Members Amylynn920 Posted March 27, 2008 Members Report Share Posted March 27, 2008 Hubby asked me a simple question the other day that I couldn't answer, so maybe others here can. He asked me "Why a woman in a relationship with a willing man would need or want to use a dildo when she has a live penis available." And honestly, I didn't have an answer. So I guess the question is, why if you have a real penis available would you use a dildo. Good question I think and am interested to hear answers. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Jaca Posted March 27, 2008 Members Report Share Posted March 27, 2008 My DH likes to watch me using it on myself. We have no interest in 3+somes so I guess using a dildo is an opportunity for him to see me getting satisfaction from another perspective.He learns from it, too - angle, pressure etc. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members jesso Posted March 27, 2008 Members Report Share Posted March 27, 2008 For my guy, it has to do with him seeing me play with myself. Insertion from a different perspective. We've also used it for foreplay and teasing. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Amylynn920 Posted March 27, 2008 Author Members Report Share Posted March 27, 2008 Thanks everyone, it's not that he's uncomfortable if I wanted to use it, he just wanted to know why a woman would prefer what he says, "fucking a plastic stick" versus picking a man's penis, if BOTH were available. I don't use dildo's because it's my preference not to, so I could not answer the question. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Mr.SP Posted March 27, 2008 Members Report Share Posted March 27, 2008 So I guess the question is, why if you have a real penis available would you use a dildo.My most simple answer is "Because you can".From a guys perspective:Why do we masturbate when we are in a sexually active relationship? Because we can.I know for a fact a dildo will stay erect longer than I ever could. (lucky dildo's)On top of that I love to watch LG masturbate. I take mental notes on what she is doing so I can try to do it to her at another point in time and see if I can get her to make the same facial expressions. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tyger Posted March 27, 2008 Report Share Posted March 27, 2008 I LOVE Mr. SP's response "because you can". That's pretty much it.I think that the KEY word here is CHOICE. I don't know of any woman that would give up making love with their SO so they could use a dildo/vibrator. Any sort of sex toys are made to ENHANCE, NOT replace human sexual contact. Like Mr.SP said, why do men masturbate even if they're in great relationships....cuz they can!! That's EXACTLY it!I have lots of dildos, and many men love to have a visual when their woman is being aroused, whether it's their mouth, fingers, or dildos. It's all about the enhancing! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members chloegirl Posted March 27, 2008 Members Report Share Posted March 27, 2008 It's not that you're replacing him with plastic.....no toy can take the place of real physical, skin on skin contact (not to mention the human, emotional aspect)....but.....there's no doubt that just like any type of masturbation it is a different kind of stimulation that feels good as hell. Whether you let him use it on you or you let him watch you, it is definitely hot, which can rev your play together up a notch.Besides that, no matter how good your man is, he may not always be around or in the mood when you are, so why not indulge in a little private play? You can never have too many "O's", and what man wouldn't appreciate you being in a really good mood all the time?! Of course maybe being in relatively new relationships may make them more resistant at first, but if you slowly introduce a shy guy into this and make him realize there is no threat or insult to his masculinity I guanantee he will not be repulsed! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tyger Posted March 27, 2008 Report Share Posted March 27, 2008 Maybe a woman just wants one kind of dick that doesn't have another kind of dick on the the other end?OMG!! LMAO!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Wheezer Posted March 27, 2008 Members Report Share Posted March 27, 2008 Maybe a woman just wants one kind of dick that doesn't have another kind of dick on the the other end?LMOA, what a great saying!!I love the view and learn from it. I also like the confidence and trust it takes for her to do that in front of me. And it's not like my hand is idle while I'm licking, watching, learning, and loving! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Amylynn920 Posted March 28, 2008 Author Members Report Share Posted March 28, 2008 It's not that you're replacing him with plastic.....no toy can take the place of real physical, skin on skin contact (not to mention the human, emotional aspect)....but.....there's no doubt that just like any type of masturbation it is a different kind of stimulation that feels good as hell. Whether you let him use it on you or you let him watch you, it is definitely hot, which can rev your play together up a notch.Besides that, no matter how good your man is, he may not always be around or in the mood when you are, so why not indulge in a little private play? You can never have too many "O's", and what man wouldn't appreciate you being in a really good mood all the time?! Of course maybe being in relatively new relationships may make them more resistant at first, but if you slowly introduce a shy guy into this and make him realize there is no threat or insult to his masculinity I guanantee he will not be repulsed! This is basically the answer I gave, because it's fun and they feel good, but I think he just didn't understand what an artificial penis had to offer vs the choice of a real penis and I couldn't fully explain it. The feeling is different, not necessarily better, just different, but I really think his thoughts were why would a woman choose a toy over a real penis and I think the best answer was because it's different. I just couldn't answer it the way all of you did, so thanks it helped. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members synirr Posted March 28, 2008 Members Report Share Posted March 28, 2008 Real penises don't vibrate. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members pappyld04 Posted March 28, 2008 Members Report Share Posted March 28, 2008 Mr. SP, tango and iha I think have given you the answer here. IHA, as I said you definitely have the words. I love that answer. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tyger Posted March 28, 2008 Report Share Posted March 28, 2008 Real penises don't vibrate.Well, maybe if there's an electrical outlet around......and him not being totally aware......no, no, bad idea........a bullet up his ass? No, not unless he's into that sort of thing......vibrating bed? That sounds safer.....LOL Ok, I'm done being evil (for now).... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Amylynn920 Posted March 29, 2008 Author Members Report Share Posted March 29, 2008 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Review Team TonboMidori Posted March 29, 2008 Review Team Report Share Posted March 29, 2008 My SO and I had that discussion, and here are some of the reasons I put forth. These are not slams, these reasons can (and do) apply to vaginas too!- Real penis is not always available- Real penis is not alway cooperative- Sometimes you just want to get off all on your own (like when you and SO have had a fight and make-up sex hasn't occurred yet )- Dildos can come in fun colors/shapes that just do NOT occur in a healthy human penis (if a guy's actual penis had long soft tendrils and was bright orange, I might assume the guy was an alien sent to mate with human women. And I don't have an alien fetish, so that would be a no go) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tyger Posted March 30, 2008 Report Share Posted March 30, 2008 - Dildos can come in fun colors/shapes that just do NOT occur in a healthy human penis (if a guy's actual penis had long soft tendrils and was bright orange, I might assume the guy was an alien sent to mate with human women. And I don't have an alien fetish, so that would be a no go).....or there may be one helluva infection!! LOL Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Mikayla1 Posted March 30, 2008 Members Report Share Posted March 30, 2008 I love the answers in this post! Iha, tooooooo funny!The misconception about dildos and vibrators are that 'if we were satisfied by our men, we wouldn't NEED the dildo.' The truth is, most women do not NEED the dildo, the vibrator, the bullet or any other sex toy. In fact, we don't NEED a penis either. We WANT these things. When we have sex with our men, enjoying ourselves, feeling connected, loved, accepted. That is something no dildo can give us. That personal touch, the affection of another, the live compatibility of another soul. That is the thing that women need and WANT.Sex toys are enhancements, not replacements. They are good for those quickie masturbation sessions when we just need to get off (come on guys, you can relate, you all do it too). Bullets are great for sex enhancement (why use a finger to stimulate your clit when you can have countless more Os with a bullet???), and a dildo or vibrator can be a great visual for our partner. Men are visual creatures, so watching us get off with another penis is usually a big turn on.I think for most women the answer is a combination of those already given. It is the same for me...because I can and I have the option. Would I ever choose to have an inanimate object instead of the warm one attached to my hubby? Maybe for a quick session, but never long term. I prefer the benefits that go along with my hubby's dick and that is why I prefer him. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Jackie102 Posted April 9, 2008 Members Report Share Posted April 9, 2008 Maybe a woman just wants one kind of dick that doesn't have another kind of dick on the the other end?That's funny! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members katiegirl Posted April 13, 2008 Members Report Share Posted April 13, 2008 Because the real penis is not always available. And it's just added fun for BOTH(or 3 in my case) involved in the relationship. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members ladylove Posted April 16, 2008 Members Report Share Posted April 16, 2008 It adds to foreplay, and if your SO can't be home evey night it' a good playmate Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Review Team bgechloe Posted May 14, 2008 Review Team Report Share Posted May 14, 2008 In my case it depends on the situation. Now if we are together he like most other men really like to watch a woman get off on their own. So after I got married it took a bit to get comfortable to do this cause I knew he was staring at me the whole time. Then theres the times where he works at night so what if he is not home and you just ffel that urge to get off, well my toy has never let me down (cept when the batteries died). or in another one of my situations I am the kind of girl who watches porn just cause well I like it, not always to get off mind you. However there are those times where I get turned on and instead of waking up my man who has had a night at work and had told me he is tired I do it myself. We have talked about it and like tonight I got my new 'wireless bunny teaser' I got from this site and he was too tired to try it out so he told me to let him know in the morning hwo it went and he'd play with me the following day. So he knows I am not trading him in and I feel it allows both people to explore new boundries without having to go outside the home I dont ever feel that it will be the same feeling but its a new experience and that keeps life interesting.FYI omg this teaser is awesome I dont knwo how I am going to handle it. It is VERY powerfull. Heck I paid more for my dildo and it dont come close to that much vibration. Made a joke to my man that if a dildo could vibrate liek that I might have to consider trading him in lol (I am glad we are not serious ppl when it comes to joking about things like that) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members cmwise1 Posted May 14, 2008 Members Report Share Posted May 14, 2008 Tell him to detach his penis, leave it at home. You'll test them both winner stays, dog gets the loser...Simple :lol: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members 12GAUGE Posted November 30, 2008 Members Report Share Posted November 30, 2008 My most simple answer is "Because you can".From a guys perspective:Why do we masturbate when we are in a sexually active relationship? Because we can.I know for a fact a dildo will stay erect longer than I ever could. (lucky dildo's)On top of that I love to watch LG masturbate. I take mental notes on what she is doing so I can try to do it to her at another point in time and see if I can get her to make the same facial expressions.Mr SP is a smart cookie.And I might add...for a little variety.......and because I can. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Anathema Device Posted November 30, 2008 Members Report Share Posted November 30, 2008 My SO likes using it on me during foreplay and during oral. I like it when he uses it on me when I'm giving him oral. It's just one more added tool in the box! I thin, for him, it's a combination of "watching" something else get me off (even if he is ultimately the one controlling it) in a no-risk scenario (ie. not another man in the bed!). For me, it's just another stimulation, and the more the better! He jokes that he needs to be exposed to more carcinogens so he could grow a few tentacles. Tee hee.Vibrators are different - I can be tricky, depending on the time of month, my mood, the alignment of the stars so a vibrator is a "sure thing", and saves his (and my!) poor hands when it becomes evident that it will be a long time in coming and it has to be very, very specific for things to work! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members 12GAUGE Posted December 1, 2008 Members Report Share Posted December 1, 2008 Hubby asked me a simple question the other day that I couldn't answer, so maybe others here can. He asked me "Why a woman in a relationship with a willing man would need or want to use a dildo when she has a live penis available." And honestly, I didn't have an answer. So I guess the question is, why if you have a real penis available would you use a dildo. Good question I think and am interested to hear answers.BECAUSE YOU CAN.VARIETY IS THE SPICE OF LIFE.SOMETIMES YOU DON'T WANT TO SHARE. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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