversation, or the damage that can be done from not having it?Women are soo smart . I'm working an being alot more open with my wife with everything. I just have a tendency to keep everything bottled up inside . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members ladylove Posted April 17, 2009 Author Members Report Share Posted April 17, 2009 Women are soo smart . I'm working an being alot more open with my wife with everything. I just have a tendency to keep everything bottled up inside .most men seem to keep things pent up inside. My husband thinks he's protecting me, but it only serves to close one out. Keep trying to make progress, every little bit makes an enormous difference. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members garry Posted April 17, 2009 Members Report Share Posted April 17, 2009 most men seem to keep things pent up inside. My husband thinks he's protecting me, but it only serves to close one out. Keep trying to make progress, every little bit makes an enormous difference.I sure will...thanx for the advice Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.