DADT

Hello S: I read your post. My heart goes out to you. You are very angry, hurt, and above all desperate for change. With good cause. Having said that, don't send the letter to your husband. He will not suddenly become enlightened and respond the way you want him to. Rather, it will become another example of how you have become an intolerable person to live with & make him withdraw further from you. And do yourself a favor and make sure that he doesn't find out that you vented to strangers on TT looking for answers. So what should you do? Well keep talking to people here. A lot of us know what you are facing. We can sympathize, empathize, perhaps give you something to think about. Here's something you might want to try. Go to Amazon.com, and pick a book by William F. Hadley, PhD. He has written some very good books about marital problems that get at the fundamental differences between men and woman and how to reconcile them to strengthen a couple's relationship. He isn't writing for the mildly dissatisfied. He is writing for people who feel like they are in a hopeless rut & loveless marriage. I've read his books "His Needs, Her Needs" and "Love Busters." Both explain clearly what it is that men and woman do to each other that weakens relationships, and he provides guidance on how to correct that. http://www.amazon.com/Willard-F.-Harley/e/...t_athr_dp_pel_1 Look, this is unfair, but as the woman you will often have to carry more than your fair share of the emotional burden. Many young men are not equipped to deal with complex emotional needs, their own or anyone else's. They just weren't taught to understand what women's needs were all about. Opening up and being vulnerable can be quite frightening to some men. Men are supposed to be strong. Men are supposed to be sure. Men are supposed to provide for their family. So each time you go to him with one of your concerns (justified as they may be) he hears "You aren't a real man." Sounds like BS? Read one of the books. You will see. Another thing to do is look for free help locally. Perhaps there is a local women's group that might provide a forum to air your feelings & discuss them with other women. Sometimes just knowing you are not the first person to encounter such problems relieves some of the cumulative despair that has built up within you. You loved each other once. You can love each other again. There are just things that you have to know and grow to accept about each other, before that feeling can live and breath again. Before I go I'm going to leave you with this song. It will allow you to have a really good, sobbing, heaving, cry. It will be an emotional release. Not as fun as an orgasm, but beneficial all the same. Good Luck, D

WTF, a guy goes on sabbatical for a while and everyone gets all pouty. Gals, when the BF/Hubby is administering oral relief does it drive you nuts if he makes eye contact & stops to tell you how good you taste & feel & what he's going do to you next? Or does that make you feel self-conscious?

You can say everything you need to by just walking off the dance floor the minute such a comments is made. No drama. Just a calm "I can't dance with you. You make me uncomfortable. I'm leaving." You've kept your dignity, and you've stopped the abuse right when it started. Works for dating too. If you "flip out" you give the guy the excuse to say "That bitch is a psycho." Don't give him the satisfaction. Plus you with absorb the upset which will leave a psychic scar. If you keep your cool and quietly extract yourself from the situation, he will be the one wondering "What just happened?" And you walk away with your pride & self-esteem intact, and most likely a strong sense of self-satisfaction that you didn't let a creep get to you. Make sense? Why do some guys do this? Probably learned it from their Dads or older brothers. And because they tend to find girls who will let them. So girls stop these guys in their tracks.

So can I infer from this that if you were a California resident that you would be first in line to offer to raise your taxes so that a first class child welfare system could be implemented? Child abuse is disgusting, but it seems not quite disgusting enough to overcome citizens' reluctance to pay for the services needed to protect children. Too bad we can't require people who will make unfit parents to use contraception. Sadly, that is un-Constitutional.

Have you ever met or spoken to anyone who receives AFDC or Section 8 housing (Welfare)? I have. The vast majority of these mothers are Caucasian woman under the age of 25 whose BFs left them when they got pregnant. So I'm going to ask you and others to be careful when you throw terms like "leeches" around. They hate being on welfare more than you hate paying for it. But they are usually very poorly educated, so cannot get jobs that provide benefits and allow them to pay for day care. We should really be exasperated at the fact that we haven't found a way to educate the underclass so that they can take care of themselves long term.

Free country. Salute as many or as few as you like. My point was that there are a fair number of folks among us who make unnoticed sacrifices for the benefit of the rest of us.

You have one. Try having him lick you until you feel like you are half way towards a "clitoral orgasm." You will be nice & lubricated. Then have him insert his index, hooking the tip of his finger towards the ceiling. Then he should brush the finger tip gently back and forth. His should be a patch that has a slightly spongy, rough texture. You should feel like little devils are dancing in your pussy. Worth further research don't you think?

I have a mountain of respect for anyone who volunteers to put themselves in harm's way. But can we spread the love a bit further? There are plenty of people to salute who give of themselves and to society who are non-military. So lets make a point of saluting: teachers; nurses; fire fighters; medical researchers; mental health professionals; social work professionals; people who volunteer to coach kids at sports or even how to read; foster parents; "Doctors Without Borders"; Green Peace; NSPCC; NSPCA; Bill Moyers. I look forward to the day when we figure out how to be part of the global community without dispensing Purple Hearts, observing solemn funerals at Arlington Cemetery, or overwhelming the capacity of VA Hospitals. When that day comes God will have truly Blessed America.

Philosophically your plan rocks. But I have a lot of technical & gender based issues. For one thing, why are you letting him go to work on his birthday? How much feedback do you want?

OK I just saw your pics on another thread. ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME? THE YOUNG MAN IS GOING TO DEVOUR YOU. I GUARANTEE IT.

Missy, he decided long ago that he likes your body. He wants to feel your skin so bad that he actually asked you to do this. You should have no worries about how you look or how your body will feel to him. Spend your time thinking about what you want him to do and what hot spots to focus on. Unless you just ran a 10K & haven't showered in days, he will love how you feel, smell, and taste. All that leaves is sound. If he is driving you crazy & teasing you mercilessly, you must absolutely, positively, leave no shadow of a doubt in his mind that he is making you feel fabulous. So give him lots of "Mmmm yes keep doing that" or "please stroke me there, it drive me nuts" or "kiss & bite me a bit harder right there." Be vocal for 3 reasons. First, he'll need the direction on what make you feel great. Second, nothing turns a man on more than positive, verbal feedback. Third, as athlete, you are probably quite assertive. Why not carry that into the bedroom? So don't be shy or embarrassed or self-conscious. He will feel like the luckiest man alive. Go ahead and give him a finale full of "OMG you're making me..........." and just scream whatever it is you scream when you reach that happy place. Have a great time.

Maybe not super close to orgasm, but perhaps on the right path. Do you know where your G-Spot is? Try inserting your index finger like a hook with the finger tip pointing up towards the "ceiling." Can you find a patch that has a slightly rough texture? If you rub that a bit how does it feel? Nice but a feeling of having to pee? Congratulations. Make sure you show Mr. Right when you meet him. Warning: these orgasms can be intense and rather sudden. So if you are a strong, physical girl, do give your partner the "heads up" that he may want to be on the look out for sudden, vigorous arm & leg movements. Best to avoid accidental concussions, at least on the 1st date.

Stop it. You are telling me you are going from "Hmmm shall I have minestrone or tomato soup for dinner" to "Help, I'm going to cum" in 30 secs. Rubbish.

Jeepers! Are you guys gerbils? Must have genitals built by Ferrari! My sneezes last longer than that. Does it hurt to cum that quickly?

I found TT randomly. I saw an ad in a magazine and my curiosity was peaked. Checked out the website. Saw the forums link and found a whole new universe. A lot of smart & interesting people having grown-up discussions about a subject very dear to me. That's what keeps me coming back.

And I thought all those massages were you being self-less. I feel so used. But for me that's a good thing. I was going to shave, but I think I'll skip it. OK I've braced myself. Pounce Away!

Missy: Every writer has felt that way. Its part of the "tortured existence" you signed up for. Read the fine print on the brochure again. It says quite clearly that you sit down at the keyboard and "open a vain." Darling M: please look the other way for a minute. No really, go look somewhere else. Missy: I know it would be wonderful if your "children" were praised and loved as much by others as they are by you. But to actually become a good writer, you have to submit to the process. That means every syllable, comma, and sentence structure is up for critical evaluation. And its not always going to sound nice. I promise you every writer has gone through this. Some for their whole career. But if you know you have to write then just keep writing. And next time the professor is mean just say to your self "I bet he has a tiny dick & couldn't get lucky if he fell into a barrel of tits." The have a glass of Pinot Gregio, say "fuck everyone," and write a masterpiece. Works every time. JUST DON'T GIVE UP. ITS JUST ONE TOUGH SEMESTER.

Only thing better is if she pulls that at breakfast. No time pressure.

Makes perfect sense. In fact, don't even bother touching me. All she has to do is tell me how she wants me to drink my own cum out of her pussy & why she digs that & I'm an instant Love Monkey. Oh alright, I guess it feels nice to have my buns squeezed while I'm getting a BJ.

Lilly, thank heavens. A question we can really sink our teeth into.....if you like that sort of thing. If I could, I would actually disconnect my ears, neck, and nipples from my nervous system during sex. I know women like those areas touched, stroked, licked, kissed....did I forget anything?......but those areas aren't "hot spots" on me. Does nothing for me. Sorry. You want to make me hard as a rock? Well talking to me about how hot you feel & how much you dig what you think I'm going to do to you gets the blood flowing. If she is looking me right in my eyes while stroking my cock and telling me all manner of naughty things I will give my "Undivided...." Then if she puts some fingers in her pussy so I can watch while she is still stroking my cock I will have lazer attention. If she pops those same fingers in my mouth every so often, I'll start to feel the electricity flow in my balls. Nice squeezes of the butt cheeks & nails gently applied to the back of the thighs can enhance the experience when done right. Just nice to be pampered. But really girls, if you show us what excites you, our brain, cock & balls will respond accordingly. At least for me. Have a nice day, Capt. Erogenous

Good thing she didn't come to us with a real problem. She needed help at Xmas

Where does all our curiosity & thirst for knowledge come from? When do you have your best thought about what we should discuss at TT?

How aroused are you when his tongue first makes contact? Is he spending lots of time stroking and caressing just about everywhere else before he touches your love button. If he is going in on a cold one then it is not surprising you aren't excited about being licked.

You need a license to have a dog, but anyone can have a kid if they want to. There are few things more disgusting that neglecting and/or abusing a child. And the frustrating thing is, becoming a ward of the State would be no bargain either. I can only imagine some of the terrible things you see. But that goodness someone is there for these kids.

I need to get a membership to the same Self-Help Library you belong to.