LilyElle

I'm truly sorry, I didn't realize that the way I phrased it made it sound like everyone who got pregnant of BC had done something wrong. I only meant to point out that, statistically, the majority of cases where pregnancy occurs while BC is being used are due to misuse. I never meant to imply in any way that it was foolproof. I'm very sorry if it came out that way; the only explanation I can give is that I am perhaps not the best at phrasing things. Thank you for so gently pointing that out instead of flaming me. In regards to the inactive pills containing iron, and to the loss of menses, my gyno told me that it was because Loestrin was designed, at least in part, for women who need to slow or stop their periods because of iron deficiencies caused or exacerbated by heavy menses. This may or may not be a misstatement, but that's the way she explained it to me. That's actually why I tried that particular BCP, because I was anemic from heavy monthly blood loss. In that sense, it has worked incredibly well for me. Yes, I only rarely get occasional spotting, and yes, it creeps me out a bit to not get periods, even after a few years. However, in my case the benefits outweigh the issues. If you want to keep getting normal periods, then this is probably not the right pill for you. Have you mentioned to your gyno that you don't want to eliminate your periods? Some BCPs are less likely to do it than others, and your gyno may be able to help you find the best one for you. I will warn you, though, you may have to "test drive" a few different pills before you find one you like.

Unfortunately almost exclusively in the shower. It's almost always the only time and place I can guarantee not being interrupted, at home or at school.

I've been taking Loestrin 24 Fe for 3 years now, and I love it. I've gotten none of the adverse side effects people talk about except for vaginal dryness, which a little lube takes care of. I almost never get a period, even on the no-hormone days when you're supposed to. That's great for me, because I have an iron deficiency from bleeding so heavily during my periods for years. Honestly, almost all of the people who get pregnant while using ANY BC get pregnant because they did something wrong. With pills, it's usually something like forgetting pills, taking them at erratic times, or not knowing that antibiotics means that you're less protected by your pills. However, as with ANY form of BC, even if you do everything right, there's always a slim chance that you could get pregnant. It's no more likely with Loestrin than it is with any other pill. Loestrin's got one huge thing going for it: it's one of the only BC pills on the market that uses real human estrogen. Almost every other pill uses either non-human estrogen or a close artificial analog. They work, but because they're not chemically identical to the estrogen your body makes, you're going to have issues with side effects. There are still side effects possible with Loestrin, but there aren't as many, and they aren't as common. Good luck! I hope your experience with it is as good as mine!

Good call, Ladylove. I'm sure he would never intentionally cause an "oops!" with birth control to force you to have another child, but when one partner wants a child and the other doesn't, Freudian slips can happen. Again, it wouldn't be intentional, but the subconscious is a powerful thing. By the way, Tyger, I just noticed that your "#of sex toys you own" is "THEY'RE TAKING OVER!!!" I died laughing!

I haven't personally tried it, but on another site I review toys for it's gotten mixed reviews, and most people either loved it or said it wasn't worth the effort. The general consensus was that the vibes are pretty weak, and it doesn't work for all body shapes, but if it works, it works GREAT. Yes, you can have sex while wearing it. This is in fact what it was designed for, though a few reviewers on the other site wore it around the house. I've been intrigued by this one for a while, and if it wasn't for that price tag I'd be sorely tempted...

Hm.... anywhere from literally 30 seconds to a few hours. Usually, though, it's more like 5 minutes, 15 tops. I've got quick multiples down to an art, because I'm never satisfied with just ONE anymore. My record is 3 hours. I wish I had time for those more often, but usually I'm so busy I need to just get off quickly to let off some steam. Also, with my bad back, arching my back for extended periods of time isn't the best idea...

This is a great poll. It was a real eye-opener for me, especially the first question. A few years ago, I would have had a hard time choosing just one thing I disliked most. Now? I had a hard time choosing one thing I actually disliked. No, none of it's perfect, but 3 years of my BF telling me how beautiful he thinks I am, treating me as such, and not letting me say otherwise, has made changes that border on the miraculous. I was really shocked at how much my self-esteem level has changed. (I used to think I had only 1 attractive feature: my hair. I'm a natural blond, with naturally straight hair that reaches past my waist.) This was definitely humbling: it reminded me how much I have to be grateful for in our relationship. He really is a treasure. For the record, I throw my vote with the "ripe and curvy is beautiful!" crowd! This curvy girl needs her steak.

Thanks Tyger! I'd wondered what that meant, thanks for educating us!

Welcome! These people are awesome, you're going to love it here!

Come on, give us another hint! What state is the 2nd person from? Pretty please?

spice

I'm a total pack rat. Anything that I might ever possibly need again gets saved. And once in a while, I actually need something I've saved, so it's like I've justified all the rest. My school stuff stays relatively decluttered, because I have to move in and out of the dorm every year, but home? Yikes. Every summer since I started college I've done big sort-and-pitch sessions, and there's still more to go... I keep all of my old school stuff, boxes and boxes of notes, any paperwork that passes through my hands, packaging from purchases in case I have to return them... I save a lot of sentimental stuff, then when it resurfaces I have no idea what it is, or why I kept it. I've thrown away so many "mementos" over the years. Some things will never go, though. Things from my great grandmothers... the roses my boyfriend had shipped from his grandmother's garden in Ecuador for our anniversary (nicely dried and sitting beside my computer where I always see them), that scrap of paper he scribbled his number on for me when we first started dating... the list goes on and on and on... Can I join the yard sale?

pie

TRUE! TPBM is making romantic plans.

I'll be honest, it grossed me out a bit at first to kiss him after he'd gone down on me. Don't get me wrong, I always passionately kissed him anyway (with tongue), but I had to suppress a shudder at the taste. I never asked him to clean his mouth out or anything. I figure if he's willing to kiss me immediately after I swallow (or spit, depending on how my gag reflex is kicking), the least I can do is kiss him after he performs oral on me. It took me about a year and a half to finally start getting over it. Now, I don't even think about it. It's not a taste I particularly like, but it doesn't gross me out like it used to, and the thought turns me on. Heck, a few more years and I may even develop a taste for myself! I don't know whether I'd lick off his fingers or not. He's never asked.

Great review! A little light-up penis bullet, that looks so cute.

Thanks for the warning, Tyger! I was all set to try this out, but I'm allergic to everything under the sun, and as such have to be very careful about what I put on my very picky skin. Given the issues I've had with other lubes, I guess I'll have to pass on this one.

I've got one usb vibe (hooray for TT freebies!) and everything else is battery-powered, so I don't really have any way to compare them. However, I've rarely seen a rechargeable that was waterproof, not just splashproof, and even more rarely under $100 (on my budget, not realistic), so I've never bothered to try one. I've got a pile of rechargeable batteries, so I can have the best of both worlds in a lot of ways.

We're behind you, Tyger! Pappy's got it right, he's being the selfish one. He should be glad he's got two wonderful daughters, and that you DID recover after your daughter's birth. I hate the assumption that women have to want to have children, or if they have one already, that they have to want more. I'm one of those women who just doesn't really want to have children, and ever since I made that known, everyone but a few of my best friends has either called me selfish or given me a knowing look and told me I'd change my mind when my friends started having babies. As if the decision of whether or not to have kids should be decided by peer pressure, like whether to buy a certain style of shoes! Tyger, you have every right to want to have only one child. That is NOT selfish! He is the one being selfish, trying to manipulate you into changing your mind on a decision this important. Making him wear a condom while you're on antibiotics is completely reasonable. Like Vanilla Bean said, stick to your guns, Tyger. Here's a little cheerleader: #<()># We're rooting for you! Don't back down!

Thanks Pappy! I too am printing off some of the tips...

In response to the original post, my BF is one of those lucky guys who, after years of practice, learned to have multiple non-ejaculatory orgasms. He actually hid this from me for a long time, thinking I'd find it strange, and only fessed up when I told him that I didn't think it was fair that I had so many more orgasms than him when we had sex. It was then that he told me that he actually averaged 4-6 orgasms every time we had sex, and had been hiding them by making sure I was too busy orgasming to notice. (I, inexperienced as I was, had no idea what to look for... so had never caught on. >.< Oh the shame...) He should be the one here posting this, not me, but I haven't been able to convince him to come join TT. He's read a few articles, but that's it...

The smile and eyes are what gets my attention, but I've got a thing for arms and hands... oh how I love strong arms and good hands. (ditto to ladylove, they MUST be clean) I've got a thing for musicians, and clever hands are a huge turn on for me. I'd take and post a pic of my favorite pair of arms and hands, but they're busy cuddling me.

Like AngelKisses, I can tell the story from the other side of the fence, where the grass is supposedly greener. I'm a 34DD (on bad days, 34DDD). I have severe back problems because of it. Now don't get me wrong, I love my boobs. Absolutely freaking love them. My boyfriend's the kind of guy with a lot of close girl friends, and he swears he's never known a woman who enjoys her own breasts as much as I do. When I don't think anyone can see me, I squeeze them, jiggle them, play with them... not sexually, but just because I love the way they feel. However, my back's gotten so bad I may have to take a semester off from school to get my back fixed, because I get spasms so bad I can barely walk. Even though everyone tells me the only permanent fix is reduction, I dig in my heels over it. Boobs can be a wonderful thing. But if you decide to augment, make sure you don't make them bigger than your body can handle. Also, just be careful of how big you make them in general. As some of the other ladies have mentioned, there are so many things you can't wear with big breasts. I have a hard time finding lingerie that I can physically get across my bosom. I have a hard time finding shirts and dresses that fit both my chest and the rest of my body, without looking skanky. And pretty bras for everyday wear? Forget it. I have only one that is pretty and provides enough support to get me through the day, and it cost more than a college budget can really afford ($60+). So think very carefully about this, before you make your decision! And remember that more is not always better! Good luck, whatever your decision! A quick edit to correct LadyLove, and to elaborate on what Toyqueen said: you often CAN nurse your children after reduction surgery, you just need to tell them that you want to be able to before you go under the knife. It is very possible to reduce breast size without damaging the mamary paraphernalia, it just requires a slightly different method, so they have to know ahead of time. If your surgeon tells you it can't be done, you need to get a second opinion, because unless you have some underlying medical condition or abnormality, there should be no reason why you shouldn't be able to nurse after breast reduction. Though Toyqueen is right, even if everything goes as planned, there may still be milk production reduction (say that five times fast! lol). You have to talk to a doctor, though, before making this decision.

Everyone's been giving you really good advice, which with my limited experience I can't top. The one thing I can help you with though is some of the communication. Saying "Talk!" or even "talk gently!" is all well and good, but it wasn't too long ago that I was the one wailing "How?! How do I do that?" I found one thing that is great for sounding your love out: dreams. For us, it worked best when we were just waking up in the morning. The night before I'd pick out something new I wanted to try, then when we woke up, I'd roll over and say something like "Baby, I just had the craziest dream..." If he seemed weirded out by it, we could laugh it off as a dream without him feeling like he had to go on the defensive (but still planted the seeds of the idea in his mind). If not, I could go into more and more detail about what happened in the "dream", sometimes as elaborate as "and then we did this, and I liked it, but I didn't like that so much, and when I did this you were screaming and grabbing the sheets..." You get the picture. Sometimes it led to very steamy wake-up sex, whether or not it involved the fantasy. SuzyP's got another great one, if you want to revisit something you've already done, the "I loved it when we ___" approach is good, too. Anything that doesn't put too much pressure on her to respond right away. If you pose it as "Want to try this now?" or "Would you like to do ___ tonight?", she may feel pressured, and instinctively respond with NO, in which case she may not be able to think about it without remembering she didn't want to, which feeds back on itself. (I didn't want to, so I must not like it, so I'll say I don't want to...) This isn't a cure-all, but it may help open the lines of communication. One thing you might try, if you haven't already: you mentioned she has a whole bunch of toys, and that she uses them, if infrequently to the best of your knowledge. Have you two ever considered using them together? You using them on her, or both of you using them on her during sex, or her using one on herself during sex? If she's open to the idea, it may help her ease back into the kinkier side of your relationship. Good luck to both of you! This won't be fast or easy, but with some work you can come through as a stronger, happier, more sexually satisfied couple!

I don't know very much about this subject, but I'll reply to the quiz for curiosity's sake... Am I addicted to pornography? This is a self-assessment quiz for determining whether you might be addicted to pornography. 1. Do you ever find yourself spending more time viewing pornography than you intended to? yes, but rarely 2. Are you spending less time with family and friends than you used to because of time with pornography?no 3. Do you usually masturbate while viewing pornography? yes 4. Has your job performance suffered as a result of porn use? nope 5. Has your use of pornography caused problems with your spouse or romantic partner? hahah, no... we sometimes even watch it together! 6. Do you sometimes prefer masturbation with pornography over sex with your spouse or significant other? hell no. There's no connection. Yes, I'm physically relieved, but I'm still left yearning for him, even if I'm to exhausted to move. 7. Do you ever wake up tired because of late-night use of pornography? no 8. Do you keep your porn use secret from others, sometimes lying to cover it up? only my parents; they'd be mortified. Everyone else who's ever asked, or been around when the subject came up, not only knows, but probably knows what my favorites are. 9. Do you sometimes fantasize about people you’ve seen in pornography while having real sex with a partner? Never, actually, which I'm told is odd. 10. Has your pornography use caused trouble with the law? Nope 11. Do you seek sexual images that are more graphic, hard-core or “forbidden” than you once did? Yes. I also engage in more "graphic, hard-core or "forbidden"" sexual acts than I once did. But I don't watch or do anything risky. I sense a pattern here. 12. Have you ever promised yourself that you would stop viewing pornography, then broken that resolution? nope. 13. Do you ever get upset at yourself for the time and resources you spend on pornography? no 14. Do you keep viewing porn even when you know you should really be going home or going to bed? on rare occasions 15. Have you lost the ability to find sufficient excitement in pornography and gone beyond that to seek others for sexual chat or illicit sexual encounters? nope 16. Do you feel guilty or ashamed after viewing pornography or other sexual activity? nah 17. Do you worry that your pornography use is getting out of control? no 18. Is it easier for you to reach climax masturbating to pornography than having sex with a partner? no. He can quite literally make me climax in 30 seconds if he puts his mind to it. I can't match that, even with my favorite toys and porn. 19. Have others said that you have a problem with pornography? nope 20. Do you find yourself looking forward to porn use as a “reward” or “escape” from the stresses of everyday life? Yes. I also look forward to novels, Photoshop, making jewelry, and online games as a "reward" or "escape" from the stresses of everyday life. Porn is only my reward of choice when my boyfriend's been teasing me over the phone, and I know it'll be a week till I see him. If you answered yes to 5 or more of the above, you may have a serious problem with pornography. If you answered yes to 10 or more of the above, you are probably addicted to porn. -------------------- I answered with at least a qualified yes to 6 of them. And yet I only occasionally watch porn. (we aren't counting the hours I spend "window shopping" for sex toys, right? XD) Those sources you posted made very interesting reading, Iha. Thanks for sharing them!