Tyger

I'm all for experimenting, and having fun. Some people go thru many many years without fully knowing what "orientation" they are. However, that wasn't the topic of your post. It was basically that your BF wants you to have sex with a woman to see if you like and it, and you're kinda curious, and also wondering WHY he would want you to do so....is that it? If so, and he claims that he doesn't want to participate (which, IMO, is BS! If he wants to watch, he will probably try really hard to participate), I guess you should really ask him WHY he wants you to do this. If you don't want to do it, then say NO. There's nothing wrong with that. Some people are perfectly happy with NOT trying to have sex with the same sex, and are fine with that. Now, if you are curious & want to, and he has given you the go-ahead to do so, then, there are a few things to keep in mind: Use protection. Yes, you can still get an STD with a woman-woman situation. It's not as "romantic", but it's better than bringing something home. If you don't want your BF to know the details, tell him so. Say you are willing to have sex with that girl, if she's willing, however, it will be in private, no shows, sorry. I didn't notice your age, however, if you and he are both young, I would highly suggest waiting to get married. I'm not trying to sound "holier than thou", however, younger people really have a hard time, since they're still growing up, figuring out who they are and what they want to be. It's very challenging and hard. You know this since you've been married before, though I'm not sure how long ago. You are right though, it's best to do these sorts of things before marriage if at all possible. Some people lead swinger's lives, and they are fine with it, though it takes a strong marriage to withstand that type of situation, or even 3-somes. Anyway, best wishes to you and I hope that you are able to get it all figured out.

Most porn has been geared towards the male poplution, since, that's the majority of the purchasers. This has been the "norm" for years. It's hard, but not impossible, to find porn that is a little less "hardcore" and a bit more erotic. I'm a woman, and I love porn. But, I have to be in the mood for it, I don't like violent ones, and I like the newer stuff (late 90's+). The older stuff just brings flashbacks of big hair (north AND south), liquid gold, and a profusion of makeup! LOL I reviewed one a while ago called Island Fever 4 which was really good. Not romantic, but not a WHAM-BAM-THANKS-A-FUCKING-LOT-MA'AM either. Check out the DVD. My review is on that, and in the DVD Review section (which the review in the forum is a bit longer, since we have a 2000 word max limit. Which is HARD, if you really really like something!!). Remember, when watching porn, you really should be IN THE MOOD for it, otherwise, if you're not, you either end up saying "whatever" or laughing. In a way, laughing is a good thing. It shows that your lover knows that porn sex isn't the same as Real Life sex.

How do you like your kink? Cute, submissive, aggressive, a little on the “freaky” side, threesomes, women on women, men with women? Well, anyway you want it this DVD from Adam & Eve Productions has it! There are 6 different “kinks”, plus 2 bonus scenes to choose from: Plush: a girl goes at it in a barn full of stuffed animals with 2 guys to help get her get stuffed too. At least one of the men had a French accent, which was pretty sexy. Sizzle: this one was one of my favs, Nicole Sheridan shows her kinky side with candles, hot wax, and even hot wax dildos with a buff and equally kinky guy to play along with her. Por Tarts: 2 girls go at it in a room full of balls, and popping balloons with themselves. Those girls have some MAD oral skills, lemme tell ya! They certainly had a ball, in more ways than one! Troubled Waters: a sub/dom scene in a bathroom. A beautiful Asian woman gets punished for being a bad girl by a hot young stud with some lashes, hot wax, and teasing. Great scene! Loved this one too Naughty Night Nurses: my other favorite. One is dressed in all black, and the other in white even has a gas mask on, to go with her vinyl nurse outfit. Medical equipment, douches, and stirrups are included in this scene as well. They both love the oral attention, and the use of vibrators, and both squirt! however, the white one is very aggressive in her desire to get off with the glass dildo. She is very, very enthusiastic in her masturbation! The last main scene was Stinky Sox, which I just fast forwarded thru, since feet and socks are just NOT my thing at all. The guy and girl do have sex with feet, sniffing sox, and loving toes. Again, not my thing. The 2 bonus scenes was Panty Drawer, which was just 2 women posing in a box, in bras, panties, nylons and heels. No action, just different shots. The other scene was from the movie The Dinner Party, and it was called “Dinner Party”, where the 2 women have a lot more than cooking going on! The only other thing that I didn’t care for was the whole spit-lube thing. I find nothing sexy about drooling on a person for lubricant. But, all in all, this video was creative, well done, and pretty good. I would recommend it for those that love to mix it up in the bedroom, and don’t mind a little Extreme Behavior!

Welcome and post when you can! We love fresh meat.....I mean fresh points of view!

Doc Johnson's Cherry Scented Lube works well, but it IS silicone based, and has fragrance to it. You may have allergies, or, you may be getting slightly ripped internally, when engaging in anal sex, causing anything else that may go up there to burn. Always remember to use plenty of lube BEFORE and during anal sex. Astroglide Shooters is for anal sex, with an applicator that is made to go up inside the anus a bit, for added lube. This stuff is S-L-I-C-K!!!! And it works!! Plus, it's Astroglide, so you know it's a well made product. Me and hubby LOVE this one the best for anal play. Let me also suggest something like a set of Anal Beads. They are small enough to stay inside, and easy enough to use and get your anus use to something going UP there. I haven't tried those particular ones, but, I've heard some good things about stringed anal beads. There are a bunch of different types, and if you just go to the Product Search box up at the right hand top corner of the window, type in ANAL BEADS, and a nice selection will pop up for your viewing pleasure! For my own solo usage, I tried the Polly Clit Diddler With Anal Beads, and the beads went in well, the toy strapped to me, and it wasn't uncomfortable. And, the beads stayed in!!

I know of several women that just LOVE that FULL feeling!! So, the bigger,the better (to a degree). I know that the John Holmes dong is HUGE, and, that would be a bit on the extreme side~for me. Though there is a poster on here that has used it, and really liked it. My biggest is The All American Realskin Vibrating Dong with a total length of 8" and a diameter of 1.5". I LOVE LOVE LOVE that toy!!!

I mirror Thurasis' sentiments. Jealousy is a state of mind, and it's one you really need to get over. Jealousy can be flattering, to a degree, however, it really can get on someone's nerves, and can kill a relationship. I mean, how many times must one defend themselves? Your profile doesn't say how old you are, but I have found that young people get really jealous. As we age, we come to realize that if someone is going to cheat, there's nothing you can do to change that. We also become more accepting that people look at the sex they're attracted too, whether they're in committed relationships or not. It's human nature. We look. That doesn't mean that when one looks, they're looking for something better. It doesn't. It just means that we're not dead! Don't punish him for being an alive male! It's not fair. Getting jealous over some people on TV is a bit extreme. Do you honestly think that Katie Holmes, Angelina Jolie, Pam Anderson, Emily Proctor, Sandra Bullock, or Tyra is going to pop out of the screen and take your man away from you? I mean, really. I'm not trying to sound insulting, but even in your post, you sounded like you knew how silly that really is. Jealousy, usually stems from low self-esteem. only YOU can work on that. There are many posts here that address self esteem issues and such. But, what I suggest to people, is that they concentrate on ONE good thing about themselves each and every day. Say you're having a good hair day. GREAT! Makeup came out exceptionally well today! AWESOME!! You're going "camando" to surprise your BF (that usually puts a sexy glint in the eye and a sway in the walk whether you notice it or not). WONDERFUL. You're wearing your favorite shoes! SEXY!! Morning sex! HUBBA HUBBA!!! Remember, your BF loves you enough to endure a whole year away from you, and came back to you afterwards! That takes love AND commitment.

Well, let me congratulate you on finding a toy that works for you. Sometimes it takes a long time to find something that works for your particular personal tastes, so awesome for you!!!! Him being "short" in length has nothing to do with his being able to help impregnate you. It's not like the longer the guy, the less the sperm have to swim. A man's penis can only go in to a woman's body so far. If he tries to go too deep (if he's long in length), it gets painful for a woman. Both people need to be fertile, the man producing enough healthy sperm to make it and fertilize the egg, and the woman's egg being healthy and the egg getting fertilized. Some people take a bit longer to get pregnant, so I wouldn't throw in the fertilization towel just yet. You're both young, and, I'm assuming, healthy, so just give that some time. You being as "tight as a virgin" may have a lot to do with him cumming too fast. I AM NOT BLAMING you there. Your finance' sounds like he needs to practice holding off on his own orgasm. It will take a lot of time for him to do, but it can be done. And, when he gets it down pat, he'll be able to go for a longer amount of time. I'm sure the men on here can give some tips on what he can do to stop himself from cumming. I know what my husband does, when he wants to prolong sex, is he will stop, and just do something to me, keeping me excited, yet withdrawing himself from me. Also, there should be nothing preventing him from keeping going after a short rest, or lots of oral action, to penetrate you again, and have sex with you to your completion. Usually, the second time takes a little longer to reach orgasm. It's not like he's got a orgasm limit of one per night. I will give KUDDOS to him though, for being willing to help you reach your orgasm before he's officially "done". Some men don't care about their partner's pleasure, and just roll over and go to sleep. Awesome for him (and you!!).

Got this off of MySpace. So answer it if the person above you and yourself were to have sex. I guess I'll be the first "victim". LOL 1. Would you be in control? 2. Would you pull my hair? 3. Would you whisper in my ear? 4. Would you talk dirty to me? 5. Would you kiss me with a little tongue or a lot of tongue? 6. Would you say my name? 7. Would you go down on me? 8. Would you let me give you a hickie? 9. How many rounds would we go? 10. What would you wanna do afterwards? 11. Would you take off all ur clothes then take mine off slowly? 12. Would you lick and bite me all over? 13. Would you like 2 play or get straight to the point? 14. Would you want me to take my time? 15. Would u fall asleep with me when we were done? 16. fast or slow? 17. Where would u wanna "do it" at? 18 Would u be loud or quiet? 19. Would you mind if i licked you? 20. Would you do it 2day? 21. Would you do it 2morrow? 22. Are you going to re-post these so I can answer them for you?

What SIZE batteries did you try? According the the shopping page, it requires 2 AA batteries. Brand of batteries shouldn't matter, since they go by SIZE and they're universal for more options for their batteries to fit.

I would highly recommend you go to your doctor and find out if there's something behind it too. Of course, deep breathing may help, and it's worth a shot, however, your doctor may prescribe something that will head off a migraine before they happen, or catch it before it gets too bad. I am in NO WAY a medical professional, however, sometimes, if I know that I'm going to probably get a headache (like going and working out in the humidity), I get a big glass of water, and bring that with me, AND I take some Excedrine to help head off the headaches I do get in humidity. But, again, that works for me, and in NO way am I telling you to do that as a medical professional. Good luck to you. Call your Dr.

Each woman is different (as with men). So, what one woman may love and that gets her hot, another may find extremely annoying. Like Howard suggested, I would ask her. If she doesn't know, then it can be a fun adventure. Just make sure that she knows that you're trying, and you want to please her and turn her on, and not annoy her. Some suggestions (from an easily annoyed woman): sincere compliments, neck/shoulder rubs, caresses (not gropes. I find groping disresectful), flowers, a handwritten note, text messages, surprise dinners, helping out with housework, just taking the time to spend with me, a nice long drive in the country. Some of those are a bit cliche', but they work.

Great article. Very informative!

I HATE the old "it'll work itself out" pep talk. Things rarely ever just work themselves out without some sort of intervention. I'm sorry that your friends did that. But, it's just recently that people are a bit more open about talking about something that is completely natural~SEX! I have to agree, you can't stop talking about it. Though, timing is very important. Not when you're horny and frustrated, and also away from the bedroom. You both need to see a marriage counselor. One that specializes with sexual issues. Just because he's 33 doesn't mean that he shouldn't have desires. He may not be as intensly horny as many young people are, but he shouldn't be flatlined in it either. If he is stressed about work/school, then he needs to also learn how to balance all of that out, as well as his marriage to you, which, of course, includes both of your sexual needs and desires. Easier said than done, I know, but a counselor will help point that out to him. Marrying your best friend is very important. It helps the marriage stick together better. Plus, you feel comfortable talking to them about anything. However, it can also make one partner give a bit less effort in the relationship, because they feel so secure and comfortable. This means the death of many marriages. In a marriage, effort must be made on both sides. Keep it interesting, truthful, and, when possible, fun. This includes sex. Sex is adult play. If you're in a committed relationship, it's between 2 loving people that care about each other and their feelings too. It should never ever be a chore! Laughing and loving are important, and it seems as though your husband has lost that knowledge.

I have to agree with Howard, your BF needs to grow up & also get a bit more educated. Yes, *down there* is where you pee and poop, however, it's also the center for pleasure! Using your mouth and tongue is a similar feeling to having actual intercourse with a bit more stimulation (tongue action). When he cums, or even "leaks" a bit, there is NO urine in it. It's just pre-cum/cum that comes out of the penis when he's aroused/getting off. There is a small valve that blocks the flow of urine when a man is aroused. Hence why a man has one heck of a time peeing with a hard on. So, if he's worried about leaking urine in your mouth, then he should stop. Plus, he should (and so should you) read about each other's genitals. Educate yourself as to what does what, and where it is. Also read up on the G-spot orgasm. Those happen often by "accident" at first, and can make a woman literally squirt out fluid. Many women (and men too) wonder if the woman urinated, but they didn't. This may freak out your already shy boyfriend a bit, but it's totally normal and natural. I can understand the desire to be clean before any oral action happens, and that is a good thing. Though, the occassional surprise blow job isn't a bad thing either. If you're a clean & healthy person, then there shouldn't be any concerns as to the cleanliness of his or your genitals. But, I too also prefer to be clean and freshly shaved before any action happens. It sounds like he's just a bit immature and still thinks that "that is GROSS", but it's not at all. It's totally normal and natural to do, and don't forget that it feels AWESOME!!! There are, of course, the rare few men that actually DON'T like oral sex to be performed on them, for some reason. I'm not sure that this is the case. Your BF may just need some time to find out how his body works, and how the female body works, for him to get over his "icky"-ness. I remember when I started giving BJs. I'd had sex ed, knew how things worked down there, but still, the thought of that was kinda weird to me, so when I gave my BF head, I'd have some toothpaste handy, just so he wouldn't taste it in my mouth after (and me too). I grew out of that once I realized that most men find that taste arousing and exciting. So, there is hope for your BF. Until then, encourage him to learn a bit about more about physiology, and keep reassuring him that it's OK, and you WANT to do it.

I love having my scalp massaged ANY TIME!! LOL Again, I need to be in the mood. And, heaven help hubby if he gets one of those ubber sensitive hairs!!!!!

If you had such a huge tear, I would definitely abstain until you get the advise from your OB/GYN. Trust me, they KNOW that anal sex happens, and I am sure that they'd rather you ask them questions than risk injuring yourself even further, when it was fully avoidable. Your GYN has heard & seen it all, so please please please don't be shy asking THAT doctor questions!! After all (s)he has seen you inside & out!!

Very cool!!!

MM, I am ashamed of you!!! You don't know the name of it when a woman is facing the other way, on top????? Reverse Cowgirl!!! *smack smack*!!

Wow! Well, I can understand the desire NOT to have kids until you're SURE you're ready. Most forms of BC are 99% effective if used properly. And, since you're in a committed relationship, those issues of IF the BC form fails must be addressed BEFORE hand. Nowadays there really isn't an awful lot of good excuses to get pregnant if you're using BC correctly, IMO. Now that the roles are reversed, you can sympathize with your husband. Does this make it right? No. He is making his internet GAMES more important then spending time with you. That's what it boils down too. People will NOT die if he misses a game or 2. Or if he drops out all together. I get it that role playing games, or other internet games (my mother use to play a lot of internet Bridge) can be important to some people that are lonely, but, in NO WAY should it take time away from a couple on a regular basis, when the one gaming claims that they just don't have time to spend with their SO's or are "too tired". You really need to have a serious talk with your husband. You may even need to either give him an ultimatum or at the very least, having him cut back on his gaming time online. It's not fair that he's escaping like that on a regular basis. People escape for different reasons. You really need to find out why he feels the need to escape to the Internet on such a regular basis. He is taking you for granted, and he needs to become more aware of it. Best wishes and good luck to you.

I have to agree with Thurasis. Pain is your body's way of saying STOP WHAT YOU'RE DOING CUZ YOU'RE GONNA HURT SOMETHING!!!! What many people should understand, is that, in anal sex, there is a difference between discomfort and pain. Of course it's going to be a bit uncomfortable the first few times you try anal sex. I suggest starting small, like a finger, or small toy, and LOTSA LOTSA LOTSA lubrication. Just putting lube on then trying to cram a penis up there, is, well, not a great idea. It takes time and a conscious effort to relax those muscles that are designed to PUSH stuff OUT, not allow it UP in there. Slow and easy. Some people truly enjoy anal sex. Once you've tried it a few times, and get use to the idea of something going UP there, well, that's really when you can tell if you're going to like it or not. Of course, like everything else, it's not for everyone. But, how else are you gonna know if you like something if you don't give it a fair shot?

I have to be in the mood for it, and it has to be ALL of my hair. I am what hair stylists call "Tender-headed", which, as the name implies, my scalp is very sensitive. But, I do have to be in the mood. When I am WHOA BABY!!! Look out!!!

WOW! That's a lot of info!! And a lot of stuff for one person to deal with. First, you have to know that, unless she's willing to love herself, and believe in herself, there's not much you can really do to aleviate her low self-esteem. All the other responders have pointed out some possibilites and some ways to help, so I won't repeat those. However, I will repeat that you may want to think about the relationship you're in. I'm not saying it's doomed to fail, because, if there is true love there, then, of course, it's possible to overcome. But, it will take A LOT, and I do mean A LOT of work. This woman is what I would call high maintainance. Some people think that that phrase means that a woman needs pampering, money, manicures, and salons. But, to me, it also may mean that there are a lot of emotional needs that are at an extremely high level. My ex was high maintainance. Trust me, it was draining. Constantly having to affirm that he was a good lover, I loved ONLY him, I thought he was sexy, blah blah blah. It was a one-way street. I rarely got any kind of positive feedback or compliments from him, unless I asked directly. It really was tiring, and hard on our relationship. She sounds like a very one-sided person, who just wants someone to go with whatever she wants, and doesn't really concern herself on what her partner wants or needs. That in itself would make me walk out the door. I mean, is she an adult that wants a relationship, or is she a small child that needs to be taught and taken care of? In an adult relationship, it's a 2 way street. THere is a fair amount of giving and taking. A great lover is learned, not born! A great lover has, not only a willingness to please, but to teach their lover how to please them as well. Where is that in your relationship? Best wishes to the both of you.

Yes, my husband knows that I am on here. At first he was apalled that I admitted to what we tried in the bedroom. But, like I told him, only a few of my friends actually had the nerve to come on here, and only a couple of them have even met him, so, it's not like the whole world knows who I am, and who he is. LMAO

I saw kind of a twist here. First you say that you've been screwing your husband since '72, so you know what you're doing, but yet, when he wants to show you what he likes, it sounds like you brush him off, since you know what you're doing. Then you get pissed off when he doesn't listen to you? Do you see the cycle here? Remember, owning genitals doesn't automatically make anyone a great lover. The desire to please, and the willingness to teach how to be please (good listening skills & a willingness to teach) are keys here. I'm not trying to sound insulting here, so please don't take it that way. Sex is adult playtime. It's suppose to be fun. Even long-time couples can learn new things, or a different way to touch and be touched. Maybe he discovered something he liked one night either with you, or solo, and wants to repeat it. So, why not ask him to describe exactly what he wants you to do? What's the harm in that? You should always be willing to learn new ways to please your lover. Getting frustrated with him isn't helping, which, of course, you know. Calm down, listen and learn. Maybe it's taken him this long to finally figure out that he needs to say something to you if he wants the desired results. Same goes for him. If he won't LISTEN to what you're saying, then SHOW him. Who says you can't stop him from doing what you're not liking and showing him what you DO like?? Nothing. Granted, 35 years is a bit long to learn something, but, maybe you just need to sit him down and tell him that you're willing to try new things, and learn something new that he likes, but he has to be willing to do the same. Nobody can read minds. And, if things that have worked in the past, aren't really what one wants, the best thing to do is not fake it, or just settle for what's going on. Stand up (or, I guess in the case of the bedroom: lay down) the law, how you want it, and ask how your lover wants it too.