First Time Anal--probably Tmi

[attyathome]

Ok, so this is a little embarassing, but I'd like some insights from you folks with experience/expertise. We tried anal intercourse for the first time last night, after some discussion over the past few weeks and exploring with fingers and toys. We both loved it; I don't know why we waited so long. We're nearly 40 and been married 16 years; it was quite intimate and special to be experiencing something that was the first time for both of us. But here's the issue--after having 3 babies, I have a small hemorrhoid that is always very manageable. Doesn't flare up very often, and really only if I've been constipated, so I usually don't have a problem because I eat a pretty healthy high fiber diet and stay pretty regular. So I had a little discomfort from that during the sex, but not enough to detract from the pleasure of the experience. Today, the hemorrhoid is a little irritated. I know it will heal itself, and I'm not worried about it. But I'm wondering--is there no way to avoid that with anal sex? We used a ton of lube and took it really slowly. It's not like I'm in pain, but just a little bit irritated and I'm wondering for the future. Do most people with hemorrhoids just avoid anal sex, or should I just be prepared to have this problem and not do it very often?

[Mikayla1]

So great to hear that you had an overall positive experience with anal sex! So many people are stigmatized by it. It can be really intimate and very enjoyable. It sounds like you did everything right, used lots of lube, went slow, were on the same 'anal' page. Good for you.

OK, as to the HR - well, unfortunately, because of where they are located, it is virtually impossible to not experience some irritation during anal sex. Even with lots of lube (you can use more) and being slow, it will still be a semi-hard object (his penis) rubbing against it moreso than a bowel movement would.

My suggestion: use lots of lube, let yourself heal in between anal sex, and if it seems to get worse, go to your doctor. SOmetimes, they can remove them!

Continue on and have fun! Great question!

[attyathome]

Thanks! You are so right--it can be very intimate. I used to think anal sex and anal play would be gross, degrading, painful and was something only porn stars did. How wrong I was! It's been great to peruse these boards and see that perfectly normal people are getting anal sex and enjoying it, which helped me feel much less intimidated about indulging my curiosity. It has also been a great enhancement to our communication!

Anyway, I appreciate your advice about the 'rroid. An unfortunate but manageable situation.

[boff]

Interesting reading this.... I've tried it a few times and wasn't that impressed with it, until this past week OMG Guess you just need the right person. We didn't use any lube, I manged to make own during the process. I did not know that was even possible for that area!

[12GAUGE]

Interesting reading this.... I've tried it a few times and wasn't that impressed with it, until this past week OMG Guess you just need the right person. We didn't use any lube, I managed to make own during the process. I did not know that was even possible for that area!

I've found sometimes I need a fair amount of lube. Other times when I'm super turned on I have very little need for lube. Whats more is the more turned on I am the more likely I am to use my larger dildos mainly cuz I love that feeling of stretched out fullness.

[attyathome]

I hope I am not stealing your thread here but didn't see the need to post another. So, I have been thinking a lot about this subject and I admit when I was younger I always told myself I would never do such a thing as this and found it disgusting and you know, the normal thoughts. Well, then I met the love of my life and we have discussed doing this. He said its not a big deal to him but is something he would like to try with me but not something he has to have. Awww ain't he sweet? haha

We have "attempted" a couple of times, every time I have been quite intoxicated and have found it is the only time I get turned on enough to either ask or tell him to do it. It may not be a good idea to be drunk but I find its the only time I let loose so speak. Never works too well cause lube isn't involved and he just goes right for it.

Anyway, I have 2 main problems that come to mind and that would be pain and cleanliness. I don't mean to be gross or anything and ignorant but are these 2 issues something really to worry about especially the latter? I am interested in giving this part of me to him and of couse the curiosity myself just a little scared at the moment so trying to gather some facts.

Thanks.

I'd like to hear what others say, but here's my 2 cents: We've only done this a few times, so I am by no means an expert. On the pain issue, we have only ever done it when I am really super turned on and I really want to. I am able to just relax. We use a ton of lube, and I have never had any pain, really. Now, afterwards is a different story (see above, start of thread), and I do have a little paid and have to sort of recover after each time.

On the cleanliness issue, I'm really interested in what others say--I am sort of a clean freak, so it's very important to me. I am somewhat paranoid about any fecal matter making an appearance during sex. So, basically, every time we've done it I have to plan ahead--I try to make sure I've had a BM, and I also use an anal douche an hour or two before I think we're going to get started. I know a lot of people don't think this is necessary, but it makes me more comfortable.

[WhisperingURName]

Ok, so this is a little embarassing, but I'd like some insights from you folks with experience/expertise. We tried anal intercourse for the first time last night, after some discussion over the past few weeks and exploring with fingers and toys. We both loved it; I don't know why we waited so long. We're nearly 40 and been married 16 years;

We've been married for almost 20 and started anal 2 years ago. Both of us wished we had started sooner.

On the cleanliness of anal. I have learned to read my body. When there is fecal matter present, my body refuses to take anything anally. So often I try to accept toys or a penis, it just won't go. Then after plain boring sex I find I have to have a very small bowel movement. The body knows better. We just sometimes refuse to listen. Hope that helps

'roids, can't help ya there

[John Mock]

Regarding the hemorrhoids:

Sometimes a colorectal surgeon can perform a now pretty simple and fast procedure (with laser) to remove/greatly improve the issue--essentially cauterizing the blood vessel where the bulge is. You have 3 major blood vessels down there--so up to three possible hemorrhoids (plus inner or outer...).

If surgery is not really necessary--buy Calmoseptine Ointment. Your local pharmacy can order it if it is not in stock and get it in a day or two--and NO prescription is required. It is over the counter and works far better than other Preparations...

It is mainly calamine lotion plus a soothing menthol, etc.

As I have had past surgery to remove my colon (ulcerative colitis), create a J-pouch and reconnect everything so I function like a normal person--the surgeons recommend Calmoseptine Ointment for the hemorrhoids.

It is TOTALLY SAFE to put it on your finger after a bm and push it as far up your rectum as necessary. It greatly aids healing of hemorrhoids! Once they heal, you might only need to use a little bit of ointment once per day to keep things feeling good. It and any small amount of fecal matter that might get on your finger clean up easily with soap and water.

You can also use Aloe Vera gel (for variety if you want) on the more external areas--but I'm not sure that Aloe Vera would have as much benefit inside the rectum (it can burn a wee bit) as the Calmoseptine.

John

[Cinnamon]

I'm glad to hear your experience was pleasant.

My boyfriend and I have tried anal before once, only very briefly, since it was uncomfortable. I want to again eventually, but I'm now 4 weeks postpartum, and I noticed below my stitches, near my anus, there's a little swollen bit of flesh. First I thought it was simply part of the healing process, but now I'm worried it's a hemorrhoid. Will insurance pay to get this removed(medical/medicaid) or is it considered unimportant?

[12GAUGE]

We've been married for almost 20 and started anal 2 years ago. Both of us wished we had started sooner.

On the cleanliness of anal. I have learned to read my body. When there is fecal matter present, my body refuses to take anything anally. So often I try to accept toys or a penis, it just won't go. Then after plain boring sex I find I have to have a very small bowel movement. The body knows better. We just sometimes refuse to listen. Hope that helps

'roids, can't help ya there

I've been enjoying anal sex (receiving) for around 10 years. For me at least I find it so much more fullfilling than plain old masturbation (solo). My secret (not so secret??) fantasy is to find a loving woman who will fuck ME with a strapon and several of my favorite toyz. But for now it is a solo sport. Of course it takes me ALOT longer to hit my nut and hit the ceiling with my cum. My cums frequently last twice as long and I shoot farther and longer jets. It really just boils out of me and is VERY satisfying.

As for preparation before the deed. . .I light some incense. I take a long hot shower and give myself a thorough and cleansing enema. If it is winter time I turn up the heat cuz I like to be really warm when I am nekid. I do this often so I just leave the bottom rubber sheet on my bed all the time. I make a nice stiff screwdriver and settle down to it. I lay out my collection of bullets vibes and dongs and my favorite dirty mags. I like to be buzzed so yes I'll often have several drinks or knock back vodka shots and chase them with pop. I use this great 'male performance-enhancing lube' made by Durex that I get at Rite-Aid or K-Mart. It comes in a 1 oz tube. It has 7.5% Benzocaine in it. It is WAY BETTER than similar products available and much cheaper as well. I put a nice fat dollop on the end of a toy and hold it against my brownie. Some nice firm pressure and a bit of lube and that puppy slides in slicker than snot. From time to time I numb up my ass some more but not cuz it hurts I just enjoy the way it feels. Twixt the 'Longer' lube, the drinks and perhaps a bowl or 2 + the incense and music or porn movie I really set the stage. I've been a fair bit stressed out the last 6 months or so so my sessions are shorter, ranging 2 to 3 or 4 hours rather than the 6 to 10 hour sessions I used to enjoy a couple years ago. Mind you now I do not have a partner to play with either so I let my fantasies run rampant.

Sometimes I don't get quite as clean and it might take several more enemas and a couple more short showers before I am totally ready. Other times I dont need an enema at all and I am clean as a whistle in back. A few times I've even got sexually turned on while getting an enema so shower time takes a bit longer while I fuck in the shower. If after several enemas I still can't get sqeeky clean I usually hang it up and do something else for the day.

About the best part of excellent anal sex for me is I can really take my time. Mostly I don't even care if I have a woody going cuz the ass fun is wayyyyyyyyyy more intense!! Just to give you an example last year while using a brand spankin' new Duo Action vibe (made for the ladies)...this vibe has 2 solid inches of wrap around beads that twist and pulsate backwards and forwards all on their own while the head of the dong is doing something else...The bead action was absofuckinglutely amazing! ! ! In a fit of lustfull acrobatic sex I BROKE IT IN TWO. There is a weak point where the battery compartment meets the base of the shaft. It was here where I cracked the unit 2/3 of the way around. No amount of SuperGlue would put in the fix. I still use it cuz it has a very nicely shaped and fairly bulbous head. I got it with a 30% off coupon at my local sex shoppe. It was a $90 (regular price) toy I got for about $60. I plan to buy another one just as soon as my ship comes in.

Last night I finally wore out my last $3-4 bullet vibe so I gots to get over to the ole sex shoppe today for a recon and reacquire one. I will most assuredly check out their vibrators with beads and the price of my broken toy. Ya know I hadn't even had that puppy 3 months when it went kaput.

And finally last but not least. One of the finest reasons for engaging in long bouts of ass fucking is simply this. This morning when I got up (around 0600) my ass was tingling and buzzing merrily along. It still is feeling fine and it is 1008 as I write this. I gave it a nice wipe up with a very hot washcloth after I washed my face. Sometimes my butt will ooze out lube over the course of the day but thus far I do not believe that is the case this morning. I like a fair bit of friction when I am fucking and excess lube just doesn't get it for me like perhaps it does for some of you.

I feel great. Time to strap up and hit the trail for a bit of recon.

I AM OSCAR MIKE ON THE MSR.

12GAUGE OUT

[12GAUGE]

Ok, so this is a little embarassing, but I'd like some insights from you folks with experience/expertise. We tried anal intercourse for the first time last night, after some discussion over the past few weeks and exploring with fingers and toys. We both loved it; I don't know why we waited so long. We're nearly 40 and been married 16 years; it was quite intimate and special to be experiencing something that was the first time for both of us. But here's the issue--after having 3 babies, I have a small hemorrhoid that is always very manageable. Doesn't flare up very often, and really only if I've been constipated, so I usually don't have a problem because I eat a pretty healthy high fiber diet and stay pretty regular. So I had a little discomfort from that during the sex, but not enough to detract from the pleasure of the experience. Today, the hemorrhoid is a little irritated. I know it will heal itself, and I'm not worried about it. But I'm wondering--is there no way to avoid that with anal sex? We used a ton of lube and took it really slowly. It's not like I'm in pain, but just a little bit irritated and I'm wondering for the future. Do most people with hemorrhoids just avoid anal sex, or should I just be prepared to have this problem and not do it very often?

See my post here regarding that question. Probably number 12 or 13.

I am a guy so gas is natural and doesn't bother me all that much. And NO I am not some rude buffoon hillbilly going around farting up a storm.

I keep a bottle of Pepto Bizmol in my truck and the kitchen and extra in my storeroom. Plan ahead for all contingencies and accept the fact that some of us might have some discomfort afterwards and some of us won't.

I had a wonderfull evening last night of scintillating ass sex and my rosebud is singing and tingling and doing cartwheels. I shot 2 very nice strings of pearls last night and am very satiated today. The weather here is raining and ickky but I could care less. I am at DEF CON 1 AND CONFIDENCE IS HIGH.