Eyes Open, Shades Up

[hyokahey]

Many folks never open their eyes during sex; never even do it with the lights on. Why? Likely because to do so is too intensely intimate! Even when we look into each others eyes, we can keep our 'shades' down, not allowing our lover to look into us.

Do you keep your eyes open?

Do you have your 'shades' up?

When did you first do this?

Do you orgasm while looking into your lover's eyes?

DO you ever experience anything approaching the spiritual when you do this?

[ladylove]

I've had and experience all that you ask, with the exception of looking into my lovers eyes with the shades down. I can't and don't know how to close off like that during such an intensely intimate time. Nothing is done each and every time, it's all mixed up. I wasn't always able to look into my Husbands eyes, or have sex with the lights on etc..... that came with time and sexual self confidence which I didn't have right from the start of things.

[sass]

Do you keep your eyes open?

"Keep" them open - no. I do sometimes open my eyes but I don't keep them open any length of time.

Do you have your 'shades' up?

Honestly, VERY rarely are my shades up.

When did you first do this?

I have always kept the shades down and only very recently allowed them to sneak up a bit.

Do you orgasm while looking into your lover's eyes?

A couple of times

DO you ever experience anything approaching the spiritual when you do this?

No

[sun_flower969]

I've had and experience all that you ask, with the exception of looking into my lovers eyes with the shades down. I can't and don't know how to close off like that during such an intensely intimate time. Nothing is done each and every time, it's all mixed up. I wasn't always able to look into my Husbands eyes, or have sex with the lights on etc..... that came with time and sexual self confidence which I didn't have right from the start of things.

I agree with LL. I was deeply insecure and it took time for me to keep my eyes open because I was ashamed of my body. Now I open them and watch, very erotic! Sometimes, in particularly ecstatic moments I have to close them, but I open them again!

as far as looking in his eyes while orgasming... I have done that and it is intense, very intimate and bonding... spiritual... I am not so sure about that.

ETA: I have done it with the "lights" on from time to time and it was HAWT. he kind of bent me over the bed and breathed in my ear... "I am keeping the lights on, I want to see you..." Who was I to argue???

[mailahn97]

In the beginning I was in shock he wanted the lights on as I had HUGE self esteem issues. In fact the first night we were together I kept trying to hide under covers and not let him see me. Then in time and confidence building not only did I come out from under the covers I did not mind the lights being on. It was nice to see each other, but it took me time to get comfortable with this which was made easier by someone that I am very comfortable with.

Eyes open took time, but once I started doing that it was very intense to look into his eyes especially during orgasm. I would start to close them and then force them open. As far as the shades that isn't a big deal to me.

This all didn't happen for me til about 2 years ago.

[hyokahey]

As far as the shades that isn't a big deal to me.

To clarify, I mean 'emotional shades'. You can look into a person's eyes, but their emotional 'shades' can be down....though the shades up on the windows adds a naughty feel, don't they? 'Scuez me, I gotta go get my binoculars, shortstuff has her shades up!

[ilovebabyjada]

'Scuez me, I gotta go get my binoculars, shortstuff has her shades up!

lol. i about died laughing at that!!

I think it's very easy to keep emotional shaded down. I saw a "group" on facebook that is "I pretend to be happy because it's easier then explaining why i'm sad"

For me, I like to keep my shades up so my husband truly knows what i'm thinking & feeling. I do, however, put them down if it's something i don't like talking about (like how my daughter came to be... and if i'm thinking about what happened to be back then.. it's just hard to talk about)

during sex - shades up all the way. we know and can sense what the other wants and loves (hope i'm on the right track)

[sun_flower969]

...during sex - shades up all the way. we know and can sense what the other wants and loves (hope i'm on the right track)

Sounds like it sweetie!

[ilovebabyjada]

Sounds like it sweetie!

makes me feel so young. LOL!! i think i may be the youngest one on these forums.

[mailahn97]

To clarify, I mean 'emotional shades'. You can look into a person's eyes, but their emotional 'shades' can be down....though the shades up on the windows adds a naughty feel, don't they? 'Scuez me, I gotta go get my binoculars, shortstuff has her shades up!

I am thinking me multi tasking while answering was a bad thing...lol. I wasn't even thinking right. Hey bring your binoculars...not a problem. My emotional shades have been more up than down compared to my past when it was completely down in the past. Glad I gave some a laugh.

[elise]

Eyes open, when I can... I will look in my husband's eyes many times when we make love, and he into mine. It's part of our loving communication, and the "shades are all the way up". The visual stimulation of watching his face and body as he fucks me is a huge turn-on for me, and knowing he's getting the same visual thrill doubles the excitement. I always close my eyes as I feel myself building up to orgasm... it's reflexive, but also it helps me to concentrate on the exquisite pleasure of feeling and visualizing his powerful cock driving me to orgasm.

I love watching his face when he comes. His orgasms are so intense, though--when we first became lovers the intensity of his orgasms was almost frightening to me, and over the years if anything they've gotten stronger--his eyes roll back even if he tries to keep them open. And since the feel of his cock swelling and his body spasming when he comes nearly always makes me come too, and since I have never been able to keep my eyes open through an entire orgasm in my life, we always finish coming with our eyes closed, but our hearts open.

[ilovebabyjada]

Eyes open, when I can... I will look in my husband's eyes many times when we make love, and he into mine. It's part of our loving communication, and the "shades are all the way up". The visual stimulation of watching his face and body as he fucks me is a huge turn-on for me, and knowing he's getting the same visual thrill doubles the excitement. I always close my eyes as I feel myself building up to orgasm... it's reflexive, but also it helps me to concentrate on the exquisite pleasure of feeling and visualizing his powerful cock driving me to orgasm.

I love watching his face when he comes. His orgasms are so intense, though--when we first became lovers the intensity of his orgasms was almost frightening to me, and over the years if anything they've gotten stronger--his eyes roll back even if he tries to keep them open. And since the feel of his cock swelling and his body spasming when he comes nearly always makes me come too, and since I have never been able to keep my eyes open through an entire orgasm in my life, we always finish coming with our eyes closed, but our hearts open.

sounds intensely beautiful.

[hyokahey]

As love matures, the sex gets more...deeply satisfying.

[elise]

As love matures, the sex gets more...deeply satisfying.

I quite agree!

[Tyger]

Many folks never open their eyes during sex; never even do it with the lights on. Why? Likely because to do so is too intensely intimate! Even when we look into each others eyes, we can keep our 'shades' down, not allowing our lover to look into us.

Do you keep your eyes open?

Do you have your 'shades' up?

When did you first do this?

Do you orgasm while looking into your lover's eyes?

DO you ever experience anything approaching the spiritual when you do this?

Well, it's rarely the same each time. Yes, I have experienced/done all of that, and I've also experienced total darkness, and the feeling of "it's just a f*ck" too (non-spiritual, more animalistic).

[ginshreve]

I love to keep my eyes open while making love, but it is really hard - I need to block out visual distractions to focus on the inner orgasm... the times when I have made the effort to look into my man's eyes have been very erotic, not sure about spiritual... I think we are still building to that kind of connection and hope we will eventually be there.

[amberlin]

i never noticed until recently that i always kept my eyes closed. if i opened my eyes my bf would be staring at me, and it kinda made me uncomfortable, so i closed them again. im self-concious and i think he is looking at my flaws, even though he has told me that he just likes to look at me while were having sex. i guess i'm still just really shy, i need to work on opening up.